Is marriage at risk? (75)
ObscuritanMelbourne, Victoria Australia37 Threads 3 Polls 1,284 PostsSo you think I captured it pretty well, LalaSierra?
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jac379: Hello, You.
Are you able to clarify the OP's questions?
Howdy Jac. It's been a while, eh? Are you able to clarify the OP's questions?
I'll try to put it all into perspective of how I viewed the questions...
"Is marriage at risk?"
Alone, this question makes me wonder if there's really a threat of marriage (the joining of two people as one) becoming abolished/abandoned/condemned for whatever the reason may be.
"Who will model loving, committed relationships in a world of single adults?"
Alone, this question begs to be answered with a question...
If all that's left in the world is single adults, are we now
modeling a loving, committed relatonship soley with ourselves?
Who else could we model it with if we're all single?
(I know, it was never mentioned that "all that's left.." in the question, but having "a world of single adults" tends to imply such.)
Pairing both questions together...
"Is marriage at risk? Who will model loving, committed relationships in a world of single adults?"
Sounds like a straight-forward question to me. If there are more and more singles in the world, and more and more are shunning marriage (for whatever reasons that may be) then I would think that marriage could be at risk of becoming very rare, perhaps a minority.
There would be fewer people to model loving, committed relationships.
I look at "model" as being an example to be passed on to future generations. We model our morals, our kindness, even our angers and hatred that our young'un's pick up on and take with them into adulthood. If our children are not picking up on loving, committed relationships, then more than likely they will not carry that into their adulthood, nor pass it along to further generations.
And now my brain hurts.
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Obscuritan: So you think I captured it pretty well, LalaSierra?
Yes I do, thank you.
I commend you for being such a brave soldier and risking being eaten alive by the piranhas!
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Obscuritan: Oh well, I'll have a go. Reading between the lines, I think her question sort of goes like this:
Marriage, as a tradition, an institution, a way of setting up your life; is it "at risk" ie, will it die out?
The possible reason the OP feels it could be at risk is that "the world is full of single adults" and therefore children growing up don't have that way of life "modelled" for them, and therefore are less likely to follow that path themselves.
Marriage, as a tradition, an institution, a way of setting up your life; is it "at risk" ie, will it die out?
The possible reason the OP feels it could be at risk is that "the world is full of single adults" and therefore children growing up don't have that way of life "modelled" for them, and therefore are less likely to follow that path themselves.
Thank you, obscuritan, but the world isn't full of single people.
Its full of people, some of whom are single, some of whom are married, some of whom have other relationship formats.
I can see that my daughter could have gained from witnessing first hand a happy, healthy relationship between two adults while she was growing up, but that's not the only way to develop the skills necessary to be happy and healthy.
Witnessing a marriage first hand isn't necessarily key to learning healthy relationship skills, nor is it the only influence upon people's behaviours and cognitions in this area.
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jac379: Thank you, obscuritan, but the world isn't full of single people.
Its full of people, some of whom are single, some of whom are married, some of whom have other relationship formats.
I can see that my daughter could have gained from witnessing first hand a happy, healthy relationship between two adults while she was growing up, but that's not the only way to develop the skills necessary to be happy and healthy.
Witnessing a marriage first hand isn't necessarily key to learning healthy relationship skills, nor is it the only influence upon people's behaviours and cognitions in this area.
Its full of people, some of whom are single, some of whom are married, some of whom have other relationship formats.
I can see that my daughter could have gained from witnessing first hand a happy, healthy relationship between two adults while she was growing up, but that's not the only way to develop the skills necessary to be happy and healthy.
Witnessing a marriage first hand isn't necessarily key to learning healthy relationship skills, nor is it the only influence upon people's behaviours and cognitions in this area.
The question is 'IF' the world is full of single adults, not that it IS.
No one implied that marriage is the right or wrong way or only way to be in a loving, committed relationship.
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Ccincy: lala I'm having a blonde moment here and I totally don't understand your question.
Can't someone be in a love committed relationship without being married?
How is that possible if they're supposed to be single? Can we actually have both? Being single and in a loving, committed relationship?Can't someone be in a love committed relationship without being married?
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lalasierra: The question is 'IF' the world is full of single adults, not that it IS.
The question you asked is 'IN a world of single adults?' That means in the world you envision the world IS full of single adults.
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Maus19: The question you asked is 'IN a world of single adults?' That means in the world you envision the world IS full of single adults.
And here I was looking at it as a hypothetical question. ------ This thread is Archived ------
YouMeUs: Howdy Jac. It's been a while, eh?
Its good to see you, as ever.
YouMeUs: I'll try to put it all into perspective of how I viewed the questions...
"Is marriage at risk?"
Alone, this question makes me wonder if there's really a threat of marriage (the joining of two people as one) becoming abolished/abandoned/condemned for whatever the reason may be.
"Is marriage at risk?"
Alone, this question makes me wonder if there's really a threat of marriage (the joining of two people as one) becoming abolished/abandoned/condemned for whatever the reason may be.
