So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract? ( Archived) (109)

Aug 24, 2008 12:54 AM CSTSo you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
iamsimply
iamsimplyiamsimplyHolland Landing, Ontario, Canada15 Threads 6 Polls 166 Posts

So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?(Vote Below)

- (To Vote: select an option above, then press this button)
MENS ANSWERS ... do not select this line please!
4
3%
Yes
33
25%
No
19
14%
Maybe
14
11%
WOMENS ANSWERS ... do not select this line please!
2
2%
Yes
22
17%
No
13
10%
Maybe
25
19%
Total Votes
132
It's a question that pops up! It may cast a pall of distrust over the relationship or it may be seen as a positive thing!
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Aug 24, 2008 12:54 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
iamsimply
iamsimplyiamsimplyHolland Landing, Ontario Canada15 Threads 6 Polls 166 Posts
It's a question that pops up! It may cast a pall of distrust over the relationship or it may be seen as a positive thing!
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Aug 24, 2008 12:59 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
iamsimply: It's a question that pops up! It may cast a pall of distrust over the relationship or it may be seen as a positive thing!

It's seen as a positive thing if either party has a lot to lose.
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Aug 24, 2008 1:05 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
tipaly81
tipaly81tipaly81Moscow, Idaho USA56 Threads 15 Polls 950 Posts
iamsimply: It's a question that pops up! It may cast a pall of distrust over the relationship or it may be seen as a positive thing!


It's a positive. I have seen my family lose stuff over a divorce or even a death in the family. Generally other people on the opposite side of the family or marriage will snag stuff before we realize it.

I mean it's just stuff, but hang it all it's our stuff. I my case, farming land. So I say PRENUP and an air tight will. dancing better safe then sorry.
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Aug 24, 2008 1:06 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
iamsimply
iamsimplyiamsimplyHolland Landing, Ontario Canada15 Threads 6 Polls 166 Posts
mychelle: It's seen as a positive thing if either party has a lot to lose.


Your right, I think it takes some pressure off the relationship!
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Aug 24, 2008 1:14 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
iamsimply
iamsimplyiamsimplyHolland Landing, Ontario Canada15 Threads 6 Polls 166 Posts
tipaly81: It's a positive. I have seen my family lose stuff over a divorce or even a death in the family. Generally other people on the opposite side of the family or marriage will snag stuff before we realize it.

I mean it's just stuff, but hang it all it's our stuff. I my case, farming land. So I say PRENUP and an air tight will. better safe then sorry.


I've seen it happen in my family and to friends too! As you get older or retire it's hard to recoup the losses. I nearly lost my house but hung on to by giving up every stick of furniture, all my antiques, pay her debts and paid a lot in cash! I got nailed because I adopted her daughter and when you do that they give you a live birth certificate with you name as the natural father!
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Aug 24, 2008 1:20 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
tipaly81
tipaly81tipaly81Moscow, Idaho USA56 Threads 15 Polls 950 Posts
iamsimply: I've seen it happen in my family and to friends too! As you get older or retire it's hard to recoup the losses. I nearly lost my house but hung on to by giving up every stick of furniture, all my antiques, pay her debts and paid a lot in cash! I got nailed because I adopted her daughter and when you do that they give you a live birth certificate with you name as the natural father!


Wow, That is rough. In my family my grandfather had his inheritance picked through by my Great-grandfather's wife's children. Non of them were really part of the family. I mean their parents had married after they had all grown up, so they had no reason to take or look through my grandfather's things.

Similar things happened to my step-dad. He actually lost Millions because his relatives took it after his grandmothers death, then informed him of her passing.

Sorry, really got off topic. But I think that some how prenups and wills and such are all tied together. If you re-write the prenup, then you re-write the will, and maybe visa versa.
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Aug 24, 2008 1:35 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
iamsimply
iamsimplyiamsimplyHolland Landing, Ontario Canada15 Threads 6 Polls 166 Posts
tipaly81: Wow, That is rough. In my family my grandfather had his inheritance picked through by my Great-grandfather's wife's children. Non of them were really part of the family. I mean their parents had married after they had all grown up, so they had no reason to take or look through my grandfather's things.

Similar things happened to my step-dad. He actually lost Millions because his relatives took it after his grandmothers death, then informed him of her passing.

Sorry, really got off topic. But I think that some how prenups and wills and such are all tied together. If you re-write the prenup, then you re-write the will, and maybe visa versa.


