Most adults, at some point, have puzzled over the apparent cruelty of children. What we fail to realize is that some of us (adults) grew out of the cruel phase (if we didn't bypass it all together in our youth). Some of us didn't outgrow that phase and never will. Some of us pretend we've outgrown it. And some of us take pleasure from hurting others.
Not giving in to the impulse to be snarky or mean or sarcastically cruel or just plain nasty is no easy feat. It requires the ability to think and feel and care about others. Unfortunately, some humans will never possess those abilities. We can only control our own actions and reactions to life. We have no control over how others will react to things we say or do, regardless of how hard we try to prevent offending others.
Anonymity breeds bravado. Hiding behind our electronic force field gives some of us the illusion of invincibility. We are humans, which means we have flaws and we make mistakes (ALL of us). We can only do our best to maintain control over ourselves and our reactions to the world around us.
Human perfection is one of the rare guaranteed impossibilities of life.
A cop stops a Harley for traveling faster than the posted speed limit, so he asks the biker his name.
'Fred,' he replies.
'Fred what?' the officer asks.
'Just Fred,' the man responds.
The officer is in a good mood and thinks he might just give the biker a break and, write him out a warning instead of a ticket. The officer then presses him for the last name.
The man tells him that he used to have a last name but lost it. The officer thinks that he has a nut case on his hands but plays along with it. 'Tell me, Fred, how did you lose your last name?'
The biker replies, 'It's a long story, so stay with me.' I was born Fred Johnson. I studied hard and got good grades.
When I got older, I realized that I wanted to be a doctor. I went through college, medical school, internship, residency, and finally got my degree, so I was Fred Johnson, MD. After a while I got bored being a doctor, so I decided to go back to school.
Dentistry was my dream! Got all the way through school, got my degree, so then I was Fred Johnson, MD, DDS.
Got bored doing dentistry, so I started fooling around with my assistant and she gave me VD, so now I was Fred Johnson, MD, DDS, with VD.
Well, the ADA found out about the VD, so they took away my DDS. Then I was Fred Johnson, MD, with VD. Then the AMA found out about the ADA taking away my DDS because of the VD, so they took away my MD leaving me as Fred Johnson with VD.
Then the VD took away my Johnson, so now I am just Fred.'
My computer doesn't have a specific brand name because I build my own systems from the components of my choosing. And I use an air mouse from gyration.com
Congrats on the new little one! You might want to get him home and observe him for a bit. A fitting name will come to you.
Quaker parakeets are adorable. If you plan on spending a ton of time interacting with him, he should do fine by himself. If you aren't going to be available multiple times a day for play time, you might want to get another for company for him. The bigger birds do well alone, but the smaller ones seem to have difficulty with it. By the same token, all exotic birds will do best with company.
Before I got into equine rescue, I was into bird rescue. At one point I had nearly 200 exotic birds of all kinds and sizes in my home. Most had been tormented to the point where they weren't fit company for humans, so they had playmates and were kept in the bird room. Most of the larger ones (macaw, cockatoo, amazons) were kept in the family room and had frequent play time with my family.
And don't let anyone tell you that your new addition can't talk. A friend of mine had a finch who talked and sang. I had many talking birds and they were more entertaining conversationalists than most of the people I knew.
I had a mobile phone when they were huge and heavy and called a bag phone. It was for emergencies. I got tired paying a monthly bill for something that got used once or twice a year.
Explain why it's a good thing to have. After seeing so many these days with their phone grafted to their face (or constantly wearing Blue Tooth), I don't think it's a good thing.
And why is it "required"? I've never understood that one. If it's so much of a requirement, what did people do before mobile phones?
My ex and I were married exactly 3 weeks after we met. We were together for 23 years. If my next relationship only lasts as long as that one, I'll be happy.
Some of the best times of my life were spent at a senior's home in my area when I was in my teens. I used to go there every Saturday just to visit with the residents. I'd spend the entire day listening to wonderful stories of train rides across the US, being the first family on the block to have a car or a television, living through wars and the Great Depression, the music, silent movies.
During my 20s I was driving several thousand miles alone to visit a friend. About 2/3 of the way to my destination I stopped at a little diner for lunch. It was very crowded. As I sat in the booth by myself, the waitress asked if I would mind some company from one of the regulars. A woman (probably in her 80s) sat with me. She had been coming to the diner for more than half her life and sometimes had difficulty getting a seat to enjoy her lunch. We got to chatting and ended up spending more than 4 hours exchanging stories, although I ended up just mostly listening. She was fascinating. The stories from her life thrilled me.
The wisdom of the ages can be entertaining and enlightening.
