So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract? (109)
It's a question that pops up! It may cast a pall of distrust over the relationship or it may be seen as a positive thing!
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iamsimply: It's a question that pops up! It may cast a pall of distrust over the relationship or it may be seen as a positive thing!
It's seen as a positive thing if either party has a lot to lose.
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iamsimply: It's a question that pops up! It may cast a pall of distrust over the relationship or it may be seen as a positive thing!
It's a positive. I have seen my family lose stuff over a divorce or even a death in the family. Generally other people on the opposite side of the family or marriage will snag stuff before we realize it.
I mean it's just stuff, but hang it all it's our stuff. I my case, farming land. So I say PRENUP and an air tight will.
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mychelle: It's seen as a positive thing if either party has a lot to lose.
Your right, I think it takes some pressure off the relationship!
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tipaly81: It's a positive. I have seen my family lose stuff over a divorce or even a death in the family. Generally other people on the opposite side of the family or marriage will snag stuff before we realize it.
I mean it's just stuff, but hang it all it's our stuff. I my case, farming land. So I say PRENUP and an air tight will. better safe then sorry.
I mean it's just stuff, but hang it all it's our stuff. I my case, farming land. So I say PRENUP and an air tight will. better safe then sorry.
I've seen it happen in my family and to friends too! As you get older or retire it's hard to recoup the losses. I nearly lost my house but hung on to by giving up every stick of furniture, all my antiques, pay her debts and paid a lot in cash! I got nailed because I adopted her daughter and when you do that they give you a live birth certificate with you name as the natural father!
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iamsimply: I've seen it happen in my family and to friends too! As you get older or retire it's hard to recoup the losses. I nearly lost my house but hung on to by giving up every stick of furniture, all my antiques, pay her debts and paid a lot in cash! I got nailed because I adopted her daughter and when you do that they give you a live birth certificate with you name as the natural father!
Wow, That is rough. In my family my grandfather had his inheritance picked through by my Great-grandfather's wife's children. Non of them were really part of the family. I mean their parents had married after they had all grown up, so they had no reason to take or look through my grandfather's things.
Similar things happened to my step-dad. He actually lost Millions because his relatives took it after his grandmothers death, then informed him of her passing.
Sorry, really got off topic. But I think that some how prenups and wills and such are all tied together. If you re-write the prenup, then you re-write the will, and maybe visa versa.
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tipaly81: Wow, That is rough. In my family my grandfather had his inheritance picked through by my Great-grandfather's wife's children. Non of them were really part of the family. I mean their parents had married after they had all grown up, so they had no reason to take or look through my grandfather's things.
Similar things happened to my step-dad. He actually lost Millions because his relatives took it after his grandmothers death, then informed him of her passing.
Sorry, really got off topic. But I think that some how prenups and wills and such are all tied together. If you re-write the prenup, then you re-write the will, and maybe visa versa.
Similar things happened to my step-dad. He actually lost Millions because his relatives took it after his grandmothers death, then informed him of her passing.
Sorry, really got off topic. But I think that some how prenups and wills and such are all tied together. If you re-write the prenup, then you re-write the will, and maybe visa versa.
Similar to your grandfather, my eldest brother married a woman with three grown children! His estate included 4 houses a place in Florida and a place up north! Each of her children ended up with a house and money in their pockets! They were married for about 30 years and everything went to my brothers wife and she doled it out. My brother had a child from another relationship but kind of left out and didn't get half as much! There should ave been an airtight will and at the begining of the relationship a prenup! She came in with very little working as a waitress,
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Yeah.. maybe 
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Yes maybe
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I might ....maybe ,,,heavens sake,,,I dont even have a coffee bud or a weekend movie partner!.,lol
Who would I make this with??
;-}
Who would I make this with??
;-}
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iamsimply: Similar to your grandfather, my eldest brother married a woman with three grown children! His estate included 4 houses a place in Florida and a place up north! Each of her children ended up with a house and money in their pockets! They were married for about 30 years and everything went to my brothers wife and she doled it out. My brother had a child from another relationship but kind of left out and didn't get half as much! There should ave been an airtight will and at the begining of the relationship a prenup! She came in with very little working as a waitress,
It is a common story I think. Not just for the really wealthy, but those that don't seem to have much. But for what little there is, it means a lot. We really should protect ourselves and our families from such things happening.
But then again, in a perfect world . . . .
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sure, why not?------ This poll is Archived ------
iamsimply: It's a question that pops up! It may cast a pall of distrust over the relationship or it may be seen as a positive thing!
Thought about this alot. Good thread! Yeah, I think I'd have to have one. My daughter comes first.
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Looks like I stand alone here.No,wouldn't and if I had whatever,no wouldn't ask him to.Marriage is not what many people have made itSupposeto be till death and I agree.I don't believe in divorce unless other commits a crime to you or whoever.I think it causes self fufilling prophocey.f you can't trust the other,don't get married.If you got $,then put some away before marriage and remember you have a will too.Just protect your kids.I am not material person and won't marry 1 who is.JMO
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nope
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I would like to say no! that I do not belive in them. I would think if you loved each other enough to share your life with each other then you should trust each other as much too. But I also know there are reasons sometimes to have someone sign one. Like if one or both have kids from another relationship. It may be done to protect there intrests. For that reason I could agree. And with the way people are today it might not take a lot to convince me that it is the right thing to do.
But I guess I really am kinda old fassion and I would like to belive that the marriage contract is enough, that if two people love each other and want to stay together there should not be stipulations extenssions to the marriage contract. If you honor your vows, you shouldn't need anything else.
