Frustrations...? ( Archived) (24)

Mark if you have stated your intent on your profile...and you kindly remind people of why you're actually here, yet they persist because they want to save you...that's on their shoulders not yours....that has nothing to do with you at all but their willingness to listen to what you're really saying....so no people here who are taken...married whatever present no hindrance whatsoever...I see them as people...the same people they were before they were committed to someone....and like I say...if it's clearly stated on someone's profile that they are taken...and someone misconstrues something...then it's on that persons shoulders and their problem....I have been in a few situations where I have clearly laid it out to certain people that I only want to be friends...which they agree to...yet eventually persisted to try to turn it into something it wasn't...well as far as I am concerned they never wanted to be friends in the first place if they couldn't even listen to and respect what I was saying...so yes more than once someone has got pissed at me for what was their own fault for not listening and I just ended up cutting off communication with them.....for the simple reason...I don't want people or friends in my life who don't listen and hear what I have to say...I don't want people in my life who think they can manipulate me into doing something I clearly don't want to do...I don't want a friend with an agenda....so when I cut off communication with these people...I don't feel as if I have lost anything including friendship...because obviously they never really were friends to begin with...so like I said...the fact that others don't listen and hear what you are actually saying...and persist...has nothing to do with you or your actions..but their inability to hear and respect what you're saying.....


As far as distance...I don't really see it as a hindrance...I am pretty open and sure that if things are meant to be then they will be and two people who love and are committed to each other for the long haul will always find a way that is best for them and their relationship!!!!!

Sometimes you find What you were looking for when not searching for it.

Wow there, run that by me again LONG HAUL !!!!! whats that about, the expression Long Haul usually

refers to being in a confined space for longer than you really want to be, creating misery and distress.



Is that how you see being in a loving relationship is going to be, what happened to the joy, passion, affection the growing old together in a harmony that was built on friendship and joint knowledge

No wonder there so much .............Oh whats the point

I turned on my television to occupy my mind and attempt to restore my composure. The futility of this soon became apparent with my fidgeting and complete lack of focus. I soon found myself settling back into my computer chair and looking for the first time at someone else’s profile besides my own. I drank in every word, my mind rationalizing that no matter how long I looked at your profile, there was no way you could ever know, and that hours or minutes it would be the same. Further justification to remain on your profile was the obvious- my profile being tagged on your Who’s Viewed Me list would most assuredly be drowned by the multitudes of other men drawn to your perfection of form. Every time my mind decided that I was crossing the lines of decency, my heart drove these worries away. I cycled through your picture seemingly a hundred times, stunned by your innate beauty, passion and visible soul. I could not believe what I was looking at. Never in my life had a picture of anything sang out so loud and clear to me. I could literally hear you clear as day. Reading your profile and looking at each picture in turn captivated me and impressed too deeply to refuse an instant and ever growing desire to know more and more. I added you then as my first (and what turned out to be my only) favourite. I went to bed and dreamed solely of you. I went to work and thought about you with every spare moment I had. When I came home I faced one of the most difficult tasks of my life. I knew I had to reach out to you, and having never done so with anyone in my life, I was at a complete loss as just how to do this. I sat at my computer for hours before I wrote what later became one of my proudest moments. A simple (rather unheard of from me) and straightforward letter of introduction. I went to bed emotionally drained from this tiny little missive, hoping that sleep would wrap her arms about me and draw me into restful peace or at least keep me from opening your profile again. I had decided that I could not look at your profile again without making myself known and having some form of acceptance from you. I felt I owed you at least that for my hours long intrusion of the night before. Sleep was refused to me and my repose was unnaturally fitful. I have grown rather accustomed to broken sleep for most of my life, so for me to recognize this sleep as anything but the norm it truly was disturbed. I went to work and anticipated with every breath coming home to check my mail. I came through the door after work and raced to my computer, not even taking my coat or shoes off, loaded my home page, entered my name and password to see the most desired red light encapsulating the mailbox tab. I took off my coat and shoes, poured myself a glass of water and settled in to see who could possibly have mailed me. Wishing desperately that some letter from you was in there but believing more realistically that it was merely some new eastern world marriage proposal, I hesitantly opened my mailbox. My heart leapt into my throat and my breathing became extremely irregular when I saw your angelic picture beside the only mail in my inbox. I rationalized quickly that you were just being polite and nothing more. Tentatively I opened the mail to find my wildest dreams come true. Sure I didn’t know what a Skype was, but your were there and if not open armed, surely not closed arms either. Instantly any and all thoughts of leaving CS vanished.

Each black and white word from you reached into my heart and dashed themselves off the carefully constructed walls I had installed for protection. Eroding my defences like waves crashing upon the shore. Worse even than this was the simple fact that each word, after tearing at the stone shielding my heart, slid up and over the walls to imbed itself deep inside me. Each word or letter that struck my heart created resonating harmonies like a triangle and iron, pick and string, or drum and stick. Once I finally relented in my foolishness with Skype, I saw you again as if for the first time, and then the absolute pure magic of your angelic voice. Millions of questions hammered into my brain, even though we had already spoken on the telephone a few times before.

And that was how I lost my soul in a way that for the first time in my humble life allowed me to know that in truth I had finally found it.

Luscious...




They are, talking to me, and one of them got my name mixed up...

Tsk, tsk...

I knew it!


I just want to know who got it wrong, but i can still guess who.

Barren;;;

She knows...