Alone, This question makes me wonder why its important to maintain something which might not be everybody's choice. It makes me wonder why its deemed more important by some than a happy, healthy relationship, whether married, or not. It makes me wonder if the institution, the paperwork is deemed more important than the content, or action.
YouMeUs: "Who will model loving, committed relationships in a world of single adults?"
Alone, this question begs to be answered with a question...
If all that's left in the world is single adults, are we now
modeling a loving, committed relatonship soley with ourselves?
Who else could we model it with if we're all single?
(I know, it was never mentioned that "all that's left.." in the question, but having "a world of single adults" tends to imply such.)
Alone, this question begs to be answered with a question...
If all that's left in the world is single adults, are we now
modeling a loving, committed relatonship soley with ourselves?
Who else could we model it with if we're all single?
(I know, it was never mentioned that "all that's left.." in the question, but having "a world of single adults" tends to imply such.)
Yes, the wording of the qustion does imply such, and as such its a false premiss. That somewhat negates the debate, which is why I, and perhaps others, were asking for clarification.
YouMeUs: Pairing both questions together...
"Is marriage at risk? Who will model loving, committed relationships in a world of single adults?"
Sounds like a straight-forward question to me.
"Is marriage at risk? Who will model loving, committed relationships in a world of single adults?"
Sounds like a straight-forward question to me.
Except its based upon at least one false premiss, possibly two...
YouMeUs: If there are more and more singles in the world, and more and more are shunning marriage (for whatever reasons that may be) then I would think that marriage could be at risk of becoming very rare, perhaps a minority.
There would be fewer people to model loving, committed relationships.
There would be fewer people to model loving, committed relationships.
...followed by the leap of logic necessary to answer questions based upon false premises.
Fewer people being married doesn't necessarily mean people won't have happy, healthy relationships. Its possible more people might have happy, healthy relationships in a future without marriage. It possible an increase in the number of single people is part of a process regarding learning how to have happy, healthy relationships, rather than be trapped in misery for the whole of one's adult life as sometimes, perhaps often, happened when life-long marriage was expected as the social norm.
YouMeUs: I look at "model" as being an example to be passed on to future generations. We model our morals, our kindness, even our angers and hatred that our young'un's pick up on and take with them into adulthood. If our children are not picking up on loving, committed relationships, then more than likely they will not carry that into their adulthood, nor pass it along to further generations.
And now my brain hurts.
And now my brain hurts.
As I said in an earlier post, the skills required to have happy healthy relationships aren't necessarily only learned by the example of marriage; witnessing a marriage doesn't necessarily lead to learning those skills;& there are other influences upon children which may impact upon their ability to have happy, healthy relationships with others as adults.
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YouMeUs: How is that possible if they're supposed to be single? Can we actually have both? Being single and in a loving, committed relationship?
I was referring to two people who are living together without marriage.
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I already confirmed that Obscuritan clearly understood and clarified. Still some are trying to twist and confuse.
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lalasierra: The question is 'IF' the world is full of single adults, not that it IS.
No one implied that marriage is the right or wrong way or only way to be in a loving, committed relationship.
No one implied that marriage is the right or wrong way or only way to be in a loving, committed relationship.
This was your original question:
lalasierra: Who will model loving, committed relationships in a world of single adults?
Given your clarification now appears to be that your question is hypothetical, that if everyone in the world was single, then surely there would be no marriage for it to be at risk?
Alternatively, the different slant created by 'if' instead of 'in' might be viewed from a point where there was no marriage - unless you believe that God created Adam and Eve and arranged their marriage.
Assuming people have evolved and weren't born married, marriage must have developed, ergo, if there was to be no marriage, or relationships at all, it may well develop again as an institution.
Having said all that, I'm still not sure what exactly you're trying to explore with this thread, Lala.
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jac379: This was your original question:
Given your clarification now appears to be that your question is hypothetical, that if everyone in the world was single, then surely there would be no marriage for it to be at risk?
Alternatively, the different slant created by 'if' instead of 'in' might be viewed from a point where there was no marriage - unless you believe that God created Adam and Eve and arranged their marriage.
Assuming people have evolved and weren't born married, marriage must have developed, ergo, if there was to be no marriage, or relationships at all, it may well develop again as an institution.
Having said all that, I'm still not sure what exactly you're trying to explore with this thread, Lala.
Given your clarification now appears to be that your question is hypothetical, that if everyone in the world was single, then surely there would be no marriage for it to be at risk?
Alternatively, the different slant created by 'if' instead of 'in' might be viewed from a point where there was no marriage - unless you believe that God created Adam and Eve and arranged their marriage.
Assuming people have evolved and weren't born married, marriage must have developed, ergo, if there was to be no marriage, or relationships at all, it may well develop again as an institution.
Having said all that, I'm still not sure what exactly you're trying to explore with this thread, Lala.
Read Obscuritan's post. He summed it up pretty well.
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lalasierra: I already confirmed that Obscuritan clearly understood and clarified. Still some are trying to twist and confuse.