I roll my own because I can smoke 4 cartons a month for less than the price of one carton of name brand. I actually smoke less rolling my own because I hate rolling (I don't smoke 4 cartons a month anyway).
My youngest daughter managed a cigarette outlet for almost 2 years. After the last major price jump here in the US, my rolling supplies became almost as expensive as buying name brand cigarettes. She told me a secret. A lot of loose tobacco suppliers started labeling their product as pipe tobacco to avoid the major tax increases. My costs dropped again.
I basically lived as a hermit for most of the last 27 years. In my attempts to rejoin the land of the living I have made a number of disappointing discoveries. Words like commitment and dedication are slowly fading from our language for a lot of people. Along with words such as honesty, integrity, compassion, empathy, honor, etc.
We now live in a disposable society of instant gratification. It's all about "me, me, me". And the sense of entitlement has grown. Our search for perfection has become our number one priority. "I deserve perfection. I deserve the perfect mate (even if I do not exhibit such perfection myself). If my mate doesn't provide all my wants, needs, and desires, I'm gone. If our life together takes a turn for the worst, I'm gone because I deserve a perfect life."
Humans are forgetting that life is about give and take, compromise and sacrifice and even struggle at times. If we all become takers, society will crumble (worse than it already has). The problems are not caused by one gender or one generation or one group of people (media, government, lawmakers, employers, those with money, etc.)
I hold out hope for the human race even now. I am enough of a realist to know that things will get worse before they get better. I also know that I will not live long enough to see any great changes for the better. I can only hope that my grandkids (and those that come after) will see some changes.
Even though I have found that I do not fit in these days, I will continue to live my life being true to myself. There are worse things than being a misfit. I refuse to "adapt" (as some call it) and become like the rest of the sheep on this planet. I refuse to play the "keep up with the Jones's" game. I harbor no illusions of my own perfection.
I've spent my life caring for others. My own wants, needs, and desires have never been a priority for me. I've always marched to the beat of a different drum. If that means I will spend the rest of my life alone, so be it.
I fell in love with my ex within about 2 days of meeting him. We were married exactly 3 weeks after we met. We were married for 23 years. Had extenuating circumstances which life inundated us with hadn't interfered, we'd still be together. So I believe in the "love at first sight" concept. Sometimes life is stranger than fiction.
Women may be more obvious in their height preferences, but it's strange when a man 6 feet tall tells me I'm too short or a man who is my height (5 feet 6 inches) tells me I'm too tall. I've even had tall men tell me I'm too tall. So I guess we all have our preferences.
I grew up in a small town and hated it. I learned to hate cities just by visiting them. I am a country girl at heart and was never happy until I moved to the country. I now live in a location where 3 cars in a row is a traffic jam.
Horses and big dogs don't do well in town. In populated areas I can't sit on the porch at dawn and watch deer in my yard or in the pasture with the horses. In populated areas I can't go for long walks in the woods and watch the wildlife. In populated areas I can't sit undisturbed by a stream and while away the day reading.
He was sitting in his boat the other day when he heard a voice say, 'Pick me up.'
He looked around and couldn't see anyone. He thought he was dreaming when he heard the voice say again, 'Pick me up.'
He looked in the water and there, floating on the top, was a frog. The man said, 'Are you talking to me?'
The frog said, 'Yes, I'm talking to you. Pick me up then kiss me and I'll turn into the most beautiful woman you have ever seen. I'll make sure that all your friends are envious and jealous because I will be your bride!'
The man looked at the frog for a short time, reached over, picked it up carefully, and placed it in his front pocket.
The frog said, 'What, are you nuts? Didn't you hear what I said? I said kiss me and I will be your beautiful bride.'
He opened his pocket, looked at the frog and said, 'Nah, at my age I'd rather have a talking frog.'
V-day used to be a good day for me (even though I haven't received a V-day gift for 25 years or so). It was my middle daughter's and my father's birthday. Every year on V-day since she was about 12, she gave me roses and thanked me for being her mother. She and her grandfather always had a good time on their birthday.
V-day has now become a difficult day for me to deal with. My middle daughter and my father died on the same day (02-21-06) twelve hours apart. She would be 26 today. I like being alone on V-day. There are so many happy memories of my daughter that float through my day. I'll go for a long walk in the snowy woods because that's something she enjoyed.
More than 11 years ago a tractor/trailer rearended my pickup twice. I survived a "minor" spinal cord injury. The surgeon told me to get used to life in a wheelchair because I would most likely never regain the use of my legs and I'd never ride horses again. His comments ticked me off. Severely. Six long years and incredible amounts of pain later I was walking. I was also riding horses again.
