steve1223 Poetry (718)

I walk amongst the twilight shadows
I want to cry, but I cannot
I want to howl and let my emotions loose
But they are tightly encapsulated within me

How do you say goodbye to your father
When he does not acknowledge death
When he believes that he will live
But sadly he will not

I turn back to walk into the hospital
The long corridor and up the stairs
To the room where nurses are buzzing around
The final farewell and the long vigil

Slowly the shadows chase from the room
As the sun from night awakens
Breath so soft and measured
This head on pillow lays

Your beauty my heart it overwhelms
Can scarcely believe you’re here
Each day still thank Him up above
For giving me this magic

Slowly you stir, blue eyes that gaze
Love pours forth in abundance
Into my arms you slowly melt
And your lips take me to Heaven

Across this world so far and wide
So many different places that I’ve been
And different faces of this world I’ve seen


I’ve travelled across a desert of mirrors
Where broken hearts lay shattered in pieces
Reflecting back their sorrow and pain

Up snow covered mountains where summer is missing
To mountain lakes where mermaids lay sleeping
Dreaming their perfect dreams of heavenly visions

I’ve seen clowns dancing on graves of heroes
To where dead bodies litter the playground
And soldiers die while walking in peace


I’ve walked through the streets of mighty cities
Where the rich grow fatter and the poor lay dying
To where sleep in bed is but a distant memory

Holy men pray and propound their peace theories
In the meantime the dogs of war let off their leashes
All for the sake of the almighty dollar

All these many place I’ve been and seen
But there is one place I have never found
Is where love reigns supreme

Tears like diamonds finely cut
As many as stars in Heaven
Moans of yesterday escapes
Like seven times eleven

One could ask what does it mean
When the bus pulls in the station
Bodies piled up to the sky
Waiting for cremation

Empty winds howl through the streets
It knows and yet tells no things
Doctors, lawyers, liars and thieves
Where are their wedding rings?

Jagged lightning tears the sky
Machines Mother Earth raping
Maybe it’s already too late
Life force is escaping

Two weeks I was in hospital recovering and on the day I was released they caught the person responsible for the attack. Justice will be done and Alice will be avenged. The law is just and the guilty will be punished.

I sat in the court and listened to his lawyer. He made it sound like he was the victim. His poor upbringing, parental abuse, lack of being able to find employment and so on.

The jury came back with guilty. For twenty minutes the judge droned on how sad it was that this young man, due to circumstances beyond his control, was forced to commit these acts.

After all was said and done, he gave him a five year suspended sentence. My Alice lay cold in her grave and he was free to walk the streets to commit more crimes.

I yelled out. “How can this be justice? This is not justice, this is a farce.”

All that got me was a warning from the judge. Should there be another outburst like that I would be jailed for thirty days. If I speak the truth I will be jailed yet he can kill and walk free, something is terribly wrong.

For many days I was lost in my thoughts, and they were dark indeed. By the end I came to the conclusion that if the law fails us then we must not fail justice.

For months I trained myself to shoot. I was becoming that good that I could put every bullet through the bullseye, not only through it but the same hole for every bullet. I was ready for justice.

There were many high profile cases that took my attention. Firstly the criminal, then the lawyer involved and lastly the judge. A bullet through each eye sent them to face their god. I had terminated my fourth case, as I liked to call them, when the killer of my Alice was in my sights. Once he was dispatched the lawyer and judge followed.

“Is the law blind?” was the favourite headline followed by, “Who will face Blind Justice next?”

The media had named me blind justice. I was hated by the law and law givers but it appears that there was a movement that supported my cause.

I take no pleasure in what I do but I will not cease until balance has been restored. Should you escape the law you will not escape my justice.

I am not a bad man, at least I do not consider myself as being bad. I live in an ordinary house, in a quiet suburb. I used to work as a bookkeeper but these days I am on a disability pension.

