my point exactly.... why couldnt you have dated someone... not necessarily THE ONE but someone to enjoy good times with, have fun and share experiences?
is it an ALL OR NOTHING type scenario for yall????
well.... i understand the concept of knowing "bad" is important so we know to appreciate the "good" ... still, emotionally speaking, not getting worked up by all those bad things is preferrable than getting stressed and thus unable to cope... hence why controlling your emotions would be beneficial !!!!
those who've i've seen that are unable to cope are generally those who never prepared themselves for bad experiences and thus became emotionally overwhelmed when it happened....
and you dont have to experience something to be mentally and emotionally prepared... you can do so by "visualizing" events and your subsequent response !!!
Im starting to think im rather unique up in here.... so i know 3 dudes in particular who have been married, had kids and been subsequently divorced....
one of them remained single for about a year, then found a chick and is now engaged... he is (in my view) the smartest one as he is actually taking his time and ensuring he dont marry another member of the Evil Empire... but the other two...
well.. one is going for wife #3 and the other is already working on #5... its like they are having a competition or something... i've known them for about 10 years now and in that time, i'd be surprised if they have a combined 1 year of single status
and thats just the dudes.... i know women that were remarried just months after a divorce !!!
... and then there are those in here who are proud to tell us all that they traveled, they met, they copulated and now they are getting hitched !!!
then you read the forums and online profiles and all you see is... "im looking for the man/woman of my dreams" "im ready for a long lasting relationship" "i want a husband/wife" .... blah blah blah....
are yall really THAT hard up for company???? am i the only one that reads that and thinks CODEPENDENT????? What ever happened to going out having fun and letting things SLOWLY run their course????
im sorry, but i just see that as a sign of desperation... and i dont do desperate... i guess that's why i cant see online dating ever working for me.... if a chick mentions marriage within the first 2 years of dating IM OUT !!!
more importantly, is there ANYONE there who would not be opposed to just being in a relationship with someone (permanently) with no marriage intentions?????
im not depressed about not having the "what ifs" or "if only's"... im quite happy with what "is" ... but that dont stop me from trying to get some of those "what if's and if only's"....
desire means wanting something.... and wanting something is what drives us to getting it... the problem is when people go about getting it the wrong way (i.e. criminals)...
bottom line is if you are content with what you have, then you get complacent and never try to get more... until one day you wake up and realize that your life could have been soooo much fuller and better !!!!!
for example... if im content laying pipe to one chick only... then im complacent, then she gets chunky, things get boring, monotonous, and soon we are getting it on only at 8 o'clock on wednesdays....
instead, if i keep looking for a better lay, i stay in shape (thus healthier), go out, socialize, have fun and get it on with different hot chicks regularly !!!!
yet at the same time its at the root of all happines... for if we didnt desire a better life or knowledge or a family or to be healthy then we'll all be dumb, fat and lazy and spend our entire days on CS or something !!!!!
well.... we know somewhat where this took place (at least the state and city) but we dont know who yet... so why dont you share names, places, and specific information so that when you testify in court, the defense attorney can tear you apart and impeach your testimony for disclosing facts about a criminal investigation and potentially violating the suspects rights????????
good god... dont yall have a clue that some things are better kept private?????? at least for a while?????
hey,,,, i take offense to that .... we (players) dont ALL lie.... some of us will tell yall straight up "im not getting attached im only here for the fun, the moment you get vlingy or no longer fun.. im out"
again... im not talking about sharing with those close to you... that is not only normal but important....
im just talking in general... with strangers or people you barely know... just read the forums in here and its amazing what people will share !!!!
yet when someone choses NOT to share his/her feelings... they are automatically called something or other and accused of having "issues".... why cant they just accept that said person is simply not the kind who shares personal feelings with anyone ????
agreed.... but i believe that it is just as good to be able to control postive emotions as well ..... i guess that's my point in here....
it is socially acceptable to control negative feelings yet it is not socially acceptable to control positive ones.... i just think that BOTH should be acceptable !!!!!
agreed.... but i believe that it is just as good to be able to control postive emotions as well ..... i guess that's my point in here....
it is socially acceptable to control negative feelings yet it is not socially acceptable to control positive ones.... i just think that BOTH should be acceptable !!!!!
i see your point and do agree with most of it.... i think we are just getting caught in the semantics of it.... i am not referring to people who hold their feelings in ALWAYS... im simply referring to those who are more "reserved" in the generally perceived sense.... telling my boss he is an idiot is not an emotional outburst... its an untactful, yet factual exchange (so long as he IS an idiot)... i just think that being able to control your emotions has its benefits.... and its drawbacks of course, but so long as you are aware of them and can live with the consequences (less likely to have friends/meaningful relationships and such).....
MetalMilitia Forum Posts (576)
Marriage and Relationships
yeah... i know kids change everything.... trust me !!!!but that still dont mean that you have to take a vow of celibacy and resort to just be miserable and never do anything on account of them...
you can still have fun and even date without involving your kids with the person and without expecting him/her to be THE ONE !!!!