Emotionally stable ( Archived) (192)

Should I get you some buckets?

I'll take just rest a bit....i'll o be k!

I am sure you will fine, how could you not be with a great sense of humour such as yours?

just a morning thought, I sometimes think those of us that are alone are more emotionally stable than those who are "always getting in" new intimate relationships.

I think some are so unstable emotionally they need to have someone close even if it requires that they themselves misrepresent themselves in order to "be in" a relationship.

I will in a heartbeat skip all what have been said so far and simply add my thoughts...

This is CS, where we all have different experience, age, reasons, culture and personality.

Where I am today I was nowhere near a year ago. What changed? Nothing really, but I have come to terms with the ghosts in my closet and start to be more relaxed about things.

From live dynamite to a sleeping puppy; things could turn around, my world could be thrown up side down and I would become tense again.

Few of us will be stable until we have reached some kind of "happiness", with our selves, and it takes some time. Just because a person here today is writing erratically, showing moods and anger, it does not at all say that he is a emotional instable person in general, it only describes him as he feels today. Tomorrow he may have come to terms with his ghosts and will start to take space.

We have many faces within us, and we choose to suppress the ugly ones when we have the strength. That is what I call emotional stable, and we are all in different phases of reaching that here.

I guess almost half the people here meet someone outside of CS when they reach that point, which means all the communication we would have had with them here would never lead to anything more. They feel more at ease with dating in their own neighbourhood, but use CS as a place to settle their minds.

Let me go ask my shrink then I'll let you know

Ah my friend, you have just sized up beautifully what I think is a tough subject.

Indeed, a world where we all live can become tough and hard to deal with at times, non of know what can happen in an hour, next week, next year. And happiness within ourselves is important, when we have learnt to accept who we are and not frequently have to defend who we are. CS is a place where relationships, not just romantic ones are built and that does provide steadiness, because it is a place where we all know we can come and we are not alone.

There are many times I have come full circle, when my marriage broke down to my last relationship ending quite spectacularly, reducing me both times to a wreck where people could not reach me, for me stability, is when the people who care about can reach me, they cannot when I feel rocky, because I go underground, completely and do nothing other than suffer, that is what I did, alone and bereft of any feeling whatsoever, but I came through that after the love of a couple of good personal friends who helped me through what was a terrible time both times.

Stability is different for each person, I want some emotional turbulence in a relationship, and that is good turbulence, where there are challenges in a good way, and I have those now, learning about me and about how to include another in my life, that can be ruffling at times, but I know when my fathers are settled I am happier now than I have ever been, I know I have been happier within myself for at least a year, with some thoughts of sadness on what has happened in the past, I do look back with sadness at times, and fondness, a combination, but I have accepted it all. And acceptance is a blessing for me.