If & when your parents get too old to take care of themselves what will you do? ( Archived) (36)

Considering the three choices in this poll....

And since I already commited my mother to a nursing home and she died there (not being ignored, by the way).......

I'll go with Stooie's choice

No question. Care for them.

I quit my job, left my house, and gave up grad school, to come home to take care of my Dad.
I would -never- have seen him put in a nursing home -ever-.

I ended up having to put my grandmother into assisted living. It wasn't an easy choice, however it turned out to be the right one for her. She made some wonderful friends there and I almost always made sure I got in on the weekends to take her out for a day. I was fortunate that the home she ended up in was filled with love by patients and staff. The ironic part of it is that this particular home was classified as a welfare home.

dave, I do think that decent nursing homes exist, and IF my dad was the type to be able to deal with it, then fine, he just isn't. LOL

My mothers, hell no, she hated doctors and much as I do, and sniveling, well where in the hell do you think I developed such a distaste for it ? LOL Nope, she barely let us help her out, so would be kicking and screaming at the very mention.

I will give them each a gift certificate for one free visit to Dr, Kavorkian

I know some elderly that wish their kids where that compassionate to them

my parents are both dead....I am the oldest living member in my family!!

Recommend euthanasia...

Death with dignity....
its sad that society in general has given euthanasia such a bad connotation.

often wondered if those in nursing homes or who have lost the quality of life how they would vote on legalizing euthanasia.

fairly recently went thru this myself with my Grandmother after she had a bad stroke,, luckily I worked in a nursing home,, Was great because we got to see more of each other than ever, she was so bad off she had to be there for the rehab. and was only there for 2 months..
Moved her in with me and she passed from another stroke just 7 weeks later.

Dudes... When someone ask a serious Question.. Please keep the jokes in the joke threads... This is not a funny issue and Im sure Scittish don't appreciate any more than I do.

or you could always go tell jokes at you're Moms funeral.

Thank you in advance.

About 5 more weeks and mom will be moving in.. She is 87.. Can you imagine that, I have a younger mother..

Currently going through this with my father. My sister and mother passed away last May and now he's alone and 800 miles away from me. He refuses to move here to live with me and I'm unable to move back home to be with him. He wants to sell the house and go into assisted living. I'm torn. Duty says to sell my home and go home. My heart says stay where I have made my life and have a great career that I love. My child wants to stay here. I am constantly traveling back and forth to take care of things. I'm the youngest! We have a lot of support where he is with life time family friends.
It's been extremely difficult knowing that he is getting to the point that he shouldn't be driving anymore and he refuses to "give up his independence". How do I convince him? I can't.
We have discussed the market and as soon as it turns I will have to put my childhood home up for sale. That's been devastating in it's self.
He is not at the point of not being of sound mind.....his body is getting fragile.
I have to sit back and allow him to decide for himself and have his dignity.

This is not an easy place to be.

I believe I said that. Hello?

I also said it's not an easy place to be. When caring for my elderly parent from far away it's not easy and for me has torn me emotionally. Especially when I am watching his body give out.

At least one that's affordable! The one he wants to go to is 300K a year! I about fell over when I heard that! So the search has begun.

never heard that high... Where is he at?

Honestly, the hateful part of me that says, "They kicked me out and left me when I was young and helpless, screw them."

The reality of it is my heart is bigger than my hate (Thank God), so I would do my best to take care of them.

I have seen it over here as well with my very own eyes. The stories I could tell. I would look after my parents myself if the need ever arose, but I somehow doubt that's the way they have things planned.

I just stopped in to see how the results of this poll were coming out. Must say, sure did like what I saw, and hope nobody is fibbing. Always makes my heart hurt to see those seniors who have no one, and what happens to some. Last Christmas we went to the senior centers close by and did a little show all dressed up and passed out presents. Kinda tried to make it for them like it is for kids, full of smiles and magic. Yes, we check with the nutritionist for special diets before we planned the menu. Will definitely be doing it again next year.
And please, if you know of a senior who has no one, maybe you could be that someone, even once in a while. It really does make a difference in their lives.

I have one sister who won't help me do anything. The only reason she even comes around is the hope that my parents will give her everything. I just want to make sure my parents and myself are taken care of. I don't care about my sister anymore because of how she has done and how she has treated us. All she wants is the money, the house, the land, that is all she cares about. I am afraid that my parents will make her executor and not me because I am younger and my sister is the older one. If she does get it all, I will literally have nothing. All I have is my car that I own and nothing else. My parents help me out with living arrangements and such. That's what family is supposed to do. When it comes down to it, I want to be executor to make sure my parents and myslef is taken care of. Plus, (sadly) my sister will get her share. They are her parents too, so she has to get something. But right now, it's all up in the air and I am at a loss of what to do because I don't own my own house to let my parents move in with me and I don't have that kind of moeny to take care of them like they need to be. I belive that they do have a pretty good savings and I could take care of them good with that, but I am not excutor over their estate. So, if something happens to them right now, I don't know what I would do. If you have any suggestions, let me know. Especially concerning on how to deal with my sister. countrysiderivergal@yahoo.com

Sorry, but your posts sounds like you are the one worrying about how much you are going to get. Already said they are pretty much supporting them. Very disappointed that this was about taking care of parents and you are worried about YOUR being taken care of.
So no, not going to answer your questions.