====+++the core of your excistence+++==== ( Archived) (43)

Five dollars. Or about 9 1/2 pounds in G.B., or six dollars and 70 cents in Canada.

Once the awful truths come out they will plague you until you finally come to terms with them. You can run, but you can not hide,,,,. What you call a nervous breakdown is not necessarily a bad thing. The end result is usually more clarity of mind.

I read a good book on the subject one time,, "Mad in America". A history of the treatment of the mentally ill since the 1800s. Lobotomy was hailed as a "breakthrough"
by the New York times.

Self discovery is a journey we are all on, wether we know it or not. For most, fear has beat them down,,,,

No problem. When one sees clearly,, there is no morass.
Now getting there can be confusing if that is the "morass" you're talking about.
You can put it all off by having another beer,,,,

When I have looked for meaning in life I am usually disappointed. This is a world of lies, greed & random chaos.

Everything doesn't 'happen for a reason' - things happen randomly or through the will of people or animals. There is no guiding force. Many things that happen are detrimental or simply pointless. You may say 'I’m only at this place because this thing happened', but the last time u will say this will be on your death-bed.

Unfortunately, there are no angels, demons, gods, devils, ghosts, aliens etc. We create these to give life meaning & give events purpose. Religious people only try to convert u to their religion to give themselves a better chance of getting into Heaven. All religions have 3 core beliefs:

1. Our God is the one true God, all other Gods are false
2. If you believe in our God u will get all the things in Heaven that you can't have here - eternal life, absolute happiness, wings (angels), 30 virgins etc.
3. If you don't believe in our God u will go to Hell & experience all the worst parts of life - fire, fear, violence, hate, gnashing of teeth - but u will experience this for eternity (thanks for that). I hate threats.

For me, only love can give the world meaning, but even love is dubious & random. We love our family because they love us, but we would just as easily love another family if we were born into it. Families use many ploys to control each other - guilt, threats, pity etc. Many relationships begin at work, through friends, in a club etc - all random. There is no 'One'; there are many 'One-s'.

True love is empathy for an unknown person, but we only empathize because we can imagine experiencing the suffering we see. For eg, one time a little girl on the streets of Dublin asked me for some money - she was about 10years old, Pakistani, & looked like some lost kid who had just ‘come off the boat'. I gave her all my change. Immediately, about 5 rougher kids (6-9years old, Irish) surrounded her & asked her for some of the money. I was amazed when she began to distribute the money until she had none left for herself; but I knew that she had only done this through fear, rather than generosity & that she would continue to be abused until she 'toughened up'.

This is just my HONEST opinion but I'll probably be derided for it. People will say I'm too negative or that I 'take life too seriously'. They’ll say this because one can't be honest on social networking sites - everyone has to be shiny, happy people. In fact, 'irony' is all that’s allowed in this Postmodern world - everything is a joke & the biggest joke of all is emotion. James Joyce, the legendary Irish writer, said 'The greatest taboo of the 20th century will be emotion'- he was right then & right today.

I have had mystical experiences but they left me with more questions than answers. However, I'm still looking, waiting & hoping to find some meaning in this life & will continue until the very end. DMT is a mystical drug, so I’ll try it.

Funny, it's a bit like the 30 years of the Troubles in Northern Ireland- it was only when it was all over & life became 'normal' that I realized that I’d been living in a crazy place. Maybe we'll only realize what life was when it’s all over & we have something to compare it to– such as death, the afterlife or transcendence.

The concept of life fascinates me, but people will think I'm a weirdo for this. Ah well...