I had a normal childhood, I was a only child and my parents and I were very close, however I was definitely not spoiled, just loved very much. You could say that I was shy and rather timid, very much a loner.

Unlike many other children I did not pull the wings of flies or torment the local pet population. The thought of violence made me physically ill, and blood, I would faint at the sight of it. That led to a lot of teasing at times.

When I reached my late teens I had not even talked to a girl let alone dated one. In my mid twenties my parents had just about given up hope of becoming grandparents. You could imagine their surprise when I turned up with a female. Not just a female but one who was extremely beautiful.

It became quickly apparent to them that she was as timid and shy as I was and just as much a loner. We had literally run into each other and after we helped each other up we started talking. We quickly realised that we were kindred spirits.

We continued to see each other and by the end of the year we decided to wed. my parents were overjoyed as were hers. You could say that against the odds we had found each other.

For over twenty years we quietly lived our life. We had two beautiful daughters who were totally different from us. They were outgoing and the life of the party, like a breath of fresh air.

But children grow up and leave home to pursue their dreams. We missed them for they had brought so much joy to us, but they came and visited often.

It was on a Saturday night that we went out, one of those rare occasions when we ventured forth. There was not much that would tempt us to leave home, but this was a movie we both wanted to see.

We were so engrossed in discussing it as we walked back to the car that we did not see the man approach us. The first I knew about it was as the knife entered my chest.

I felt the cold of the knife and the burning of the pain. As I slipped to the ground I could see him attack Alice. I heard her scream and then blackness took hold of me.

I awoke in the hospital, they had only just managed to drag me back from death. Apparently I had flat lined three times. When I questioned them about Alice I instantly knew the answer by the sadness on their faces.

This hunger is becoming so great that I need to slake it. I find myself wandering in a neighbourhood that somehow looks familiar. It suddenly hits me, this is where I used to live and as I continue down the street I see a person I used to know. How deliciously humorous, it is Jim.

As we get closer he recognises me and the expression on his face changes. he stops and stares at me, his look reminds me of a lost puppy.

“Claire is it really you?”

I gave no answer, just stood there, my face giving nothing away. Since I had been, shall we say turned, my appearance had become more youthful. I could see that he was moved by my appearance. He was so easy to read, all the emotions on his face and yes, even lust was there.

“I have missed you so much Claire. I was a fool to leave you for that silly young girl. It didn’t last, she left for another man.”

Still I said nothing, just stood there gazing at him. A faint smile played at the corners of my mouth and that he must have seen as encouragement.

“I’ve been looking for you but you never seem to be home. What do you say to giving it another go. We were good together and I know that we can overcome this.”

Finally the smile widened and covered my face. I opened my arms wide.

“Come to me Jim,” and as he came into my arms I whispered, “welcome to hell.”

A scream escaped his lips as my teeth sank into his neck, but it was short lived and quickly turned into gurgling as I drained the life from him. I drained every drop of blood from him. There would be no coming back for Jim.

The hunger is upon me once again. It gnaws incessantly at my innards, demanding to be fulfilled. My hunger screams at me, only blood will satisfy it, warm, coppery taste of blood. This craving will intensify and reach a level where I no longer have any control over it. To a point where I become almost an mindless entity seeking only self gratification.

How did I become this way? I was not always like this. There was a time I had a husband, children and a home. It was a semi-detached with a white picket fence and climbing roses out front. Admittedly it was not the nicest part of town but it was home and we were happy, or so I had thought.

I lived in ignorance until the night Jim came home and confessed everything. The lies, the cheating, one affair after another. Then he dropped the bombshell, he was leaving me for some twenty year old bimbo. My whole world came crashing down in a matter of minutes.

I stormed out of the house into the night. I needed to get away for I could no longer look at him without being consumed by disgust. Nearly thirty years of marriage and to end like this. I had given him everything and yet he betrayed me like this, cast aside like an old worn out toy.

I wandered the streets, my mind in turmoil. My mood swung between pity for myself and rage at him, and even the thought of suicide entered my mind. All the while I wandered aimlessly unaware of my surroundings.

