Physical attraction ( Archived) (62)

I realized recently that I'm more particular about looks than I really want to be. I mean, we would probably all agree that we want to be attracted physically to someone if we are going to date them or more, but many of us tell ourselves that it's the personality and character and inner qualities that we really care about. Yes, these things do matter most, of course. But to what degree are we willing to overlook an unattractive exterior in favor of a beautiful inner being?
I had a serious problem in my left eye recently and the doctor told me that if I had ignored the symptoms, I could have ultimately lost my sight in that eye. All is fine now, he says, and I'm able to resume all my normal activities again. But this experience was, for lack of a better way of putting it, a real "eye opener"....
My imagination got the better of me and I thought of how different my life would be if I lost my sight, carrying it to extremes in my head to the point of total blindness. And among other considerations, I thought about dating and how I would no longer have any concerns about how attractive the man is physically. (Keep in mind that this is MY imagination running amok, and in MY imagination, even with my blindness, I'm still enjoying an active social life!!!! HA!).
In my usual long-winded way, the thing that really struck me is that I realized that there have been a number of men whom I have known through the years that I would definitely have dated and may have had something lasting and real with, but I didn't because I just wasn't physically attracted to them....they were some really decent and appealing men, intellectually and as regards character and personality, but I just couldn't ignore the fact that I wasn't physically attracted.
So.....
Normal?
Snob?
Stupid?
All of the above?

we will discuss this at length someday

ive had an interesting journey regarding this issue

hello lovey

I think we have all had interesting journey's at "our" age. Some good and some not so good.

Good question jib684, I see this quite frequently on this site and
in the outside world. We say outside apperance is not as important
as inner beauty, but most of us want the good looking one on our
arm. The last gentleman I was with for 2 years ans his friends
would always laugh and tease and ask me what I saw in that skinny
ugly old man. I told them he was very handsome in my eyes and
they would just laugh again. We are no longer together, but his
looks nor mine had nothing to do with our seperating. But also we
must not assume that all beautiful and handsome people are vain.
We are who we are and must learn to love who we are.

My sisters and friends, have joked about me having bad taste in men, in regards to looks.



This is where i say, looks are subjective.

What one finds attractive someone else might find less attractive. There does have to be a chemistry. Usually that seems to come thru physical attributes. I would say that women I've come to know better over time, I've also found them more attractive, if that makes sense?

i would have to say that it is completely normal...i think everyone who has ever been ''attracted'' to someone was ''attracted'' ,for the most part, in a physical way...not intirelly but, like i said, for the most part...i know a woman who has a degenerative condition with her eyes ...and is going blind....she went to a school for the blind...that helps them to be more independent...and by association, i often wondered the same thing you are bringing up here...i met alot of her friends from that school and its funny how they can ''see'' things that we can't....as far as what is attactive and what is'nt...i think we are conditioned to what is and what is'nt on a daily bases, with T.V. and magazines and advertisments...to me, believe it or not, the most attractive or unattractive part of a woman is her eyes...you can see alot about a person within there eyes, if you really look

This makes sense to me also.......