How and Why Women "Test" you. (167)
I get a kick out of woman who while on the first date mention numerous times thru-out the date that most men are always trying to get them into bed on the first date. Its like they're treating me like I suffer from ADD. 
Sometimes I think they bring it up because thats all they can think about... getting a little sumthing sumthing.
Sometimes I think they bring it up because thats all they can think about... getting a little sumthing sumthing.
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Sommerauer71: I do not think we do testing JB:
Or I don't.
I may well decide that I am not interested in a person, but not because of some sort of test.
I love fun, spontaneity, I love all of that, especially if I were to meet a person from here, that posts in the forums, I think you have a sense of what they are about.
I had one guy email me today and we chatted, he is not in here, but he was declaring his undying love for me, in the second sentence, those things put me off striaght away and I do not have to think about saying bye bye.
But I would not cancel a date as a test, I would offer my number if I wanted to speak to him, I would call him if I wanted to speak to him and if he has asked to call me then I will let him, if it has got to the calling stage, then it usually means I am comfortable and happy to do that.
Or I don't.
I may well decide that I am not interested in a person, but not because of some sort of test.
I love fun, spontaneity, I love all of that, especially if I were to meet a person from here, that posts in the forums, I think you have a sense of what they are about.
I had one guy email me today and we chatted, he is not in here, but he was declaring his undying love for me, in the second sentence, those things put me off striaght away and I do not have to think about saying bye bye.
But I would not cancel a date as a test, I would offer my number if I wanted to speak to him, I would call him if I wanted to speak to him and if he has asked to call me then I will let him, if it has got to the calling stage, then it usually means I am comfortable and happy to do that.
I´m not talking about the things the op has listed, I think most of those are as the rest of you have said... crap.
But I do think that people in the course of getting to know someone do things to see how a person reacts. If I´m dating someone and thinking of taking it to a more serious level..... he´s going to get an invitation to a family party. I´ll introduce him around a bit and then disappear for a while... at that stage it´s sink or swim. I am a very social person and I need to know that...
a. A man can get along with my family, or at least put on a bold front
b. He can handle himself in social situations
If our time together so far has been one on one then these are things I don´t know about him, but are important if the relationship is going to go any further.
I think everyone, if they think about it does things like this.... do you have a special girl friend that´s a bit of a nutter but you love her... and you´re looking forward to seeing how he gets on with her....
You´ve got an uncle a bit like our lovely Ship, quite crusty on the outside but a jewel underneath, aren´t you curious to see if he walks away thinking grumpy old cuss, or if he is able to suss out the truth?
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jbibiza: I´m not talking about the things the op has listed, I think most of those are as the rest of you have said... crap.
But I do think that people in the course of getting to know someone do things to see how a person reacts. If I´m dating someone and thinking of taking it to a more serious level..... he´s going to get an invitation to a family party. I´ll introduce him around a bit and then disappear for a while... at that stage it´s sink or swim. I am a very social person and I need to know that...
a. A man can get along with my family, or at least put on a bold front
b. He can handle himself in social situations
If our time together so far has been one on one then these are things I don´t know about him, but are important if the relationship is going to go any further.
I think everyone, if they think about it does things like this.... do you have a special girl friend that´s a bit of a nutter but you love her... and you´re looking forward to seeing how he gets on with her....
You´ve got an uncle a bit like our lovely Ship, quite crusty on the outside but a jewel underneath, aren´t you curious to see if he walks away thinking grumpy old cuss, or if he is able to suss out the truth?
But I do think that people in the course of getting to know someone do things to see how a person reacts. If I´m dating someone and thinking of taking it to a more serious level..... he´s going to get an invitation to a family party. I´ll introduce him around a bit and then disappear for a while... at that stage it´s sink or swim. I am a very social person and I need to know that...
a. A man can get along with my family, or at least put on a bold front
b. He can handle himself in social situations
If our time together so far has been one on one then these are things I don´t know about him, but are important if the relationship is going to go any further.