I ended up outside a dingy Café and on a whim I entered. It was like a movie set out of the fifties. Booths lined the walls and apart from the man behind the counter there was a single customer in the corner booth.

I slid into a booth and studied the menu, which was rather difficult in this dim light. I don’t even know why I was looking at the menu for food was the furthermost thought from my mind. I didn’t even notice the waiter until he placed a coffee in front of me and left without saying a single word.

I was slowly sipping my coffee, totally oblivious to all, so it came as a shock when a soft voice spoke.

“Mind if I join you?”

It was the customer from the corner booth. I was about to reject his request but something in his voice stopped me. It was so soft and smooth, almost hypnotic and I found myself nodding in acquiescence.

He slid into the seat opposite me. We talked for hours and it seemed to be so natural. I felt no fear when he leaned across the table and bit my neck. I felt the fire of the bite and when I came to I had become like him, a creature of the night. In the last second he had spared me and not taken my life.

I can feel someone in the shadows watching me. It is almost midnight. Even though the moon casts eerie shadows I feel no panic. In fact there is almost a sort of calm surrounding me. Far off in the distance I can hear the clock strike twelve, the witching hour.

He steps out from the shadows into the circle of light cast by the street lamp. It is a pale, yellowish glow but I can still make him out. Tall, maybe about six foot six, and well proportioned. It appears that he is wearing a suit with an overcoat flung across his shoulders.

Slowly he moves towards me. As he is getting closer I can see that it is actually a cape that he is wearing. A black cape with red lining that keeps flashing as he is walking. An arms length away from me he stops. Unblinking he stares at me and I am caught in his gaze like a startled rabbit in a spotlight.

What does he see when he looks at me? When I look in the mirror all I see is a woman of forty three. Short and leaning towards dumpy and frumpy rather than a curvaceous, desirable woman. It has always been a bugbear with me that I am not as well developed as my sisters but rather flat in the chest. All in all I do not like what looks back at me.

But he is looking at me in away that no man has ever before. It is like he is looking into my soul. I feel like I am stripped bare to the bones under his scrutiny. One step closer and his warm sweet breath blows on my face. My knees are trembling, yet I cannot move.

Suddenly I feel it. Hot, sharp, agony penetrating right to the core. Even now I still cannot move as his knife slips into me again and again. The last thing I see as I slip to the ground is his cape swirling as he turns away from me.

As I fall ever earthwards
Closer I am to my death
Wind is rushing past my ears
Setting up such a howling din

I spread my arms to slow my fall
And realise that I have feathers
Catch the wind to rise up high
On the thermals I am soaring

I dip and dive and roll to the left
Watch the earth below me
See the fields stretching far
And the blue ocean beyond them

To my right I see a house
This place that I call home
There my darling waits for me
And my son and two daughters

Then I realise, was just a wish
My chute still hasn't opened
Have time to say a silent goodbye
As my body hurtles earthwards

Please can you hear me
I know I’m small
To you I might not matter at all

I feel pain and love as well
Words sting, I feel their shame
To you I might not matter at all

I cry at night, hot tears of shame
Soak my pillow with wretched pain
To you I might not matter at all

So listen now, I’m someone too
You carried me and gave me life
I’d like to know to you I matter a lot

I woke up this morning
And the tears they spilled
The sadness hit me
Like old 44 freight train

Over mountains and meadows
We used to always roam
A man and his faithful companion
Old White Tail and me

Lost the wife last night
Was a tragedy for sure
But nothing to compare
To Old White Tail and me

My sister got shot yester morn
They mistook her for game
As through woods she ran
I’ll miss her for shure

My brother robbed a bank back east
A hail of bullets cut him down
It’s as sad as sad can be
But nothing to Old White Tail and me

My dear old Mammy got hit by a truck
Never forgive her this I’m sure
She tried to take away my friend
Old White Tail the truest skunk of all