I'm ONLY speaking for myself. I've been single for many, many years now (about 15 years to be exact). Life is so much simpler this way, for me. I've had family, friends and even strangers telling me to find someone "special" .
I think sometimes its good for people to learn how to be on their own and acccept themselves before they enter a relationship. I know it sounds fruity, but sometimes I think fate realises that you need to be alone at a certain time in your life so that you have the time to get to know and love yourself. Once you've reached that level of acceptance, you will have much more fulfilling relationships with the people you eventually become involved with. Its good to learn to live with yourself, before you learn live with someone else. Someone will come along when the time is right. Its better that way as you end up with someone you really love, rather than with someone just to avoid being alone.
"Excellence is an art won by training and habituation. We do not act rightly because we have virtue or excellence, but we rather have those because we have acted rightly. We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act but a habit." -Aristotle
Who said that a man has no right to cry? Who said that crying is only for women?
Both men and women are human, made of the same materials (if I may say so), and have - of course - emotions. Both can feel happy, sad, annoyed etc. What makes them different is physical appearance (resulted in different role) and social treatment. The later is not originated from God's rule. It's a cultural product.
Women are always considered weaker than men. On the other hand, men have to be always stronger, tougher than woman, physically and emotionally. That's not fair. Crying is one of emergency way to get better when we feel sad. If the sadness is too much to handle, then what else can we do? Cry! This is much better than pretending that we are strong (because of we are men) while we have no way to make our burden lighter. It has no relation at all with strength or weakness. This is only a way to avoid from being deppressed by our sadness.
But what we will find in this real world is there is a kind of convention that men don't cry. That's why most of men look very tough in public, but they cry out loud in their own hidden-private-room. This is still better than trying to pretend as a tough people anytime and not to cry when it is time to cry.
Intimacy is built on feelings of inner emotional safety, security, confidence, courage, self esteem, self worth and resilience that allow one to explore one's self and one's partner without fear of rejection, disappointment, abandonment, judgment, offending or being offended and so on. It is also what allows and is prerequisite to creating a genuine, authentic, loving, solid, sustainable and fulfilling relationship. Without it one is simply fooling one's self. You are likely aware of how many here adopt the defensive posture, known colloquially as "game playing" in order to avoid getting hurt, getting the upper hand, and so on. This is happening in epidemic proportions and so few even stop to question whether a) it's what they want and b) there's another way.Sadly too many have had their Heart's shut down by a life history of negative or disappointing events in early relationships. It is these events, stored as negative memories, that condition individuals to a) forget what it means to feel and be authentically present and b) be unable to truly love in an open and fearless way.
Valentine's Day celebration is a recent phenomenon in India but has caught the fancy of people to a great extent. Though some see it as a western import and hesitate to celebrate, there exist a large and growing number of those who love the feeling behind the beautiful and romantic festival. Especially to the Indian youth February 14 signifies love - a day when people express their affection for others. Just as several other countries, people in India too celebrate the Valentine's Day by exchanging cards and gifts.
On February 14, the Valentine's Day restaurants, discos, Cineplex, pubs and pizza parlors see a particularly busy time as couples celebrate the day in togetherness. Many boys and girls even propose to their sweetheart on this romantic day. People also express love to their friends, teachers, siblings and parents. Popular Valentine's Day gifts exchanged in India include chocolates, fresh flowers, cards, soft toys and candies. These are also clubbed with several other gifts to pamper sweethearts.
Hello milena,I know that emotions are very real. Yes, when you feel it for a man, it is hard to see that he could be a player. Now, I am not saying that your man is a player but you need to be rational even when you're goo goo gah gah for a man.
Any man who leaves you confused is not worth your time. Someone who says, "I love you but I'm not in love with you" or "I love you but I want to take a break" is a player.
Players should be dumped. And the fastest way to help a player understand that you're not an idiotic doormat is to get out of the equation.
I don't care how sweet of a heart he is. He can't have a sweet heart nor be a Sweetheart if he's leaving you confused. Men who want to have their cake and eat it too will do this to women. They will leave you in limbo, leave you guessing, leave you hanging. Oh, Please!
Stop trying to decode his behavior and get a man who you don't have to work so hard to figure out. When a REAL man wants you, his behavior will be consistent, he'll communicate his intentions, and you wont have to work so hard to play little child's game.
Meeting the right woman to date and form a serious, lasting relationship with can be done, but you must understand women well to be able to be successful in this area. Most men find women to be very difficult to understand. Give yourself some time and you will be able to find the right woman for you.
Women change their minds very quickly and without good reason, or so it may appear. Men like to be problem solvers and get to the bottom of things very quickly. Be patient with the woman you are interested in and allow her to change her mind without you questioning why she is doing it.
Women want to be respected and listened to. Instead of trying to solve our problems right away, listen to us explain what happened and then gently offer ideas that may be helpful. This is completely different from the approach you would take with a man, who just wants to solve the problem and move on.
It will also make you more appealing to women if you are willing to take the lead with small things, like making decisions about where to eat, where to go on vacation, and how to handle day to day situations. Even though women can easily do these things for themselves, they appreciate it when the man steps forward to take charge.
Show the women you are dating that they are important to you. Make them have a special experience when they are with you and they will want to experience more of that from you. Meeting the right woman is the first step in the process, but using these techniques will help you to win her heart forever.
In some cases, a man may discover that he is in love with two woman at the same time. Maybe he does not love them in the same proportion. Most likely, he may love one of them more than the other. Yet, he still has feelings for the other woman. Except for those who want to deceive themselves, this situation is common to many men.
Somehow, even after marriage, men still nurse feelings for some other woman outside. The feelings might not be as deep as it once was, but it's still there. And to make matters worse, it shows up every now and then.
For instance, you could find yourself thinking about the other woman often, wishing you were in her company rather than the person you are with. You could be moved to want to call her even with the other lady present. And when it appears that there is a pattern of boredom or rut in your present relationship, your mind immediately goes to the other lady. You feel that you would be able to freshen up your life with her company.
Will this work?
Does it pay to have two women in your life at once?The answer is NO. No one is cut out to have more than a relationship at once.Attempting otherwise has led to the emotional devastation of many a man.The best way to handle the situation is to deal with it decisively once and for all. If you don't, you are playing with a potentially explosive situation in which you might end up losing both ways.You need to really consider the facts and weigh the consequences of your actions, and see where it will affect you negatively.
Steveno Forum Posts (485)
Finding someone
I'm ONLY speaking for myself. I've been single for many, many years now (about 15 years to be exact). Life is so much simpler this way, for me. I've had family, friends and even strangers telling me to find someone "special" .