‘Wife!,' cried the impatient husband. ‘Fetch me my boots, I have friends I need to meet.’

Fetch them yourself, thought the wife, as she delivered them to his feet.

‘Wife!,' cried the greedy husband. ‘Get me food, for my hunger must be satisfied.’

You big fat oaf, thought the wife, as she hastily complied.

‘Wife!,' cried the lazy husband. ‘There’s cold beer in the fridge, I want it now, without delay.’

I should ram this bottle down your throat, thought the wife, as she set it down upon a tray.

‘Wife!,' cried the lustful husband. ‘Bring me your body, I need it underneath me until my urge subsides.’

You disgusting pig, thought the wife, as she lay down by his side.

‘Wife,' mumbled the half sleeping husband. ‘Move over, you’re taking up too much bed.’

Sleep tight, screamed the wife, as she brought the hammer hard down upon his head.