Similar to your grandfather, my eldest brother married a woman with three grown children! His estate included 4 houses a place in Florida and a place up north! Each of her children ended up with a house and money in their pockets! They were married for about 30 years and everything went to my brothers wife and she doled it out. My brother had a child from another relationship but kind of left out and didn't get half as much! There should ave been an airtight will and at the begining of the relationship a prenup! She came in with very little working as a waitress,
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Aug 24, 2008 1:37 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
Claayer
ClaayerClaayerWild Wild South West, Cornwall, England UK107 Threads 9 Polls 15,888 Posts
Yeah.. maybe dunno
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Aug 24, 2008 1:39 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
Yes maybe
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Aug 24, 2008 1:42 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
keytone
keytonekeytonePortland, Oregon USA36 Threads 3 Polls 1,686 Posts
I might ....maybe ,,,heavens sake,,,I dont even have a coffee bud or a weekend movie partner!.,lol
Who would I make this with??
;-}
grin
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Aug 24, 2008 1:44 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
tipaly81
tipaly81tipaly81Moscow, Idaho USA56 Threads 15 Polls 950 Posts
iamsimply: Similar to your grandfather, my eldest brother married a woman with three grown children! His estate included 4 houses a place in Florida and a place up north! Each of her children ended up with a house and money in their pockets! They were married for about 30 years and everything went to my brothers wife and she doled it out. My brother had a child from another relationship but kind of left out and didn't get half as much! There should ave been an airtight will and at the begining of the relationship a prenup! She came in with very little working as a waitress,


It is a common story I think. Not just for the really wealthy, but those that don't seem to have much. But for what little there is, it means a lot. We really should protect ourselves and our families from such things happening.

But then again, in a perfect world . . . .
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Aug 24, 2008 1:53 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
gypsykisses
gypsykissesgypsykissesPort Huron, Michigan USA7 Threads 1 Polls 2,405 Posts
drinking sure, why not?
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Aug 24, 2008 2:23 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
woody636
woody636woody636Elgin, Illinois USA3 Threads 1,267 Posts
iamsimply: It's a question that pops up! It may cast a pall of distrust over the relationship or it may be seen as a positive thing!


Thought about this alot. Good thread! Yeah, I think I'd have to have one. My daughter comes first.
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Aug 24, 2008 2:35 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
Looks like I stand alone here.No,wouldn't and if I had whatever,no wouldn't ask him to.Marriage is not what many people have made itSupposeto be till death and I agree.I don't believe in divorce unless other commits a crime to you or whoever.I think it causes self fufilling prophocey.f you can't trust the other,don't get married.If you got $,then put some away before marriage and remember you have a will too.Just protect your kids.I am not material person and won't marry 1 who is.JMO
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Aug 24, 2008 5:39 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
shipoker58
shipoker58shipoker58Las Vegas, Nevada USA30 Threads 2,969 Posts
nope
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Aug 24, 2008 7:35 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
2catchastar
2catchastar2catchastarCorning, New York USA10 Threads 830 Posts
I would like to say no! that I do not belive in them. I would think if you loved each other enough to share your life with each other then you should trust each other as much too. But I also know there are reasons sometimes to have someone sign one. Like if one or both have kids from another relationship. It may be done to protect there intrests. For that reason I could agree. And with the way people are today it might not take a lot to convince me that it is the right thing to do.
But I guess I really am kinda old fassion and I would like to belive that the marriage contract is enough, that if two people love each other and want to stay together there should not be stipulations extenssions to the marriage contract. If you honor your vows, you shouldn't need anything else.
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Aug 24, 2008 8:19 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
Indyfella
IndyfellaIndyfellaindianapolis, Indiana USA152 Threads 8 Polls 18,150 Posts
2catchastar: I would like to say no! that I do not belive in them. I would think if you loved each other enough to share your life with each other then you should trust each other as much too. But I also know there are reasons sometimes to have someone sign one. Like if one or both have kids from another relationship. It may be done to protect there intrests. For that reason I could agree. And with the way people are today it might not take a lot to convince me that it is the right thing to do.
But I guess I really am kinda old fassion and I would like to belive that the marriage contract is enough, that if two people love each other and want to stay together there should not be stipulations extenssions to the marriage contract. If you honor your vows, you shouldn't need anything else.




I would like to say no too, but if by chance I EVER got married again...I'd have to mull it over. Here in Indiana if you're married less than 10 years and divorce, judges usually let each party keep what they had coming into the marriage. I would probably have no problem dividing 50/50 any accrewed assets during the marriage. JMO
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Aug 24, 2008 8:25 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
WhatUwish4
WhatUwish4WhatUwish4St. Augustine, Florida USA2 Threads 7,986 Posts
Great topic. Wish I knew the answer. Normally I would not consider a pre-nup since I would only get married to someone I trusted completely. But now that I have kids and live in a no-fault 50/50 state, I might feel obligated to legally protect them. I think I would, at a minimum, research the laws, etc to see if it was necessary.

But I'm a looooooong way from having to worry about this!
blues blues blues
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Aug 24, 2008 8:33 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
rwantin
rwantinrwantinRoyal Oak, Michigan USA17 Threads 8,924 Posts
I'm seldom stumped, but I am. I'm not necessarily sure. It's not like I have a lot of assets or anything. I suppose if she took one or both of the bikes that would just be an opportunity to buy more? grin
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Aug 24, 2008 8:37 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
Hugz_n_Kissez
Hugz_n_KissezHugz_n_KissezSomeplace, Ontario Canada59 Threads 2 Polls 25,438 Posts
For me things aren't that important...if he wants all the things...he can take them if they mean that much...I can buy more....those are replaceable..its the people who aren't....so nope I'm signing he can have it all!!!!!!!!!


professor roll eyes dunno grin
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Aug 24, 2008 8:38 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
Hugz_n_Kissez
Hugz_n_KissezHugz_n_KissezSomeplace, Ontario Canada59 Threads 2 Polls 25,438 Posts
Hugz_n_Kissez: For me things aren't that important...if he wants all the things...he can take them if they mean that much...I can buy more....those are replaceable..its the people who aren't....so nope I'm signing he can have it all!!!!!!!!!