I think everyone, if they think about it does things like this.... do you have a special girl friend that´s a bit of a nutter but you love her... and you´re looking forward to seeing how he gets on with her....
You´ve got an uncle a bit like our lovely Ship, quite crusty on the outside but a jewel underneath, aren´t you curious to see if he walks away thinking grumpy old cuss, or if he is able to suss out the truth?
Of course I am curious about how a partner will get on with my family, but I do not make a big deal of it, I can sense a person who has good social skills, by the way they express themselves in written terms, how they answer their telephone, and so on.
I think the problem we have is the word 'test'
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Sommerauer71: Of course I am curious about how a partner will get on with my family, but I do not make a big deal of it, I can sense a person who has good social skills, by the way they express themselves in written terms, how they answer their telephone, and so on.
I think the problem we have is the word 'test'
I think the problem we have is the word 'test'
I read a really interesting article about communication, and what it boiled down to is that our words only express about 10% of what we say... the rest is tone, inflexion, body language, facial expression...
If words were all it took to truly know a person then there are a half dozen men on this site alone that I could happily jump on a plane for.... but the fact remains that we can´t really know a person without observing them in many different situations and whether we instigate some of those situations or sit back and wait for them to occur it is a major part of getting to know a person.
The word "test" does seem to have some negative connotations...
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jbibiza: I read a really interesting article about communication, and what it boiled down to is that our words only express about 10% of what we say... the rest is tone, inflexion, body language, facial expression...
If words were all it took to truly know a person then there are a half dozen men on this site alone that I could happily jump on a plane for.... but the fact remains that we can´t really know a person without observing them in many different situations and whether we instigate some of those situations or sit back and wait for them to occur it is a major part of getting to know a person.
The word "test" does seem to have some negative connotations...
If words were all it took to truly know a person then there are a half dozen men on this site alone that I could happily jump on a plane for.... but the fact remains that we can´t really know a person without observing them in many different situations and whether we instigate some of those situations or sit back and wait for them to occur it is a major part of getting to know a person.
The word "test" does seem to have some negative connotations...
I agree, but there are a handful who can articulate themselves very well and that says alot to me.
A careful well measured, post means that it has been considered and thought out, shows some self control.
There are many things that I take into consideration, but I do not need to 'test' a person to get a reaction and mark their performance.
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jbibiza: I read a really interesting article about communication, and what it boiled down to is that our words only express about 10% of what we say... the rest is tone, inflexion, body language, facial expression...
If words were all it took to truly know a person then there are a half dozen men on this site alone that I could happily jump on a plane for.... but the fact remains that we can´t really know a person without observing them in many different situations and whether we instigate some of those situations or sit back and wait for them to occur it is a major part of getting to know a person.
The word "test" does seem to have some negative connotations...
If words were all it took to truly know a person then there are a half dozen men on this site alone that I could happily jump on a plane for.... but the fact remains that we can´t really know a person without observing them in many different situations and whether we instigate some of those situations or sit back and wait for them to occur it is a major part of getting to know a person.
The word "test" does seem to have some negative connotations...
well put, my dear....so, when are you jumping on that plane??
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airliner: well put, my dear....so, when are you jumping on that plane??
Ohhh Hank
How did you know you were one of the half dozen????
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jbibiza: Ohhh Hank How did you know you were one of the half dozen????
because there is a whole lot more about me than the words I goofily utter in the forums, love
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rwantin: We all know this goes both ways, of course. Still, I don't have any issues with small tests that could involve her security or at least the means of reaching a point where she feels comfortable.
Of course, the tests (or in some cases head games) can indeed go too far. That's usually a great time to walk away...
Of course, the tests (or in some cases head games) can indeed go too far. That's usually a great time to walk away...
Robert.I didn't see your post.Worth bumping to the top.
Hope your dad is okay.