But I guess I really am kinda old fassion and I would like to belive that the marriage contract is enough, that if two people love each other and want to stay together there should not be stipulations extenssions to the marriage contract. If you honor your vows, you shouldn't need anything else.
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2catchastar: I would like to say no! that I do not belive in them. I would think if you loved each other enough to share your life with each other then you should trust each other as much too. But I also know there are reasons sometimes to have someone sign one. Like if one or both have kids from another relationship. It may be done to protect there intrests. For that reason I could agree. And with the way people are today it might not take a lot to convince me that it is the right thing to do.
But I guess I really am kinda old fassion and I would like to belive that the marriage contract is enough, that if two people love each other and want to stay together there should not be stipulations extenssions to the marriage contract. If you honor your vows, you shouldn't need anything else.
But I guess I really am kinda old fassion and I would like to belive that the marriage contract is enough, that if two people love each other and want to stay together there should not be stipulations extenssions to the marriage contract. If you honor your vows, you shouldn't need anything else.
I would like to say no too, but if by chance I EVER got married again...I'd have to mull it over. Here in Indiana if you're married less than 10 years and divorce, judges usually let each party keep what they had coming into the marriage. I would probably have no problem dividing 50/50 any accrewed assets during the marriage. JMO
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Great topic. Wish I knew the answer. Normally I would not consider a pre-nup since I would only get married to someone I trusted completely. But now that I have kids and live in a no-fault 50/50 state, I might feel obligated to legally protect them. I think I would, at a minimum, research the laws, etc to see if it was necessary.
But I'm a looooooong way from having to worry about this!
But I'm a looooooong way from having to worry about this!
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I'm seldom stumped, but I am. I'm not necessarily sure. It's not like I have a lot of assets or anything. I suppose if she took one or both of the bikes that would just be an opportunity to buy more?
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For me things aren't that important...if he wants all the things...he can take them if they mean that much...I can buy more....those are replaceable..its the people who aren't....so nope I'm signing he can have it all!!!!!!!!!
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Hugz_n_Kissez: For me things aren't that important...if he wants all the things...he can take them if they mean that much...I can buy more....those are replaceable..its the people who aren't....so nope I'm signing he can have it all!!!!!!!!!
*I'm NOT...
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WhatUwish4: Great topic. Wish I knew the answer. Normally I would not consider a pre-nup since I would only get married to someone I trusted completely. But now that I have kids and live in a no-fault 50/50 state, I might feel obligated to legally protect them. I think I would, at a minimum, research the laws, etc to see if it was necessary.
But I'm a looooooong way from having to worry about this!
But I'm a looooooong way from having to worry about this!
You've got your priorities right.
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Indyfella: You've got your priorities right.
Thanks Indy... There's not all that much to worry about anyway, but I do feel it belongs to them. It's their legacy and God knows they will need it in today's world.
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WhatUwish4: Thanks Indy... There's not all that much to worry about anyway, but I do feel it belongs to them. It's their legacy and God knows they will need it in today's world.
Were I married a year or so and then went "room temperature".....I'd want most of my possessions to go to my blood line...and not someone I'd been w/a year or so. Not that I'd want to leave the spouse empty handed, by any means.
Which reminds me...I need to update my will
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iamsimply: It's a question that pops up! It may cast a pall of distrust over the relationship or it may be seen as a positive thing!
Absolutely. I feel it is a good thing to protect what you've strived to earn, or have, over your lifetime. I lost, ( voluntarily) everything, when I got divorce, only to maintain my sanity, and remove my name from anything associated with my ex, and I'll be dammed if I'll ever do that again. stupid, stupid, stupid, me.
It's the way of today. One never knows what tomrow may bring ,and how that person will act when things go wrong, ( if they go wrong). be prepaired for the unexpected I guess is reason for it. Today we love, tommorow, they want what I have. I dun think so!
they can have anything we've earned, or made for each other while together, yet what I have prior to US, is mine, what you have is yours.
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Indyfella: Were I married a year or so and then went "room temperature".....I'd want most of my possessions to go to my blood line...and not someone I'd been w/a year or so. Not that I'd want to leave the spouse empty handed, by any means.
Which reminds me...I need to update my will
Which reminds me...I need to update my will
I believe the common practice is to increase the proportion of assets with each year of marriage (used to date a trust attorney - at least that's how he did it).
I don't think I would get into all that. I would just want some sort of simple agreement that says this is theirs no matter what. I don't worry about the sticks and bricks unless they are family heirlooms better left with them for memory sake.
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WhatUwish4: I believe the common practice is to increase the proportion of assets with each year of marriage (used to date a trust attorney - at least that's how he did it).
I don't think I would get into all that. I would just want some sort of simple agreement that says this is theirs no matter what. I don't worry about the sticks and bricks unless they are family heirlooms better left with them for memory sake.
I don't think I would get into all that. I would just want some sort of simple agreement that says this is theirs no matter what. I don't worry about the sticks and bricks unless they are family heirlooms better left with them for memory sake.
Nicely put.------ This poll is Archived ------
rwantin: Nicely put.
I bet I know what you would keep...
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WhatUwish4: I bet I know what you would keep...
I'd want to keep my goatee.
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rwantin: I'd want to keep my goatee.
But whta would you do if she asked you to shave????
Tell the truth
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132 Votes
2,862 Views
109 Comments
Created: Aug 2008
Last Viewed: 21 hrs ago
Last Commented: Aug 2009
Last Voted: Jul 2017
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So you decided to live together or get married! Would you sign a prenup or similar contract?(Vote Below)