Need a feed back from your eyes!
Very long story short!I have a friend lets call her Leena!
She has two kids one 10yrs one 5 yrs.
She is divorced but her ex is very much help full,
Kids spend all most half half by both. And kids are happy.
Leena is in love with a man from USA - Florida. Lets call him MR Florida.
They know from the internet. Almost 2 years. He has been to NL 4 times at the beginning for a week end then a week and more.
Last summer Mr Florida had a conversation over who is moving and to where.
Due to him- If he comes to NL - Lot of work language would drag him from everything. with out no knowledge of Dutch he wont get any resident permit and no way to find a job either. So he kindly drop the idea if she can move.And he provides the school folders as well.
Kids father is all right with moving but he is willing to have full time with kids during school holidays.Can understand that.
But my friend is bit nervous. Before she spoken to me she has asked public opinion from damn website. And the people who live their own miseries thrown negative stories links, where the kids were killed, where the woman were killed,and some were said that she should stay till kids fly out from the nest because the man going to have sex with kids bla bla and now she freaked out. And totally out. Lost interest in her relationship what she build up this far. And the Mr Florida is devastated and he really like her and he said is willing to do anything to make her feel better.
Yes I understand things are happening everywhere. If we look at news there is something. But I am not a person who absorb bad stuff to my mind or soul or my breath. Yes things are happening do we need to compare that to us or think as the same will happen to us. In this life circle we face anything what meant for us to suffer. That is how I see it.
I am trying to help Leena to get her mind back where it was. Can some one give me tip??? I am sure some one might have direct indirect experiences.
Wish you all a good Tuesday!
Comments (9)
Her kids will lose friends. She will lose friends. The bond needs to be very strong to justify her taking the kids from the father. Thats bad.
I thInk a woman in her case should be thinking about her kids before Going to this guy and changing her life for a man. I would not if i was in such a state even thInk of having a relationship with a man in an other country until i was Free of the kids. Its such a bad situation. They will hate her for taking them away from their friends and father. Then she will be miserable, it will end bad . Un less he has a private plane and they can Go to Holland on weekends. Then its different.
I think wise counselling from people who truly know her and who she can feel she can truly trust. Maybe to write down a list of FORS and AGAINST and see how that balances out on paper.. advantages and disadvantages. Too much at stake to be taken lightly.
Think Welela, KN and Nicefeet all have valid points here..
Wish your friend luck..
They tapped into fears that she already had.
They may, or may not be fears about Mr. Florida.
They may be fears from somewhere else which have surfaced and this situation is reminding her of them.
Counselling is a really good idea. Whatever the out for her and Mr. Florida, she will move forward with stuff going on inside her.