OK, a tad reluctant to ask this one, but I’ll just expose myself as I’ve already exposed myself willing to go gay for a day.
What if she excites me to the level of Mr. Marine in my jeans ready for blitz krieg, how do I excuse myself and get to the toilet without her noticing?
I don't want to scare her off with my potential before the main course.
I’m not that old really, so I probably don’t qualify to be on the same page in the dictionary as a geezer. I simply like the word and wanted to address myself thus at least once in my life. Well, that’s one off on my exciting list of things to do in life, I reckon.
So, a date is to be had.
I’m to romance her off her feet, swoon to such an extent that she will call her father and demand he take those 5 stinking camels off my burdened shoulders. I’m quite confident I can pull off a fine evening and impress without using my matchstick tricks or Ned Flanders impersonation. However, I want to be on the safe side, so I want an impeccable self to appear at the approach of when I pick her up and live happily forever after.
I sport a Johnny Depp pirates tash, which I know is not really up her alley, but I want it to remain. I don’t know why, I have no plans to pirate anything, not even her. Well, just a little a little plan of little pirating, to be honest. I’m a highwayman after all.
I’ve never been to a barber, never been sat in a chair leaned back and have humid, hot towels wrapped around my face, never had a serial killer weapon sharp the stubble off my chin, and now’s the time for a session.
But the rest, how about the rest?
My face, I’ve heard about facial masks. I’ve heard when applied and removed, they’re supposed to make the skin of your face feel like a baby’s butt. I really don’t care what it would feel like under my own hand, what tickles my fantasy is that such a skin would probably make her hand, and her lips, create an even greater sensation that I already imagine.
So, where do I get these “masks”? The trick or treat shop it is not, I dare guess What am I supposed to look for
I’m a footballer, soccer as it’s nerdly and error like called in the Americas. I played up until I was moved down like high grass, twice, and my ankles took an unrecoverable beating. I have football player feet, with bits on my heels so thick you might think I had hobbits in my family.
What do I do with that skin? Peel it off with a grater?
What more?
How should I dress? I don’t want to overdo it with a suit, so I think I’ll go with the James Dean casual slick.
Let get as gay here. Any suggestions are welcome. Should I have a manicure, a pedicure, a cure my crazy bits of off humor?
My second cousin was given this post of yours by my second aunt who’s appointed chaperon.
“Dearly beloved goodman2008,
I am somewhat confused by this message. I thought you loved me, and due to the fact that you have not replied to my previous message, combined with this, it only it seems as if you are fishing in several ponds.
I want your rod to remain in my pond and no other. If you dip your lure in I will put my lips around it and make the stick shake Then you can reel me in and keep me in your bucket of love I want to be your fillet of plaice, and you can be my fish-finger
Think I might have someone for you. It’s my second cousin so I can vouch for her. She currently lives in a refuge centre in Dalarna, Sweden, where she has been since the war in Bosnia erupted.
Dalarna is known for their characteristic colorful horses carved in wood, their weird dialect and the fact that all men drive around in “raggarbilar”. Think Grease. But none of this matters as she is willing to move to your New York home.
She doesn’t have Internet, but we sent someone on a horse to deliver a print-out, and she was ecstatic upon reading it.
Here’s her response:
“Hi goodman2008,
I read your above post and immediately felt a strong bond. It feels like I have finally found my soul-mate, to such a degree do I feel you’re what I want that I think we can skip the cliché step of getting to know one another, and just get engaged. Can we do it on the Internet? Facespace? Today?
I know that you are dying to learn everything about me, and I will tell you all when I move in. For now, some of my interests are: Betting my pension on horses, bingo, watching Bold & The Beautiful marathons, I like to chew butter, imitate the film-trailer voice and rhyme replies to what you say to me.
Your from now on forever
Fluffypuffy 67 years young, and at last I found my maharaja”
PS. Is the surprise you will give me big? hi hi… <blush>
Chop parsley and red onion Cut up herring pickled in mustard in really small pieces Mix all of this together Boil an egg, cut it in half, take out the yellow, put some of the above mix inside instead Top it with a bit of caviar
Main:
A couple of nice fresh chicken fillets Beat them flat, until they’re half a finger thick and the size of a palm Put each filet on a bit of aluminium foil Squeeze some lemon over each fillet Salt, pepper Put a thin slice of ham on the fillet, use two if one will not cover the whole chicken Cut up Greek Feta cheese into tiny pieces, sprinkle over the ham and chicken Some basil Roll the whole fillet into a cigar-shaped serving, using the foil to roll it inside and as to keep it together Into the oven
Fresh potato, pealed and cut up in wedges, salt, grill mix, into the oven
Cut up some fresh green, yellow and red pepper in thin slices and fry on one side of the pan, use the other to fry some fresh chanterelle
Take out the chicken, remove the foil, put on a plate Put some potato to it’s side Adorn with fried pepper and friend chanterelle
Serve with yoghurt based cold sauce Cut up chive, shredded carrot, lots of lemon, some salt and a good stir
Together with Gaza salad, Ruccola (Arugula) mixed with close to minced tomato, cucumber some onion, parsley, dash of lemon, salt, olive oil and Cheyenne pepper to give it bit of sting.
Wine: An Italian Red Domìni Veneti Amarone
Dessert:
Fresh fruit, cut up watermelon, honeydew, kiwi, Japanese pear and mango in small pieces
PietroPaoloV Forum Posts (722)
Women, I have a date. Can you sort an ol’ geezer out?
Mala, to do dobro motas nas jezik