get a grip, People!! ( Archived) (112)

Hi Woody.

I can see your point and I agree with what you are saying.

What I agree with about the original post is that Ship is stating that we see it all the time.

That people display love will shine all the time. If it did, places like this would not exist.

Like you, when it happens, it will conquer all.

But looking for it, believing that it will, whilst looking for it, is a dream.

There are people who believe in all what the OP has stated, and nothing else, reality goes out of the window, which is easy to do when you are on a place like this.

I am neither a believer or a non believer in love at first sight, nor all the other examples that were mentioned, if it happens it happens, I am in a relationship, a good, close loving one, we are friends, lovers, partners in many ways and I am happy. But I am no fool, I expect what I expect as he does.

I travel to be with my man, I love the going to see him bit, on the plane knowing he will be at the other end, I was always prepared to travel.

But all of that is easy to say now, before it was not.

I do not think Ship is jaded, I just think he knows what he is about, whether I agree with him or not is irrelevant and frankly I am sure he does not care. But he is who is and that is fine by me. His opinions and choices of the way he lives and thinks, does not change the fact that he is a nice man, I think he is and I also think he has raised excellent points on being realistic about life and love.

Hope you are well and I think I read that you had found yourself a girl. The best of British to you both.

This my friend could be a whole new thread!

Ice Princess, I disagree...falling in love is easy, the younger you are, the easier it is...

...making it work past the infatuation stage (3 months) is the hard part...jmo

Well I disagreee, respectfully.

I do not think there is a time limit, if it's meant for you, it will not go by you.

I do however, agree that it is harder as we become older, we are more set in our ways, surer of what we want. I certainly am.

I still bloody well love you though.

Oh

Good post.........

Some people believe that if they meet 'the right person' everything will be all right and that their sad and lonely lives will be transformed. This just isn't true!

Expecting way too much of another person's ability to make a sad life 'whole' is totally unfair. It's also the reason that many people seem to suffer so much when they 'lose' somebody that they claim to love so much.

'I can't live without you' equates to 'I should curl up and die as I am totally useless.'

You have to put yourself in the other person's position. Are you going to transform another person's life so that they won't be able to live without you? How yuck!

We all need to develop as individuals so that we feel good about ourselves and then meet somebody who feels good too. A clinging 'no good on my own' person is going to bring down a positive person and two losers will make an even greater losing combination!

The only relationships that really work are where both parties have something more than 'clingy love' - where they the two can develop both as individuals AND as a partnership that makes them both lucky to have each other!

Hey ship, that's that

Well, I did tried my best not to reply to this thread but as you can see ,,, I failed. So, I’ll try to be brief and strait to the point:

You know in my culture we have a line of a poetry which is as much as I can to translate it by:

The eyes of acceptance see only the goodness of those they accept while the eyes of denial see only badness of those they deny.

So you see it is the first notion we have as humans is acceptance unless you are a pessimistic. Therefore, we could give the same answers as you did above especially the woman which they are more human than men. Please don’t ask me why?? cause it will take more to explain just trust me in this.

However, down the road when we meet someone who we hope he or she could be the so-called soul mate, the realization of acceptance or denial take control then our answers changes accordingly.

So, please my friend take it easy,, it is a simple fact of life to hold on to acceptance (love) which take us to this website and other means of communication to look for this so-called soul mate. Then, we face another fact of life that reveals the true acceptance, which is reflected upon this so-called soul mate OR simply denial by either you or this so-called soul mate, which is also presented by what our eyes see physically and emotionally which is finally we call it chemistry.


IMHO, the main issue is compromise which becomes harder as we grow older. The concept of win-win situation (compromise) becomes more like the Japanese one which is lose-lose situation. This is why they used to commit suicide literally when that happens while we commit suicide emotionally.


So, my advice to you all including myself, is always keep your hopes up especially you women. I truly know that it is harder on women much much much more than men.


Just do your best and if (God forbids) you could not find the one??? then at least you had the pleasure of taking this journey of looking and meeting others here and there.


Best of luck for everybody including myself

My gawd! I always thought I was a pretty good "word man", but the stabbing honesty of this post was almost pure poetry. Bravo, sir... Bravo!!!

(Now where the hell is my Dana for a quickie in the breakroom closet..!!!!!???? )