I think I get it now! (60)
avecaimSan Jose, California USA9 Threads 1 Polls 4,084 PostsI would listen to her. Use your brain first...
------ This thread is Archived ------
AnnBrown: No, you are not the only one. I recently started dating someone from out of my town, about an hour away actually. That is not a great distance. At least, I didn't think so. He would say things like 'I would never usually date someone so far away, but I like you a lot'. That seemed so sweet and made me feel special. We really hit it off, sharing secrets, long phone conversations, etc... Suddenly, out of the blue, he went cold. He said the distance was too difficult, he felt guilty about it, blah, blah, blah. I really liked him, though, so I tried to understand how we could come up with a solution. In the end, I think he just doesn't know WHAT he wants, and when I look back a little, there were clues. At the time I ignored them because, like you, I didn't want to over anyalize. Boy, did I learn a lesson!
Good luck in future dates!
Tamra.
Good luck in future dates!
Tamra.
We're about an hour apart too. But I don't think it really bothers him, as he travels quite a bit with his jobs. I knew I had done this wrong the next day. But when I didn't hear from him, my head filled with thoughts. We're working on it. I don't think it's hopeless at all.
------ This thread is Archived ------
sweetowen: I've often wondered why it is that we women seem to analyze everything men to TO DEATH. I can't stand when I start to analyze everything. But with events that have happened to me over the weekend (I'll not go into full detail here), I've come to understand, at least partially, why we do!
We tend to over-analyze because when we do something wrong, men clam up & won't talk to let us know exactly what it is that we've done wrong. If we don't know, we can't work on changing it, now can we?
Am I the only one who feels like this?
We tend to over-analyze because when we do something wrong, men clam up & won't talk to let us know exactly what it is that we've done wrong. If we don't know, we can't work on changing it, now can we?
Am I the only one who feels like this?
(coughing)... hey hun...
I don't know any man that won't tell you what he thinks that you may have done wrong...JMO
------ This thread is Archived ------
Tater: (coughing)... hey hun... I don't know any man that won't tell you what he thinks that you may have done wrong...JMO
Yes, but don't you have another thread floating around about being told you're too blunt?
------ This thread is Archived ------
sweetowen: Yes, but don't you have another thread floating around about being told you're too blunt?
who ME!!!
<---------- that guy right there....
not that I'm aware of..------ This thread is Archived ------
For my two cents of advice I would back off and let him make the next more. Give him a couple of days and see what happens. If he really likes you, he will come around. If he don't, move on!
Call or text him on Thursday....
Call or text him on Thursday....
------ This thread is Archived ------
Big_John: For my two cents of advice I would back off and let him make the next more. Give him a couple of days and see what happens. If he really likes you, he will come around. If he don't, move on!
Call or text him on Thursday....
Call or text him on Thursday....
That's exactly what I'm doing. We're still sending non-personal emails back & forth. I'm just going to lay low & let him make the next move. As I said, I've put it out there. He knows how I feel. In his response to me today, he told me what was bothering him, but didn't say whether or not he wants to continue seeing me. But I have a good feeling about it. I just need to back off. Those who know me here know that I'm very good at that.
------ This thread is Archived ------
sweetowen: That's exactly what I'm doing. We're still sending non-personal emails back & forth. I'm just going to lay low & let him make the next move. As I said, I've put it out there. He knows how I feel. In his response to me today, he told me what was bothering him, but didn't say whether or not he wants to continue seeing me. But I have a good feeling about it. I just need to back off. Those who know me here know that I'm very good at that.
Good luck Sweet. I hope it works out
------ This thread is Archived ------
sweetowen: That's exactly what I'm doing. We're still sending non-personal emails back & forth. I'm just going to lay low & let him make the next move. As I said, I've put it out there. He knows how I feel. In his response to me today, he told me what was bothering him, but didn't say whether or not he wants to continue seeing me. But I have a good feeling about it. I just need to back off. Those who know me here know that I'm very good at that.
Well sweetowen, the good thing is that you communicated everything that was on your mind. If you can handle backing off and not knowing if he wants to continue or not, then that's cool.
He did tell you what was bothering him, but I don't think he wants to stop seeing you. I'm sure he would have told you that straight up if that was the case. True, maybe he does need some space for whatever happened, I just hope that it's not a situation where he is expecting you to call him while you are expecting him to call you...lot of weird thoughts and assumed futures can happen in that time in which verbal talk is the best way to unpack things.
Good luck with all of this and to be honest, this may seem like a bad sign if this is happening this early in the relationship...
------ This thread is Archived ------
Wow! I'm really getting some good insight from all you guys! I REALLY appreciate it! 
