What do women really want:

was asked in the forum today (or yesterday probably by now). So I thought for a moment - as if I haven't had the thought a thousand times before - what do I want? Besides mango sorbet or chocolate chocolate chip ice cream. I once wrote out a list of attributes that would add up to my ideal man on the theory that the Universe could not fill my request if I didn't actually make it.

I suppose one could be excused for expecting the freakin' Universe to read your mind but if 'they' are right and the almighty is a HE well, mind reading is definitely out of the picture! Never hurts to cover all the angles or the bases for that matter.

I have always thought looks were unimportant but my sister pointed out that I always bring home eye candy with brains. Truth is, if you asked me to describe any of my partners it would be their eyes and voices I remember, the things I notice first and things that will turn a yes to a no very quickly if I linger over a nicely rounded butt and muscled (hairless) back. Maybe my sister just has the same taste in men as I do.

Then there is scent. Each of us has our own intrinsic aroma although with all the additives to soap it is getting harder to rely on the nose as a guarantee for compatability and health. An otherwise perfect man who smells 'wrong' - not unpleasant or unclean, just not a match for my receptors - will not raise an eyebrow for me, far less a pulse rate.

An aptitude for using the brain encased inside the skull is an essential. A good mind meld will make me your fool, and I will tolerate a great deal for a mental fit. Too much on at least two occasions. Emotionally available would be enchanting, to actually encounter that once before I die...! My first husband was so available he had no boundaries at all, my first (and last) experience of very, very needy.

An ability to have fun and laugh in and out of bed, to appreciate that the most sublime sensations available to us come encumbered with elbows and knees and incongruent heights and some very strange positions and occasional stranger sounds and natural reflexes; gods, if it's taken too seriously it becomes a farce of dishonesty and posturing. And where's the fun and pleasure in that?

So I both know and don't know what I want. It might be easier to list what I don't want and the odds are, that because i am a woman some of my definite deal killers would be on a general list of 'not desired'. Well may be I'll write that but not now. Now I need to make a final forum run then go to bed. I can sleep for six hours and be on time at the wedding.