It just seems to me that it does not work out fair for either parent and maybe the parent that is not the primary carer simply finds it easier when a new partner comes along to use there position to step back more than there allowed or should do.
And the primary carer has to put there life on hold because of it. This is in no way a polorising thread r a women bashing one.
I just would like to hear from both sides of the argument.
I am sure you did. Many primary carers feel they get the brunt of there childrens rath simply because there there and the other one is excluded to some degree.
Hi Vixen. I am not talking about one parent exclusively caring for the child/children here.I am talking about how the dynamics of one being the primary carer for them while the other looks on longingly missing being an equal/or even partial carer to there offspring due to the rules set out privately or by the courts.
I am involved with my two girls and i make myself available to them any time on the phone as well as when im needed to care for them. But this is not just about me. A man may well envy his ex having the children and her being involved with all aspects of there life from getting up to homework to sitting at home having fun in every day activities etc... He has limited time maybe simply because he is not the main carer. But she may feel "Its ok for you you lucky b@stard,you are free to date,go out and enjoy any time you please. As for me? I feel so restricted!!" But what makes you think that he is so much happier?
That is your ideal i presume as partner and thats fine as far as a "relationship" goes only i presume?
But surely the partner will not leave that attitude to the confines o your relationship only? Surely that would include her domestic attitude-that includes toward her children,her family and anyone else in contact with her? Or is that not the case?
I envy you becouse you have so much freedom! Is this a fair assumption towards an ex who does'nt have the burdon or the troubles of bringing up there children? Why should you assume that life is better for them than it is for you? We all have it hard.Don't we? Do you look at friends or family and somehow think.. "How the hell do they manage to enjoy there life so much when there in the same boat as me"? Do you think you have the ballance right between your family life and social life? Where do others get it all wrong? Is life harder or easier for the one left holding the baby?
Online it is too easy to take out your frustrations on others because ultimately they are a name and a face that does not require interaction with in real life. But for me people who are perpitrators and instigaters of meaningless,spitefull gossip and troublemaking online just magnify what they must be like in real life. But we are all human and can be sucked in with the best of intentions at heart due to lack of facts,distortions and agenda's.
Damn it. I have just spent the last 3 days loitering around my pc,staring at my msn friends list,up at my cam then back at my list just waiting for you to sign in. It would have helped a little if i had your addy in the first bloody place!!
*Col is awaiting his next lot of meds to be administered by nursey.
To be fair i think many people do use online dating as a "safer" way of dealing with there dating issues. Far better to poo in the woods than chit on your own doorstep. Especially when you have other people to consider in your life!!
Yes Petal,but most people are learning about themselves while single whilst on a dating site. When there goin through that transition period to my mind there best avoided by anyone looking for ltr.
I believe online dating has its place. Its suitable to those who feel they need to expand there choices fromthe social circles they usually find themselves in.
It is an ideal tool also to find yourself again after the pain of a long term relationship breakdown.
Many people hoped and expected to be in a "till death us do part" relationship for the rest of our lives only to find it end. So we are left thinking "im not the young spring chicken I once was when I last dated",and have no real idea of who we are now,what we want and who we are now and who we can reasonably attract. So for me,online dating was a way for finding out all of these things with out compromising myself too much and while licking a few wounds. The trick is to dodge and protect yourself from those who are ony after an ego boost while unable to give much positive back.
I agree with those sentiments. As ive said before I witnessed cliques and alliances in he forum I as in last.It will allways happen. Theres nothing wrong with them as long as there conduct is not negative or malicious. I woul presume that women will converce with women as a self protection against predatory men. They will soon work out if a mans playing more than one of there friends. As a newby im finding my feet and have messaged a number of women-its to be expected. But so far ive just opted to have a laugh in here.
ContraryCol Forum Posts (601)
I envy you becouse you have so much freedom!
It just seems to me that it does not work out fair for either parent and maybe the parent that is not the primary carer simply finds it easier when a new partner comes along to use there position to step back more than there allowed or should do.And the primary carer has to put there life on hold because of it.
This is in no way a polorising thread r a women bashing one.
I just would like to hear from both sides of the argument.