Learn Something Every day
I highly recommend that you have someone drive you if you are going for a brain scan.The scan itself is non-invasive - a bit noisy but interesting noises - and painless.
When everyone gets excited, calls in the doctor and wants to inject you with contrast material at first you think "Good!" They have found something! I am not going crazy, and now they know I am not making it up!"
When it is all over and they say we will have full details on what we found on friday and you thank them, pay and go start your car it suddenly hits you: THEY FOUND SOMETHING IN MY BRAIN!
That was the last coherent thought I had. I really should not have been driving. I got home in one piece and neither of the two road accidents I passed had anything to do with me. Really!
This end I got out of the car to find myself encased in mental cottonwool, not able to focus enough to walk from point a to b. I wandered aimlessly about the garden, meandered over to my friend's place but she was out and I think my mother is asleep as her place is buttoned up tight.
I put the kettle on and did not make tea. Made a call to confirm a recording time for tomorrow.
Now i am here thinking whoa i wrote that stupid poem about my brain thirty years ago! I don' even remember all of it, nd have no idea where it is. This is heavy shit.
I'm not even sure what I want to do. Cry? Call up my favorite ex-lover and say 'hey,wanna come over and affirm life with me?' Sit in a corner and suck my thumb? All of the above?
Actually, I am going to try the tea thing again and I am going tro have a piece of cake. Or two perhaps.
I'd like to go and change my DVD's but I still should not be driving and now I know that. So i won't.
If you ever have to do it, take a friend. it will be better for you.
Comments (2)
Then if the doctor finds something, get a second scan. I had a scan 4 years ago which came up with a false reading. My doctor was a lot calmer than I was about the whole thing. I ended up having 3 scans, just to confirm that the 1st reading was innaccurate. Now my friends tease me that it took all those tests to confirm I had a brain at all! But at the time it was terrifying.
Whatever the results...You'll get through this...take one day at a time and don't panic.
I read your blog daily to keep up with how you're doing. Keep hanging in there. A lot of us are hanging with you. And thanks for keeping us posted BB. My thoughts are with you.