Is "separated" single? ( Archived) (75)

I am just a simple American ....what is a " botty!"

I have learned from experience that being with someone who is only seperated is a risk to take. Some yes will end up going back but I also have heard and known some people whom have not gone back.

It is a tricky thing. You just never know. I think its worse if children are involved especialy because you always have that tie with that ex no matter what.

I won't say that I will not date someone who is seperated but I am more careful about my feelings towards them and I believe strong communication is also a good key.

Tracy :o)

No I don't and no I wouldn't...sorry guys but Partners with divorces are messy enough partners that are seperated...HELL NO!!!

So folks that have kids but were never married are okay?

And you'd opt for someone just out of a 10 year relationship over just out of a 2 year marriage?

Or what if they're legally divorced from someone they remarried multiple times?

I dunno...seems like an awful lot of factors to consider when stereotyping one way or another.

I personally have not had any luck at all with ones that call them selves separated. Here's one---I found out yes he's separated, but legally still married, how long has he been separted oh fifteen years---inbetween has another child w/awoman whom he only lived with a short time. The woman died in her recliner, when the child was four, for four days no one came to help the little girl. Finally a relative arrived. Now that is a messed up scene. The little girl is now eleven has a learning disability, and a diffinent weight problem. I feel sorriest for the insecurities which will probably last a long long time. There was a lot more problems with this little girl but I cannot even discuss it. So this was the end of my ever hearing that word again (as far as deep involvement goes) not because of the child, but because of his lack of involvement w/this child during that time frame.

Yup there are a lot of factors.I don't dispute that. I knew this would piss in your corn flakes...lol

My biggest issue is contact with the ex which is rarely pleasant...there are SOME situations that are unique.

I want someone who is free and clear to love me and put me first in his life. That's what I have to offer...is it wrong to want the same?

I have found Men who have been divorced...have a been there done that attitude. It is not new or exciting to them. No big Whoop... Makes ya feel like it's nothing special. I waited a long time and with this attitude I'll probably be waiting forever but damn it if and when I am ever gonna get married I want the other person to feel it as much as I do...not just going through the motions...again...

I don't know many people to go from being married...to being divorced without being "separated" first...

Having a relationship with a separated person to me is the same as having a relationship with a person who has an "ex" and children or lives long distance...it is workable but takes more time patience and effort..

Believe me a divorced man is just as capable of hurting and deceiving you as a separated man is...the term "divorced" does not absolve them from this..

Mine was divorced....I just picture seperated as being even more attached and less resolved..Even more messy....RUNS SCREAMING>>>>

I agree to a point with the less resolved...but circumstances sometimes dictates whether or not you can be separated or divorced at the moment...

I still maintain that even though "divorced" seems to be translating to "free and clear"...a divorced man is still committed to his ex to some degree...and even more so when there are children involved...(the same judge that granted the divorce can attest to this!!...lol...)

Maybe i misunderstood the meaning of separated
I understand it as not living together because of unresolved issue(s).