Have just re-read this "debate" and as usual seen the thread go off course. I have already put my "2 cents worth" in, and thank you Rohaan for your kind response.
This is the internet as if we didn't need a reminder!
Would anyone here be brutally honest if they had eye contact with that person. I think not.I also feel in the real world this also applies to people in general,except concerning family or in a relationship maybe, when the question warranted an honest answer.
As I said before honesty is just that, shouldn't come "gift wrapped" and if you cannot handle the truth don't ask the question.j.m.o.
I have the same problem with my family.Took myself off to Spain at 62 but now back in the U.K. Very rarely here from family and have now reached the stage in my life whereby I am more important and put myself first.
Hi Ali,with all the cities in the world to choose from, a selection of 10 is limiting.Better to ask people which city they consider to be the most beautiful, as most of them have never been to all on your list.j.m.o.
Honesty whether "brutal" or otherwise is just that. If you ask someone's opinion and want a truthful answer it shouldn't have to come gift wrapped to soften the "blow".
Personally I don't think it's the "honesty" to others that is the problem on C.S. it's the spiteful replies that cause the damage.Also others jumping on the band wagon if they don't like someone's response to their "friend".j.m.o.
I also believe a problem lies in that alot of people want to love and feel loved so much that they also fall in love with the feeling of falling in love and being loved that they fail to see what is truely between one another.
I am a big believer that you can fall in love with someone online and that is can be unconditional. I know alot go on about how that looks don't matter, money don't matter, etc, but when push comes to shove, it does for some (and that's not a bad thing). I just think the thought of being in love really clouds us from what we really want out of a relationship. I personally don't care about looks and it isn't a lie when I say that my woman could weigh 300lbs for all I care, if I truely feel love for them and we click, I am all about falling in love with them..But I do understand those where there point of view is that there has to be some sort of physical attractiveness as well, because we all have things in relationships that we need and for some an attractive or semi attractive partner is one of them...That doesn't make them shallow or insensetive, it's just something they need. I think this is something however, that some lie to themselves about because they feel as though it would make them a shallow person to think like that. I think it is far better to be honest with not only people you talk too, but also with yourself about this because I think that has alot to do with why things don't work out on the first meeting...We build up this huge fantasy in our minds about how cute someone is or whatever, that when we meet them and found out how "real" they are, it sends the fantasy into a spiraling dive.
Now myself, I am open about who I am, I will show people my picture if they truely want it, but I am straight up and honest and say, "put the blinders on before you look at the pic" because I know I'm not a real attractive guy and I'm fine with that, I just wish people could be real about it as well in what they expect from a potential prospect because again, I think that is where the biggest let down happens when people initially meet.
We all have the things in people we want. And none of us should settle for anything less....I do think we should consider compromises, but be ready when it is indeed a compromise you get and not the Sir Lancalot or super model that we have been fantasizing about the whole time.[/quote
Spot on as usual. As for your looks,beauty comes from within and in my opinion you are a truly beautiful person.
Hi D.F. Read your post with interest and I have to agree that to meet a.s.a.p is probably the best option,then neither party has been drawn in to a "relationship" and has no "illusions"
I met someone on here over 2 years ago,did all the usual chat,phone calls,promises etc with the hope of meeting, and just when I was ready to travel he dumped me for a local girl.Needless to say it didn't last with her.
I was drawn in to this "relationship" and "fell" for his chat up line,but have since found out that he was a womanizer.It's soooooooooooo easy to be sucked in by on line romance,but can end up hurtful for some people.
I just use the sight for fun now and leave relationships to the real world. Good thread by the way.
I think I changed direction in my life when I reached 60.Having spent most of my life pleasing others,I decided to do something different for me so took off to Spain,learned a new language,more friendships and enjoyed it for 7 years.
I'm now back in my homeland and enjoying being 70 but still excited about life. My friends are still the same ones from childhood [those that are still here ] I have a new home, in new surroundings so every day is an adventure.
Whatever life has in store for me I can handle, as the worst part of my life is behind me, and the future is unknown!
bestbefore Forum Posts (4,701)
As for your looks,beauty comes from within and in my opinion you are a truly beautiful person. 
RE: Dear dishpan hands.....
Whatever you do I wish you good luck.I'm sure you will be missed. Even if they do suffer with loss of memory, your presence will be missed.