Just a note, SF... I truly was in the wrong here. I'd be honest & say he has a bit of a problem if I thought I wasn't totally to blame. I even texted him first thing yesterday morning & apologized.
Just a note, SF... I truly was in the wrong here. I'd be honest & say he has a bit of a problem if I thought I wasn't totally to blame. I even texted him first thing yesterday morning & apologized.
------ This thread is Archived ------
..........Hmmmmm....I will just listen to the Ladies comments on this one......
J.D
J.D
------ This thread is Archived ------
Tater: true, I think I would of only gotten 3rd place at best...
theres always next year
------ This thread is Archived ------
sweetowen: I've often wondered why it is that we women seem to analyze everything men do TO DEATH. I can't stand when I start to analyze everything. But with events that have happened to me over the weekend (I'll not go into full detail here), I've come to understand, at least partially, why we do!
We tend to over-analyze because when we do something wrong, men clam up & won't talk to let us know exactly what it is that we've done wrong. If we don't know, we can't work on changing it, now can we?
Am I the only one who feels like this?
We tend to over-analyze because when we do something wrong, men clam up & won't talk to let us know exactly what it is that we've done wrong. If we don't know, we can't work on changing it, now can we?
Am I the only one who feels like this?
I used to do this. I don't anymore. I've learned to just go with the flow, and not have to analyze everything. It's easier that way. And I've learned that if he clams up and won't talk, it's not necessarily because I did anything...it's just how he is at that time. He'll talk when he's ready. Until then, I go on. I love a Cancer...if I didn't learn this, I'd drive myself crazy.
------ This thread is Archived ------
sweetowen: Nah, nothing really juicy or exciting. I just made a pest of myself. I annoyed him & reminded him of something in his past. But without knowing exactly what I did wrong, how am I to do better?
Owen, that isn't necessarily something that should be considered "bad"...you didn't know. Now you do. Space/closeness issues are something that need to be worked out in any relationship, especially if the two in it have different needs. Hopefully, in that case, middle ground can be achieved. And yes, I know you're good at giving anyone their space when they need it. I hope this works out for you...but if not, it wasn't meant to be. Love is rarely easy.
------ This thread is Archived ------
druidess6308: Owen, that isn't necessarily something that should be considered "bad"...you didn't know. Now you do. Space/closeness issues are something that need to be worked out in any relationship, especially if the two in it have different needs. Hopefully, in that case, middle ground can be achieved.
And yes, I know you're good at giving anyone their space when they need it. I hope this works out for you...but if not, it wasn't meant to be. Love is rarely easy.
And yes, I know you're good at giving anyone their space when they need it. I hope this works out for you...but if not, it wasn't meant to be. Love is rarely easy.
Thanks dru. Your advice is heeded. Letting him alone.
------ This thread is Archived ------
sweetowen: Thanks dru. Your advice is heeded. Letting him alone.
Are y'all communicating at all right now?
------ This thread is Archived ------
Big_John: Are y'all communicating at all right now?
Nope. I won't call him. I've said my piece. He knows how I feel. If he calls, we'll take it from there. If not, time to move on.
------ This thread is Archived ------
sweetowen: Nope. I won't call him. I've said my piece. He knows how I feel. If he calls, we'll take it from there. If not, time to move on.
I think this is the right approach. Hard, but right.------ This thread is Archived ------
Big_John: I think this is the right approach. Hard, but right.
Mama didn't raise no fool!
------ This thread is Archived ------
sweetowen: Nope. I won't call him. I've said my piece. He knows how I feel. If he calls, we'll take it from there. If not, time to move on.
Of course you will, whatever it is you did, but it is up to him to come to you, really??
Already given up huh, perhaps he is waiting to see if you think he is worth going out of your comfort zone, on your timelimit, on your agenda, and make his of equal or more importance.
But that would mean giving up complete control, and heaven forbid who does that today?????
Heaven forbid
------ This thread is Archived ------
This Thread is Archived
This Thread is archived, so you will no longer be able to post to it. Threads get archived automatically when they are older than 3 months.
« Go back to All Threads
« Go back to All Threads
More Threads
s*xual skills
The GOP Representatives owned by Vladimir Putin
More Proof The GOP is a Criminal Organization
wanting beyond need
Would you hire this guy - for any job?
men's perspective towards women
Democrats destroyed America
Ladies
Kultur-multur
Unions support Democrats!
More Threads
Report threads that break rules, are offensive, or contain fighting. Staff may not be aware of the forum abuse, and cannot do anything about it unless you tell us about it. click to report forum abuse »
If one of the comments is offensive, please report the comment instead (there is a link in each comment to report it).
If one of the comments is offensive, please report the comment instead (there is a link in each comment to report it).