Why aren't men constant in their behaviour with women ? ( Archived) (76)

Its a funny thing....if you treat someone badly they will treat you badly. if someone treats you badly and you treat them nice, they seem to change and be nicer. Of course...the self centered people only take the more you give.

There is an old story of a mountain man coming to a town to find the most beautiful woman in town to marry. He finds a plain woman and marrys her. He opened the doors for her, helped her into the wagon, talked to everyone about how sweet and pretty she was. Then they left town. The following year a woman comes to town and she is a beautiful woman, a perfection of beauty and grace with a sweetness unmatched by any. The whole town was a buzz about who this woman was. She must be a Queen of some royal line. Later that day the mountain man came up to her in his wagon. He gets off the wagon and takes the ladys hand, kissed her cheek and said, "My dear precious one, it is time to be heading home." He helped her into the wagon and they left. It was the same woman. He indeed had found the most beautiful and sweetest woman in town..................or did he make her so?

I know women are not always the same .... we are moody too ok !! I know that. But from my experience, men sometimes contradict themselves by their behaviour. Sometimes they are sweet and caring, take care of us women, pay the restaurant or bar, are helpful, talk soft, with caresses etc etc. Then, we meet another day maybe 3 days later, and the same caring person, is just a stone, doesn't talk much, doesn;t want anything, its like he is just existing. Not caring, not sweet, just like friends only. This is the thing i can't understand !!!!!!!!!

Maybe they are moody?

Let's face it, men are just dogs....



...no, that's not right either...a dog is always glad to see you...

Why ?? :-(

its the type of men that women going after, if you go to bed with dogs your gonna get fleas

Not at all.

professor: Only cause you asked for details if other...
*Just an insight into me...I love reading these posts because they make me think and keep open-minded. Before I was cerebral to survive, now I (try to anyhow) use my brain to live, learn and thrive and to deter my thinking from becoming dogmatic.

Can't speak for all men, just me:
Whether self-centred (only I matter) or self-focused (I matter too), it's all about reciprocity and psychology 101. What I mean is I think if I'm nice I get nice back, but, as self-centred this giving and getting must be immediate or I regress emotionally and think I'm wasting my efforts. Problem is, as we all have changing moods and cannot be black and white emotion or mood-wise, I always find the anti-mood to my self-centredness, and things go awry.
When self-focused and empathically/intuitively attuned, I know my efforts have a cumulative affect, I seek to know how I may be perceived by the person I'm with and I know, both, that I'm not wasting my time, but the other person may feel differently.

Botton-Line: my behaviour, and the behaviour of others, becomes more predictable/constant if I surround myself by supportive others, get my head out of my butt and start asking what can I do to/for others...and how may this knowledge affect/harm them?

I hope this doesn't sound too preachy......not my intent, just sharing MY experiences and self-observations.

Just a footnote from a sometimes human and moody idiot....thought I'd add that I've noticed, at least with a lot of women I've talked to about it, that they have the same sweet and caring and statuesque qualities, but also find life and relations are awesome when we remember that we like how we are when we're with the persons we love...JMO
Cheers;
Mark

That is very true Len.
Cause like I was always a nice person until my last marriage my husband begun to be abusive. Well over time I could feel anger and low self esteem from it all.

So sure it would work to treat someone so kindly and sweetly that they become sweet and beautiful cause they will have developed a better self esteem and love inside from it all.

Woment are not consistent either! Women are terrible at changing their minds and opinions. Where did the saying of "Its a woman's preogative to change her mind", come from?

It may be that the testosterone that day is running low.

whole hog....?

Who knows.

Because dear they are men. That's is the way they are made.

We constantly strive to be as emotionally stable as women , but it's a high hurdle to top ...................

I still say it's the testosterone doing the tuning and the conducting.

Huh ? What ? Huh ?

It very well could be