Finding someone so compatible and love us the way we want to be loved is a very rare occurrence my friend. But we can definitely make our relationship grow like a plant. We have the obligation to learn and know what makes each other happy. Fine tuning our ways and being committed to make each other happy is a key to a happy life. I'm willing to do my part provided, both are in the same page.
It truly is no one's fault my friend. We are either subject to our own incapability of understanding and no matter what the other do, may or may not make sense to us. We are all different of course, and our natural compositions do play very differently with others. Take our cultural beliefs, social values, mores and religious ways and boy don't we get thrown in a world of strange ideas?
Now it is important truly to adapt and learn and adjust and if we have hope of improving our relationship, so then it will grow and perhaps become strong and no matter what we do, will make our love happier and our connections will become an oasis of understanding, happiness and joys..I think..
Velsix, I am so glad with your presentation justifying the reasons why so, now, things are different.
I do learn that time, do provide us the important aspects of learning and adjusting to those we do fall in love with. Like I said, with my previous ex, I didn't ever experience any insecurity and or inferiority as I found out that he did so much to make sure I am the only one in his life. I believe it is the very conduct of those that we love more than those that are part of their past that make the dynamics of our jealousy alive and or strong.
Nevertheless, it is a very natural part of our life and when it does pose a threat to our peaceful connections, we must not leave unattended. Rather we should address it for purposes of understanding and if we keep doing things that hurt the other, then we become selfish and unmindful of the other's peace of mind.
I am not a jealous person, but lately I did feel very uncomfortable and injured and almost ran away as fast and as far as I can from whom, would have hurt me.
Me neither my friend, and this is why it is my fault. I take the responsibility that being with a younger man is to my disadvantage because of course, there is no more this call for a very sensitive area of raising a child with an ex, who constantly call your approval for anything she or he does. I do have reservations on the other things that is going on.
Yet, if I see it without being selfish, whatever makes the other happy, who am I to deny it? I am finding my way out.
Velsix, thanks much. You brought out one factor that affect our reactions to this trait. Age. So by then, we come to a point where we become more mature and in our maturity we do have the reason of knowing and or determining our strength to trust them that we love? Or is it in the recognition of the fact that we are old and therefore lack the luxury of our youth and time to keep fooling around and do everything to ensure our actions don't hurt the other?
Spark, I read from Wikipedia, how the horrors of these trait can bury man alive if not checked.
I personally believe, it is alright to a certain point to be jealous. After all we are human beings whose core of existence is of our feelings and emotions. It is one of the strongest feelings we have and can trigger many a pain and sorrow if not directed properly. I do believe that a legitimate explanation by the one being accused of mistrust is needed to alleviate further damage on a relationship. Otherwise it is very unhealthy to be holding those sentiments deep inside without addressing it for the growth of the new love.
I am sure there is nobody spared from being in the state of jealousy but it can help create in establishing a strong foundation provided there is enough patience and trust to be reestablishedd on such a smear of the love-ing state.
It is actually made out of a native plants (dry leaves, cook at a very specific heat and with a very specific pot and harvest the moist from the pot. A very time consuming and difficult process, G and that is why it is very expensive..But very effective I believe.
KN I am with you. I have never had any contact with anyone that I have been with, with the exception of my last as he fathered three of my lovely children. But we divorced when our youngest was 20, so obligation wise, there is no need for me to communicate with him.
The scenario is this: a 7 year old child do need both parents to carry on the essential and legal obligations to fulfill their needed parenting, but I just feel that there is so much intimacy on the subjects of which they choose to talk about, which has nothing to do with molding the future of the child they connected to bring up to this world.
Where as there are many families I am aware of that all talks and communications are that, per required. Now I find it selfish for anyone to curtail such a direction of building up positive environment to this child, but for heaven's sake why even break up a connection. In my point of view, anything that might require involvement of this child to be cared of, should never make the new relationship feel left out. That is my take but maybe I am wrong and therefore let this new one die.
My grand mother made them and it is the glue that raises up the cohesiveness of social attraction G.
The question is, how did you know about it? Perhaps an encounter with some beautiful Filipino women? And not too many of the Filipinos either as it is a pure product of the Ilocano tribe hailing from the North.
G how did you find out about the power of ARAK? To one's dilemma, it is better than 420, let me tell you. Yes, our shield to the sufferings of our failures and missteps are but hiding in the force of ARAK.
Thanks G. Makers and Jack Daniels do come in handy.
In my personal case, it is always the inability of the one I have met that left out most of the most important things in his life that will eventually take place and rather make me in an awkward position. The way we do things, treat our friends and ex are of crucial importance to the health of our new relationship. I never have to call and or chit chat with my ex. Our relationship is limited to those that require legal obligations if any. Bit chit chatting and talking about non essential are to me, undermining the new love found. Yet I discovered that openness and expressing what makes you feel uncomfortable helps in building the strength of the new one.
I understand my dear KN> In my personal experience I have never had either up until about two three years ago and the most recent. I believe that two people who has not known each other, other than that of telling who they are and same way with me is leaving all the essential keys to be learned. Unfortunately we do fall in love regardless of how uncanny one's life is, and it is in the process of how they handle the events that took place that is hard for me to understand.
Yet perhaps because there are some part of the past that needs closures and not quite there yet and it does pose a great pain in the new relationship.
I had a very long healthy relationship with my ex of 26 years and never felt the need of being jealous. It only took him three years to earn my trust and since then it was great. But internet relationship, I find out, is truly a very different case.
Mad thanks and yep it's the highlights of people's lives when the show begins. Our culture is so incomplete without sensationalizing anger. Look at all the movies, stories, news, all for the hype of anger enticement. Thanks again Mad and take care.
KN my friend, I'd be lying if I'd deny my time myself, but betrayal is the hardest of a reason to be angry, injustice and inhuman treatment, the roots of angers that blow our fuses deep and strong.
Yes my friend, forgiveness indeed is the only thing that release us from the bond age of hatred. A most likely result that stays with us should we fail to forgive. Thanks again my friend
Solamente, yes in fact if you're a robot and not programmed with such a trait perhaps the need is never called for, but you and I know it's not the case. Have you ever been angry at all?
On your last statement yes, our failure to understand and lack of patience can make us prone to anger.
Various dark emotions you presented on here which like I mentioned in the very beginning of my blogging, are all gifted to us through life. We all have it. We're all subject to its force and effect. The difference is that we can attempt to improve and tame this emotions through practice and the willingness to improve our conduct.
Minerva my most loving and soulful friend of mine. I love your technique, specially for the kids.
I definitely recommend that.
My level of tolerance is high when it comes to handling anger. Being in the world of professional vocation, we're trained to be of utmost importance to practice good manners and right conduct. To be an example of controlled application of emotions. A fine line between being professional and not is a very questionable margin specially when dealing with aggressive people. It's best to calm down, think and don't face head on anybody that test you on this emotions.
I normally ignore and don't acknowledge this aggression by, like Jim says, walking away.
Calleis my friend, yes at home as opposed to some other places, we do exercise the freedom of being more driven with force and vent our feelings more openly. Children are of course a normal subject of being angry if only to emphasize the need of learning.
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JEALOUSY AND ITS EFFECT IN OUR RELATIONSHIPS
Finding someone so compatible and love us the way we want to be loved is a very rare occurrence my friend. But we can definitely make our relationship grow like a plant. We have the obligation to learn and know what makes each other happy. Fine tuning our ways and being committed to make each other happy is a key to a happy life. I'm willing to do my part provided, both are in the same page.