Obscuritan: Oh well, I'll have a go. Reading between the lines, I think her question sort of goes like this:
Marriage, as a tradition, an institution, a way of setting up your life; is it "at risk" ie, will it die out?
The possible reason the OP feels it could be at risk is that "the world is full of single adults" and therefore children growing up don't have that way of life "modelled" for them, and therefore are less likely to follow that path themselves.
Marriage, as a tradition, an institution, a way of setting up your life; is it "at risk" ie, will it die out?
The possible reason the OP feels it could be at risk is that "the world is full of single adults" and therefore children growing up don't have that way of life "modelled" for them, and therefore are less likely to follow that path themselves.
lalasierra: The question is 'IF' the world is full of single adults, not that it IS.
Maybe people are just confused at your apparent change of heart?
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No, commitment and marriage will ultimately go up. The future is not going to be like now. It's clear from the economy, the environment and from the fabric of society itself that we can't carry on in the juvenile fashion of our craggy age bent on failure and feebleness.
My theory is that the west lost too many good men during the world wars and the survivors were so happy to be alive that they spoiled their own kids. Meaning the better genetics didn't get passed on to the next generation and parenting lost much of its meaning and purpose. This is what's responsible for the 1960's and everything since. Now, we await with bated breath the rejuvenating flames of the cleansing apocalypse.
My theory is that the west lost too many good men during the world wars and the survivors were so happy to be alive that they spoiled their own kids. Meaning the better genetics didn't get passed on to the next generation and parenting lost much of its meaning and purpose. This is what's responsible for the 1960's and everything since. Now, we await with bated breath the rejuvenating flames of the cleansing apocalypse.
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lalasierra: Who will model loving, committed relationships in a world of single adults?
traditional marriages, as we see it, is gone already, as we turn more individualistic, obsessed by “fast life”, volatile, and egoistic. it is an interesting paradox, as we all want more egalitarian, companionate and romantic relationships.
i also think excessive divorce rates make couples believe their changes of a long-term marriage are less than what they really are, and it has to do with the way we grow into or society turns out to be.
the key to marital success is that both partner are happy with their roles and feel respected by their partners. .. respect for each other, independent of what we are/want/think.. but marriage/relationship will be at risk as always...
also, i am surprised at how much impact hollywood seems to have on what people believed to be true…but that's another issue..
that’s what i believe. and sanity also…
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jac379: Maybe people are just confused at your apparent change of heart?
WTF are you talking about now? Some of the things you come up with are delusional.
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jac379: Its good to see you, as ever.
Alone, This question makes me wonder why its important to maintain something which might not be everybody's choice. It makes me wonder why its deemed more important by some than a happy, healthy relationship, whether married, or not. It makes me wonder if the institution, the paperwork is deemed more important than the content, or action.
Flipping the coin here...Alone, This question makes me wonder why its important to maintain something which might not be everybody's choice. It makes me wonder why its deemed more important by some than a happy, healthy relationship, whether married, or not. It makes me wonder if the institution, the paperwork is deemed more important than the content, or action.
Should it not be important to anyone who deems marriage as being important? Should they be scrutinized by anyone who doesn't subscribe to marriage or the contents that make up such an institution? The same should apply to those who choose to live together, or choose to remain single. But I failed to see where being 'more important' was ever implied in the initial question by the OP.
jac379: Fewer people being married doesn't necessarily mean people won't have happy, healthy relationships. Its possible more people might have happy, healthy relationships in a future without marriage. It possible an increase in the number of single people is part of a process regarding learning how to have happy, healthy relationships, rather than be trapped in misery for the whole of one's adult life as sometimes, perhaps often, happened when life-long marriage was expected as the social norm.
We seem to have omitted a key operative word from the initial question. That word being "committed.""loving, committed relationship"
Is it possible that some are shunning marriage because they do not wish to commit themselves to another? Or is commitment no longer necessary in a meaningful relationship?
jac379: As I said in an earlier post, the skills required to have happy healthy relationships aren't necessarily only learned by the example of marriage; witnessing a marriage doesn't necessarily lead to learning those skills;& there are other influences upon children which may impact upon their ability to have happy, healthy relationships with others as adults.
Which brings us back to the initial question... "Is marriage at risk?" It appears you have answered the question, Jac.
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jac379: What is your futuristic concept of marriage from a legal viewpoint?
well, in case of divorce ,the Women gets nothing and she has to pay alimony
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Wow, another spoiled thread...
No, I doubt that marriage is at risk...most people go for it whether is for the right or wrong reason. Whether is because of love or because of the show.
In our so called modern world it seems to be very difficult to create and maintain a healthy, long, loving relationship. People are more selfish and led by their own motives only, compassion and sacrifice are out of use. JMO
No, I doubt that marriage is at risk...most people go for it whether is for the right or wrong reason. Whether is because of love or because of the show.
In our so called modern world it seems to be very difficult to create and maintain a healthy, long, loving relationship. People are more selfish and led by their own motives only, compassion and sacrifice are out of use. JMO
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