I don't think this guy is shy. In response to my hello e-mail he immediately suggested we meet and first thing this morning said would text later today. He says he doesn't go out much but it sounds like a player to me. Not so inclined to hold my breath waiting for his text.
this guy asked to meet for a chat. I didn't ask. I sent him a hello text because I knew him from eons ago. e-mailed that he's very free and would text to agree on a date. said would text today and hasn't. What's the point. He could have just said hello back and not asked to meet for a chat. He came up with the idea. I'm beginning to think it's a bad idea to even mail someone a man saying hi as it goes to their head.
If you're not interested in someone isn't it simpler not to ask to meet in the first place? If a man says I'll text you later today and doesn't, should you write him off? What's with the game playing when nobody put a gun to their head to ask to meet. Likewise men who immediately want to fly over to see you then you never hear from them or men who contact you and when asked for a photo disappear? Is the world full of players who can't keep their word?
Agree with Steve. When I lived in London on my way home I was once approached by a little girl saying she was lost. I spoke to her and was rescued by a child who said he was her cousin. All throughout I wondered if it was some kind of trap to mug me. Likewise at tube stations I would avoid gangs of kids like the plague.
Knife crime by kids is rife in the UK. Safest not to intervene and just head your way.
Happened only twice that I went out met somebody and it developed into a relationship. I don't go out much. Clubbing is not my scene. Rely exclusively on CS and so far I've met a lot of people. Trouble is none except for one were my type. Still I live in hope.
I'd stopped bothering some time ago too. Recent weeks have dated again if you can call it dating when you just use it as an excuse to get out of the house and are not romantically interested in the man. this time though I'm interested and wondering if I'll be his type at all.
I've met a lot of people via cs, mostly for friendly coffees but occasionally someone crops up asks me out and I start looking forward to the potential whilst worrying if we'll hit it off and there will be a second date. When was the last time you got excited about a proper date?
Meds might be the solution. I've suffered insomnia in the past and unless I take my meds my mind ruminates and I can't sleep at all. it's a necessary evil but they improve your quality of life.
My ex was an IT guy. he would come home and sit at his computer and even bring it to bed. For some time he worked overseas, at other times he did shifts. In the end the neglect ruined the relationship. he wouldn't even watch tv with me, but stay reading a book. I built up so much resentment and pain at the neglect. We'd be out and he'd go back home to use the loo. he ruined every holiday with his ocds. I did not exist.
I'm like that too which is why I'll never get carried away enough to find somebody here not if they expect you to do the relocation, find a job etc. without lifting a finger as though you owe it to their good looks to do all the hard work.
I've been on this site two years. met alcoholics, sick men, selfish men,,,,,you name it I've met it. If I'm meant to find love it's not going to be online.
It's not a temporary thing. He says on his salary he just about covers expenses. Still I'll go there with an open mind and enjoy a holiday at my expense. he says he still wants to give things a chance.
When I mentioned the move I wasn't contemplating the near future, more thinking ahead to see if a reltionship in the future is possible which it is clearly not. My assets are illiquid and I 'm not going to liquidate assets only to come back empty handed if things don't work out. My ex of 12 years sent me home empty handed because in between contracts I dipped into savings to contribute to living expenses. I lost my job and after 12 years he'd had enough of me. No maintenance money as we never married. a lot of sacrifice gone down the drain. I'm not about to repeat the same mistake twice. My profession is tough and unless a man understands that I will not always have work and may need assistance, I'm better off on my own, taking on odd jobs when work dries up and getting some money from my assets. I just don't think things can go far with a guy like this. What if a person falls ill and cannot work, would he be the sort of guy to send you packing. In a relationship I believe there should be moral, emotional and financial support as needed.
I got clinically depressed living in London with my ex partner and the strain of contracting and instablility, everything put together ruined a 12 year relationship which was based on love.
I do not see myself returning to the UK on my own but am finding settling in native Malta very hard. I don't feel I belong here.
I happened to be contacted by this guy on cs. He's intelligent and handsome and we really get along and although I'd prefer to move back to London rather than Dublin I thought it would eventually be a good move to move to be with this guy. I cannot speak of love because we haven't yet met.
However any feelings will have to be nipped in the bud as this is not a guy who understands the difficulties I would have to face to be with him. He wants to give things a chance but admits he hadn't thought as far as moves and their implications. I asked him outright before I got even closer to him. Now I know I'm visiting a friend no more. I'll enjoy my holiday but nothing can come out of this. My mistake was perhaps booking my flight to see him before asking the all important questions.
Distance and finances can be a barrier to any relationship whether a long term love based one or an evolving one.
See reply above. I could find a job in the UK on my own and relocate there but I don't want to live there on my own. I don't plan on staying in Malta. I've lived the expat life and want it back, just don't want to be lonely abroad. A foreign boyfriend would be a reason to move but any partner who can't support another is not worth relocating for as there is always the possibility of losing one's job and savings in the UK don't stretch that far. The cost of living is very high. If I don't meet my foreign boyfriend I'll stay here with my illiquid assets.
You are entitled to your opinion of course. having lived the expat life I'm more inclined to find a foreign boyfriend and open to moving. I could relocate on my own and apply for jobs online. I still have recruiters contacting me from the UK but I don't want the loneliness of living in a city. I'm looking for a foreign boyfriend. What is so wrong with tyring? I've met a few guys on here. One visited me and we were totally incompatible, one admitted to having STDS, wouldn't touch him with a bargepole and this guy we've been e-mailing for six months but doesn't consider the option of moving to Malta and I'm open to relocation. Where does credibility come in. I'm an EU citizen, I don't need visas for the UK, I could find a job and move there on my own. I'd just rather move to be with somebody else. I know what it's like to be lonely in the UK. Unless I go there to be with a boyfriend I will keep turning recruiters down.
I don't need a ticket to a life in Ireland. In fact if I were to work abroad again I'd go back to London where I temped for 5 years and stand a better chance. I am only thinking long-term because he won't come to Malta and would expect me to go there. If i had a job and he wanted to come to Malta I would support him till he found one.
I'm in Malta so it's not next door but I got a low cost flight. I'm visiting but do not see a relationship evolving. Ireland has just had an IMF bailout and my profession can only be practised locally. In fact I struggled a lot in the UK worked mostly contracts and am aware that I wouldn't find anything better in Ireland. Hence I don't want to relive the difficulties of finding a job abroad plus those difficulties destroyed my long term relationship. I'm not thinking of the immediate future. I'm just assessing whether this relationship would stand a chance. I believe if one partner loses their job it is the other's duty to support them. If this guy can't support someone there is no point looking at a long term relationship as if I were to go there to be with him and lose my job I'd have to come back home empty-handed.
Does that mean that if you lose your job and break up from a long-term relationship that your love life grinds to a halt until you can find a job which will never come if your profession is not in demand? How would it feel to be in my shoes?
missingLondon Forum Posts (455)
Why do men ask to meet and promise to call and then don't call?
Missha I worked with the guy briefly aeons ago. I just said hi how are you, he said let's meet!