Among different sects of Christianity, the act is seen differently. Divorce is rare in Catholicism. Its much more common among Protestant sects. Statistically, the prevalance of affairs and full-time mistresses is much higher among Catholic cultures, who seem to be alot more tolerant of it. Perhaps confession has something to do with that. The option of nullifying the whole contract with a fair amount of ease in a Protestant culture actually reduces the chances of cheating, at least in my experience, and that is a cultural thing.
Monogamy isn't the problem, its the complete adherence to extremes that cause such a problem. "till Death do us part." is pretty absolute, and extreme. The only constant is change. Buddhist philosophy deals with marriage as a vow contigent upon the realities of life as a whole, not a vow contingent upon our fantasy of what life will turn out to be.
Marriage is not an act of love. Its an act of commitment. Love is an action all its own. Marriage may be motivated by love, but love is doing the dishes when she's tired, or taking out the garbage, or bringing home flowers.
Its obselete in the social scene. I've known several LT partners that didn't get married, had kids, and under common-law would be married. But getting the piece of paper wasnt' important to them because it wasn't about what the state thinks. Its about how they feel.
Its an institution utilized by the beauracracy to perpetuate its income. Gay marriage isn't so much morally reprehensible, once you get past all the rhetoric. Its economically reprehensible to institutions that dont exist without a fresh generation of taxpayers.
Life is a waterfall We're one in the river And one again after the fall Swimming through the void We hear the words We lose ourselves But we find it all.... Cause we are the one that want to play Always want to go But you never want stay And we are the ones that want to choose Always want to play But you never want to lose Arials, in the sky When you lose your mind You free your life Life is a waterfall We drink from the river Then we turn around and put up our walls Swimming through the void We hear the word We lose ourselves But we find it all.... Cause we are the ones that want to play Always want to go But u never want to stay And we are the ones that want to choose Always want to play But you never want to lose Arials, in the sky When you lose your mind You free your life Aerials, so up high When you free your eyes eternal prize Aerials, in the sky When you lose your mind You free your life Aerials, so up high When you free your eyes eternal prize
Marriage can be thought of as ownership to some. Having that piece of paper means you are locked, ball-and-chain style. But it doesn't have to be that way.
The only thing the paper really represents is your tax break for ostensibly committing to create new tax-payers. Otherwise, your just a partnership of single-entity corporate tax IDS.
The Road Less Traveled, published in 1978, is Peck's best-known work, and the one that made his reputation. It is, in short, a description of the attributes that make for a fulfilled human being, based largely on his experiences as a psychiatrist and a person.
In the first section of the work Peck talks about discipline, which he considers essential for emotional, spiritual and psychological health, and which he describes as "the means of spiritual evolution". The elements of discipline that make for such health include the ability to delay gratification, accepting responsibility for oneself and one's actions, a dedication to truth and balancing.
In the second section, Peck considers the nature of love, which he considers the driving force behind spiritual growth. The section mainly attacks a number of misconceptions about love: that romantic love exists (he considers it a very destructive myth), that it is about dependency, that true love is not "falling in love". That type of love is cathexis, it is a feeling. Instead "true" love is about the extending of one's ego boundaries to include another, and about the spiritual nurturing of another, in short, love is effort.
The final section describes Grace, the powerful force originating outside human consciousness that nurtures spiritual growth in human beings. To do so he describes the miracles of health, the unconscious, and serendipity—phenomena which Peck says:
nurture human life and spiritual growth are incompletely understood by scientific thinking are commonplace among humanity originate outside conscious human will He concludes that "the miracles described indicate that our growth as human beings is being assisted by a force other than our conscious will".
Random House, where the little-known psychiatrist first tried to publish his original manuscript, turned him down, saying the final section was "too Christ-y." Simon & Schuster published the work for $7,500 and printed a modest hardback run of 5,000 copies. The book took off only after Mr. Peck hit the lecture circuit and personally sought reviews in key publications. Reprinted in paperback in 1980, The Road first made best-seller lists in 1983 — five years after its initial publication.
Here's the difference, using bonding dynamics as a metaphor for human relationships.
Ionic bonding is like codependence. One atom (Chlorine or Cl, for instance) wants or is missing an electron. Another atom (Na, or sodium) wants to be rid of an electron to be stable. They bond into a salt, NaCl. Strong ties as long as there's no solvent. The minute solvent comes into play (H2O, or stress), they break apart violently, only to cling together again the moment the solvent evaporates.
Covalent bonding is between two atoms that are balanced electronwise, like C or carbon. They share their electrons at need, being an extremely stable compound on their own, but creating strong bonds with each other as chemical situations around them change. This is my kind of relationship. A partnership that is stable, independent, and yet flexible enough to come together at times of crisis in a unified way.
Gold And Silver, Sun and Moon, Kisses under both, I'm coming home soon.
Auric auras, Moon-dogs too, I think of precious metals When I think about you.
Gold and Silver Precious jewel I think of how Many times I have Played the fool.
Gems and fortunes Commodities we trade How many pieces of love Have you through The years mislaid?
Gold And Silver, Sun and Moon, Kisses under both I'm coming home soon.
Auric auras, Moon-dogs too, I think of precious metals When I think about you.
Astronomers delight, Moon-dogs in the night Silvery, whispery, fragile Beautiful they are, Love is brief sometimes Like a falling star.
But some may last Through ages to come Like gold they appreciate And like silver value hold And hot like sun, and bright Like moon, keeps us warm When in winter we are cold.
Gold And Silver, Sun and Moon, Kisses under both I'm coming home soon.
Auric auras, Moon-dogs too, I think of precious metals When I think about you.
We don't need a new ISM. We need to eliminate ism's. Beliefs and ideologies and their divisive nature are what start wars. BTW, the tone of response dictates relations further on down the line. I appreciate your need to control your thread, but you're as guilty of insult as the other parties. Trying showing a little respect and you may achieve real dialogue, as compared to whatever it is that exists in this thread. Ad hominem attacks work both ways.
"I don't know how WWIII will be fought, but I do know how WWIV will be, with rocks!" - Albert Einstein.
I love them all but these two are my favorites. Imagine, France getting its butt kicked by Jamaica...it could happen! Jamaica could hire a couple of mosquitos and they'd have a very frightening air-force. (Tidbit. The French army is the only army to issue a wine decanter as standard military equipment.)
"Good Happens. You may not like or agree with that at the time, but ultimately, when your life is over, if you try to respect people, if you treat them like you'd want to be treated, you will see this." - My Dad, on his Deathbed.
Just one thought on this post, and I'd like to share it. This thought is incomplete, because it doesn't address its converse. "remember that the smallest, most minute kindness is as potent as one that is of the largest most benenicent gift."
Think on that, as you go throughout your day, and interact with people. I just had this warm fuzzy feeling when I contemplated it.
Galactic_bodhi Forum Posts (9,196)
RE: Is Marriage an Act of Desperation?
It's cultural.Among different sects of Christianity, the act is seen differently. Divorce is rare in Catholicism. Its much more common among Protestant sects. Statistically, the prevalance of affairs and full-time mistresses is much higher among Catholic cultures, who seem to be alot more tolerant of it. Perhaps confession has something to do with that. The option of nullifying the whole contract with a fair amount of ease in a Protestant culture actually reduces the chances of cheating, at least in my experience, and that is a cultural thing.