*I'm NOT...roll eyes
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Aug 24, 2008 8:38 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
Indyfella
IndyfellaIndyfellaindianapolis, Indiana USA152 Threads 8 Polls 18,150 Posts
WhatUwish4: Great topic. Wish I knew the answer. Normally I would not consider a pre-nup since I would only get married to someone I trusted completely. But now that I have kids and live in a no-fault 50/50 state, I might feel obligated to legally protect them. I think I would, at a minimum, research the laws, etc to see if it was necessary.

But I'm a looooooong way from having to worry about this!



You've got your priorities right. thumbs up
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Aug 24, 2008 8:40 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
WhatUwish4
WhatUwish4WhatUwish4St. Augustine, Florida USA2 Threads 7,986 Posts
Indyfella: You've got your priorities right.


Thanks Indy... There's not all that much to worry about anyway, but I do feel it belongs to them. It's their legacy and God knows they will need it in today's world.

uh oh uh oh uh oh
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Aug 24, 2008 8:42 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
Indyfella
IndyfellaIndyfellaindianapolis, Indiana USA152 Threads 8 Polls 18,150 Posts
WhatUwish4: Thanks Indy... There's not all that much to worry about anyway, but I do feel it belongs to them. It's their legacy and God knows they will need it in today's world.



Were I married a year or so and then went "room temperature".....I'd want most of my possessions to go to my blood line...and not someone I'd been w/a year or so. Not that I'd want to leave the spouse empty handed, by any means.

Which reminds me...I need to update my will doh
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Aug 24, 2008 8:44 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
mrsmiles4444
mrsmiles4444mrsmiles4444Colonial Beach, Virginia USA26 Threads 397 Posts
iamsimply: It's a question that pops up! It may cast a pall of distrust over the relationship or it may be seen as a positive thing!


Absolutely. I feel it is a good thing to protect what you've strived to earn, or have, over your lifetime. I lost, ( voluntarily) everything, when I got divorce, only to maintain my sanity, and remove my name from anything associated with my ex, and I'll be dammed if I'll ever do that again. stupid, stupid, stupid, me.doh doh

It's the way of today. One never knows what tomrow may bring ,and how that person will act when things go wrong, ( if they go wrong). be prepaired for the unexpected I guess is reason for it. Today we love, tommorow, they want what I have. I dun think so!
they can have anything we've earned, or made for each other while together, yet what I have prior to US, is mine, what you have is yours.
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Aug 24, 2008 8:48 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
WhatUwish4
WhatUwish4WhatUwish4St. Augustine, Florida USA2 Threads 7,986 Posts
Indyfella: Were I married a year or so and then went "room temperature".....I'd want most of my possessions to go to my blood line...and not someone I'd been w/a year or so. Not that I'd want to leave the spouse empty handed, by any means.

Which reminds me...I need to update my will


I believe the common practice is to increase the proportion of assets with each year of marriage (used to date a trust attorney - at least that's how he did it).

I don't think I would get into all that. I would just want some sort of simple agreement that says this is theirs no matter what. I don't worry about the sticks and bricks unless they are family heirlooms better left with them for memory sake.
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Aug 24, 2008 8:50 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
rwantin
rwantinrwantinRoyal Oak, Michigan USA17 Threads 8,924 Posts
WhatUwish4: I believe the common practice is to increase the proportion of assets with each year of marriage (used to date a trust attorney - at least that's how he did it).

I don't think I would get into all that. I would just want some sort of simple agreement that says this is theirs no matter what. I don't worry about the sticks and bricks unless they are family heirlooms better left with them for memory sake.


applause Nicely put.
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Aug 24, 2008 8:52 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
WhatUwish4
WhatUwish4WhatUwish4St. Augustine, Florida USA2 Threads 7,986 Posts
rwantin: Nicely put.


bowing bowing bowing bowing bowing

I bet I know what you would keep...
motorcycle motorcycle



grin
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Aug 24, 2008 8:58 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
rwantin
rwantinrwantinRoyal Oak, Michigan USA17 Threads 8,924 Posts
WhatUwish4: I bet I know what you would keep...


I'd want to keep my goatee. grin
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Aug 24, 2008 9:00 AM CST So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?
WhatUwish4
WhatUwish4WhatUwish4St. Augustine, Florida USA2 Threads 7,986 Posts
rwantin: I'd want to keep my goatee.



But whta would you do if she asked you to shave????
laugh laugh laugh

Tell the truth
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Stats for this Poll

132 Votes
2,862 Views
109 Comments
by iamsimply (6 Polls)
Created: Aug 2008
Last Viewed: 21 hrs ago
Last Commented: Aug 2009
Last Voted: Jul 2017

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