I find that there are a lot more people on facebook and while the applications can get annoying all you have to do is decline, so it's not really a big deal and some of them are fun. I've been on it about 6 months and have family in Australia, Canada, California, New York and Scotland, it's a great way to stay in touch and post pictures etc. I also like it when someone I meet online has a facebook account... it's like a little peek at their life and friends.
I never had that experience... I always had a fierce independent streak and just a few months after turning 18 and graduating from high school I moved into my first apartment. I think it's important for a woman to live for a time on her own before marriage, it gives you a chance to discover what you are capable of on your own.
I think that the closer a person is to their heritage the more traditional they live their lives. I think the problem with this thread is that a very generalized statement has been made that could be true of any number of ethnic backgrounds, you've had good experiences in the African community and are basing your opinions on that.
I think you'll find is that these types of values and strong male figures can be found in all cultures, just that in the US and Canada things have gotten so mixed together that a lot of traditional values have become watered down. You have recently moved to Spain... while the food may be different then African, I think you'll find that Spanish men have that strong male attitude with certain expectations of a woman and like being the strong caretaker, they are also very family oriented and take care of their own. I live on a small Spanish Island and experience an amazing sense of community here.
At the same time when I lived in San Francisco I was involved with the Irish community and if someone had an accident at work or a woman lost her husband... the first thing to happen was the local pub put on a fundraiser and several thousand dollars would be collected to help the family out. So again you have that strong cultural pulling together, especially when they are out of their home country.
So while I respect the fact that you feel you have found your niche in life, I think that what people have been offended by is the attitude that these things can only be found in the African community. I think if you look around you'll find these values in all cultures.
I agree Riya... if someone posts a thread "whats wrong with my profile" or "why don't people find me attractive" I'm going to assume that they want to know an honest opinion and all the cuddles and support are not going to give them the answers they are looking for, if they are actually looking for advice.
If what they are really looking for is affirmation and cuddles then just post a thread saying... "I'm not feeling very attractive today, could I have some hugs?"
Thanks Spicy... I went through most of my life not having girl friends, just guys, and so I really appreciate compliments from other women... it means a lot to me.
Manners and being polite were something drummed into me at an early age and something I instilled in my daughter as well, I don't tolerate people being rude and would not accept it in a partner!!! A please or thank you costs you nothing and means so much!
Riya please don't take this personally, but I'm actually quite tired of people always going on about whats wrong in the threads, why is everybody being mean, what's the fighting about etc... There is more time spent discussing these occurrences then there are occurrences.
As far as bashing goes, there have been a couple of pretty brutal threads, but they occurred when someone posted a thread that was insulting or rude and people responded in kind, I think that's an appropriate response. The fact that more then one person had that response does not make it a "gang attack", just several people having the same opinion and posting it. If a cute picture is posted and 10 people say "awwwwww" we don't call it a "gang affirmation".
As far as spelling mistakes go... well there have been a couple of times that the mistake made the post really funny by changing the meaning and the responses were witty and clever... why feel put out over that? Join in on the laugh and show you have a sense of humor.
As far as newbies go... well I haven't been on CS for very long, just a couple of months and I remember quite clearly feeling ignored or unwanted, but I kept on posting, giving my opinions, posted a couple threads of my own and pretty soon started making friends and having interaction with other CS'ers. Yes, it takes a bit of effort... but doesn't it take the same effort in real life? Why should online be any different?
My own personal pet peeve is when I see a thread that looks like a good topic of discussion and it's been hijacked from the first post with a bunch of inane drivel and it's never going to get back to the topic, but hey that's life and there are always disappointments in life, move on and find another topic to discuss or re-post, wording it a little differently and hope for the best.
Life has been crazy... just opened a new jazz club last night and the prep kept me pretty busy the past week, but it was amazingly succesful opening last night and am still recovering tonight! How have you been?
jbibiza Forum Posts (4,914)
I've been diving for over 20 years and it is the most fantastic, wonderful thing in the world... you should definatly give it a go!
RE: Finding people on Face book
I find that there are a lot more people on facebook and while the applications can get annoying all you have to do is decline, so it's not really a big deal and some of them are fun. I've been on it about 6 months and have family in Australia, Canada, California, New York and Scotland, it's a great way to stay in touch and post pictures etc. I also like it when someone I meet online has a facebook account... it's like a little peek at their life and friends.