I don't know if it was perseverance or anger that got me back on my feet, but it worked. During those long years of learning to walk again I often tried to figure out if I was too stubborn or too stupid to give up. But giving up was not an option for me.
OP - I've found that most of the initial contact messages received which are filled with sweet nothings and flowery rhetoric are from scammers, hoping to sweep you off your feet. The remainder of that type of initial message filled with nothing are from the dangerous types: clingy, needy, controlling, stalkerish, etc. Happens to us all.
WW - I just read your book this afternoon. There are so many parallels to my own life and to myself.
I realized after finishing the book that I should never have read it this month. The book stirred things in me that I had hoped to avoid right now. Tears, for one.
I highly recommend this book to anyone who enjoys a good read. It is sad, poignant, real, endearing, deep, powerful. The images created flowed endlessly while I was reading.
ONE Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets. 'We don't have half dozen nuggets,' said the teenager at the counter. 'You don't?' I replied. 'We only have six, nine, or twelve,' was the reply. 'So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?' 'That's right.' So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets (Unbelievable but sadly true...)
TWO I was checking out at the local Walmart with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those 'dividers' that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the 'divider', looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it. Not finding the bar code, she said to me, 'Do you know how much this is?' I said to her 'I've changed my mind; I don't think I'll buy that today.' She said 'OK,' and I paid her for the things and left. She had no clue to what had just happened.
THREE A woman at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM 'thingy.' (keep shuddering!!)
FOUR I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. 'Do you need some help?' I asked. She replied, 'I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?' 'Hmmm, I don't know. Do you have an alarm, too?' I asked. 'No, just this remote thingy,' she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, 'Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk....' (PLEASE just lay down before you hurt yourself laughing!!!)
FIVE Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, 'I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?' 'Just use paper from the photocopier', the secretary told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five 'blank' copies. (Brunette, by the way!!)
SIX A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid had eaten ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and he should be fine, the mother says, 'I just gave him some ant killer......' Dispatcher: 'Rush him in to emergency!'
Life is tough. It's even tougher if you're stupid!!!!
Approximately 70 percent of the annual snowfall in the United States falls during December, January and February. However, for areas near the eastern slopes of the Rocky Mountains, March and April are often their snowiest months.
On average, 105 snow producing storm systems hit the lower 48 United States annually.
The old saying that ten inches of fresh snow contains one inch of water is only occasionally true. In reality, ten inches of new snow can contain as little as 0.10 inches of water to nearly four inches.
GREATEST SNOWFALLS IN USA (Recorded in inches)
In 1 month: 390" Tamarack, Calif. Jan. 1911 In 24 hours: 76" Silver Lake, Colo. April 14–15, 1921 In one storm: 189" Mt. Shasta Ski Bowl, Calif. Feb. 13–19, 1959 In one season: 1,140" Mount Baker, Wash. 1998–1999
Source: U.S. Army Corps of Engineers, Engineer Topographic Laboratories.
The last decent amount of snow I remember witnessing was about 15 years ago. I was living in central PA. We got 33 inches in less than 24 hours. It was great! Following that, we had a cold snap where the temps hovered around -20F for a few weeks. Wind chills were at -60F during that time. It was an interesting winter that year.
I've passed the half-century mark but I still enjoy puddle jumping, snowball battles, picking dandelions, and riding the shopping cart through the parking lot at WalMart. Thanks to an old injury my body objects to some of the more strenuous activities I'd like to try such as sky diving, bungee jumping, and drag racing. As long as I keep my activities within the boundaries set by my body, I can do anything.
imsophie1 Forum Posts (501)
RE: How I wish I was pefect.
Most adults, at some point, have puzzled over the apparent cruelty of children. What we fail to realize is that some of us (adults) grew out of the cruel phase (if we didn't bypass it all together in our youth). Some of us didn't outgrow that phase and never will. Some of us pretend we've outgrown it. And some of us take pleasure from hurting others.Not giving in to the impulse to be snarky or mean or sarcastically cruel or just plain nasty is no easy feat. It requires the ability to think and feel and care about others. Unfortunately, some humans will never possess those abilities. We can only control our own actions and reactions to life. We have no control over how others will react to things we say or do, regardless of how hard we try to prevent offending others.
Anonymity breeds bravado. Hiding behind our electronic force field gives some of us the illusion of invincibility. We are humans, which means we have flaws and we make mistakes (ALL of us). We can only do our best to maintain control over ourselves and our reactions to the world around us.
Human perfection is one of the rare guaranteed impossibilities of life.