What am I still doing here?

Well, here I am signing in and out of online dating sites so that, at the very least, searches will show I've been online recently and haven't given up and left. But I think I have given up. It's not working for me, and probably never will. Whether it's online or offline the dating game is a brutal affair. Why should I bludgeon myself any further?

On a possible unrelated note I saw too late that comments had been posted on my other blog entries. A pleasant surprise. I forget that people can always surprise you! People are very different and have very different reasons or motivations for joining an online dating site. You may be looking for something very different to what I'm looking for. Some want physical relationships, some want long-term loving relationships, and some of those want to get married. Some are looking for companionship through witty banter - I get that :)

All I know is I feel I need a woman!!! I want to meet 'the one' and share that mutual love and understanding which I believe exists. Sometimes, that desire seems to lose the energy I think it derives from the instinctual urges - I think you know the ones I mean. Then, the storm is calmed and I find I don't need the woman as much anymore.

Recently, I went to the shops and found some bargain items - I mean serious deal-of-the-century stuff. I bought every item I could get my hands on. Other customers paying at the tills were eyeing me enviously (I think). Then I decided to cruise to all the same stores looking for the same bargain that I'd found at this particular store. I didn't find any; not one other store had the same items I had found before. Love is like that too, I think. If you go out of your way looking for it, you don't find it; it's like that bargain which must find you.

The thing is, I know there is no guarantee that the love I have always dreamed of is going to find me. It hasn't happened for a lot of people so why should I be so lucky?! I was even thinking of starting some kind of support group online: Longing-for-the-one-but-it's-taking-forever support group.

Now, if you think I can spout all this stuff and still put my pic up - you've gotta be kidding plus think of this scenario: A co-worker or someone you once knew recognizes your pic. They pose as whatever/ whoever on the dating site and manage to extract information (possibly even very intimate information)from you, which, if you had been talking face to face with them you would never consider revealing to them! So, why should I put up my pic? I know it's what people are looking for in their searches but is physical attractiveness so important to women - nu-uh, they are more attracted to wealth, status, reliability, warmth, and so on. I would reveal what I look like eventually to someone who I deem trustworthy enough. Some scammers are very patient and can work to gain your confidence over a year, perhaps more. So, would showing your pic to them a year after corresponding really still be safe? Does this sound like I'm being paranoid. Well, yeah, sure it does. I have never been diagnosed as such but I prefer always to err on the side of EXTREME caution but that's just me. I don't trust people. There's a bumper sticker I saw that said: 'Trust no one; love all.' Good advice, I reckon. Of course, how many people love Robert Mugabe!! :) Poor devil, I don't think he'll ever experience the joys of being loved and loving someone. I imagine he's lurking on some online dating site that the Zimbabwean people have paid very well for. I think we can all be sure he's not going to put his pic up! he he