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Sommerauer71: I agree, but there are a handful who can articulate themselves very well and that says alot to me.
A careful well measured, post means that it has been considered and thought out, shows some self control.
There are many things that I take into consideration, but I do not need to 'test' a person to get a reaction and mark their performance.
A careful well measured, post means that it has been considered and thought out, shows some self control.
There are many things that I take into consideration, but I do not need to 'test' a person to get a reaction and mark their performance.
But that´s it.... it has nothing to do with performance, how a person reacts in a situation could be right for you and wrong for me... it´s the absolute opposite of performance and there is no right or wrong answer or reaction it´s about getting to know someone...
You and Ginger just have different ideas then I do... but I still respect and like you both!
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jbibiza: I read a really interesting article about communication, and what it boiled down to is that our words only express about 10% of what we say... the rest is tone, inflexion, body language, facial expression...
If words were all it took to truly know a person then there are a half dozen men on this site alone that I could happily jump on a plane for.... but the fact remains that we can´t really know a person without observing them in many different situations and whether we instigate some of those situations or sit back and wait for them to occur it is a major part of getting to know a person.
The word "test" does seem to have some negative connotations...
If words were all it took to truly know a person then there are a half dozen men on this site alone that I could happily jump on a plane for.... but the fact remains that we can´t really know a person without observing them in many different situations and whether we instigate some of those situations or sit back and wait for them to occur it is a major part of getting to know a person.
The word "test" does seem to have some negative connotations...
thats what I'm talking about Sommersaur "I agree, but there are a handful who can articulate themselves very well and that says alot to me.
A careful well measured, post means that it has been considered and thought out, shows some self control. "
both these instances can be indications of a devious nature.
I am both of these, and it can and does at times instill doubt in some of my upstanding, forthright, and amicable character.
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test 
when I pout it is not a test, I am serious
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jbibiza: But that´s it.... it has nothing to do with performance, how a person reacts in a situation could be right for you and wrong for me... it´s the absolute opposite of performance and there is no right or wrong answer or reaction it´s about getting to know someone...
You and Ginger just have different ideas then I do... but I still respect and like you both!
You and Ginger just have different ideas then I do... but I still respect and like you both!
You got my vote for likability and respect too JB.
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kkitty4u: test
when I pout it is not a test, I am serious
when I pout it is not a test, I am serious
You ate those chocolates to fast.
Maybe you have a belly ach.
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jbibiza: But that´s it.... it has nothing to do with performance, how a person reacts in a situation could be right for you and wrong for me... it´s the absolute opposite of performance and there is no right or wrong answer or reaction it´s about getting to know someone...
You and Ginger just have different ideas then I do... but I still respect and like you both!
You and Ginger just have different ideas then I do... but I still respect and like you both!
Oh absolutely JB; I like you too.
Ok, not to agree!
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As for the phone no. goes.1 reason a woman does that is to make sure your single,if you say I'll give youmy office number,obviously he's taken.
Don't sterotype in seriouness.There are both genders who play games.I never test a man or watch for reaction,so not all of us.Sorry that's what youv'e had to deal with.
Don't sterotype in seriouness.There are both genders who play games.I never test a man or watch for reaction,so not all of us.Sorry that's what youv'e had to deal with.
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nomindgames: As for the phone no. goes.1 reason a woman does that is to make sure your single,if you say I'll give youmy office number,obviously he's taken.
Don't sterotype in seriouness.There are both genders who play games.I never test a man or watch for reaction,so not all of us.Sorry that's what youv'e had to deal with.
Don't sterotype in seriouness.There are both genders who play games.I never test a man or watch for reaction,so not all of us.Sorry that's what youv'e had to deal with.
Nothing personal.General.
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friendsfirst: You ate those chocolates to fast.
Maybe you have a belly ach.
Maybe you have a belly ach.
nope, I just thought you would give me more than 2 pieces
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