Something Went Wrong (210)
slim1977: somthing I have found that works for me is this. concentrate on what you have done that is positive. one day at a time then build from there. I spent a great deal of time in my life, never being good enough. then I just decided that I am me, the good bad and ugly, I have things to offer, people to touch, and a life to live. I deserve to be happy and content. you have to have the grace to accept what you cant change. just take one day at a time.
Easier said then done Slim. My troubles started 10 days after I was born when my mother abandoned me. From there it's been all downhill except for my daughter. I've said it many times in the threads, people don't change. My attitude has been bad for many, many years. I've felt sorry for myself for many, many years. It's part of who I am. Not a good part, but it is what it is.
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Snuggs09: Easier said then done Slim. My troubles started 10 days after I was born when my mother abandoned me. From there it's been all downhill except for my daughter. I've said it many times in the threads, people don't change. My attitude has been bad for many, many years. I've felt sorry for myself for many, many years. It's part of who I am. Not a good part, but it is what it is.
Again, I was in the same boat. If I may be so bold Corinne, maybe it's time to get out of that boat and get your feet on some solid ground. Time for a change of scenery, so to speak. Take a look at life through a different pair of binoculars. The ones you've been carrying are old and dirty. This is just some food for thought.......changing outlook DOES IN FACT MAKE A DIFFERENCE.
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Snuggs, i can relate to the diet my weakness is Cheesy Fries 
and i always feel guilty the next day. But that does not change the person you are inside, and that is what is important.
I have days when i sit and just want to cty when it all gets to much, but we have to dig deep and get thro because because the only other option is going under, and you are far to strong to do that. Don't feel bad about the thread it's allowed we all have crap days and it helps to get it out.
You say you are a failure, no you are not think about what you have achieved in your life, your daughter is succesful she could not have done that without your love and influence in your life.
You are special many here think that, because of what you share with us and the caring you show.
Hang on in there lady, you are worth so much.
and i always feel guilty the next day. But that does not change the person you are inside, and that is what is important.I have days when i sit and just want to cty when it all gets to much, but we have to dig deep and get thro because because the only other option is going under, and you are far to strong to do that. Don't feel bad about the thread it's allowed we all have crap days and it helps to get it out.
You say you are a failure, no you are not think about what you have achieved in your life, your daughter is succesful she could not have done that without your love and influence in your life.
You are special many here think that, because of what you share with us and the caring you show.
Hang on in there lady, you are worth so much.
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hopefloats: Again, I was in the same boat. If I may be so bold Corinne, maybe it's time to get out of that boat and get your feet on some solid ground. Time for a change of scenery, so to speak. Take a look at life through a different pair of binoculars. The ones you've been carrying are old and dirty. This is just some food for thought.......changing outlook DOES IN FACT MAKE A DIFFERENCE.
I believe so Merky. Which is why I believe a positive environment needs to be established.------ This thread is Archived ------
sxc666: I believe so Merky. Which is why I believe a positive environment needs to be established.
Yes, indeed.
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Snuggs09: Thank you Jeepers. Another day to remind myself that the past 67 years were a bummer. Maybe the next 67 I'll get skinny I don't want to be fat when they lay me out in that casket.
Be careful what you wish for my friend. I am skinny and I have to work as hard or harder to gain weight as most people do to loose weight. I have to go on special diets and work out like crazy. Due to my fast metabolism, if I eat things that make most people gain weight, I loose all the weight I worked so hard to gain. Not as pleasant being thin as you might think. JMO 
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jeepers: Be careful what you wish for my friend. I am skinny and I have to work as hard or harder to gain weight as most people do to loose weight. I have to go on special diets and work out like crazy. Due to my fast metabolism, if I eat things that make most people gain weight, I loose all the weight I worked so hard to gain. Not as pleasant being thin as you might think. JMO
I know someone that could voutch for that as well!
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Good morning, Snuggs!
Wake up, DO NOT go there.
You'll so regret it - all your hard work on the path to become a healthy you.
You mentioned a few CSers myself included with no visible problems.
So you would know, I have the same problem you do. Though I am not overweight, I grew up in a family where a girl was always expected to be paper-thin. I don't have this kind of metabolism naturally, I have to struggle to keep it this way because the way I was conditioned in my childhood - the chubby girl is less of a woman. How is that for a problem?
You also mentioned SweetOwen in the same category - read her "Do you expect a woman to have a perfect body" thread.
What I am trying to say - you are right we all have things to worry about and struggle for.
I'd really hate to see you going back to your old ways.
Being a normal healthy weight did not make you happy, you say?
Think again.
What the life was like when (you've said once) you had trouble walking?
Wake up, DO NOT go there.
You'll so regret it - all your hard work on the path to become a healthy you.
You mentioned a few CSers myself included with no visible problems.
So you would know, I have the same problem you do. Though I am not overweight, I grew up in a family where a girl was always expected to be paper-thin. I don't have this kind of metabolism naturally, I have to struggle to keep it this way because the way I was conditioned in my childhood - the chubby girl is less of a woman. How is that for a problem?
You also mentioned SweetOwen in the same category - read her "Do you expect a woman to have a perfect body" thread.
What I am trying to say - you are right we all have things to worry about and struggle for.
I'd really hate to see you going back to your old ways.
Being a normal healthy weight did not make you happy, you say?
Think again.
What the life was like when (you've said once) you had trouble walking?
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sxc666: I believe so Merky. Which is why I believe a positive environment needs to be established.
You're right about the environment. But you also know that that no matter what the environment, my problems with come with me. I'll still be hurt for what he did to me, for the abandonment of my mother, for my stepfather molesting me. The problems don't change just because the environment does.
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Snuggs09: You're right about the environment. But you also know that that no matter what the environment, my problems with come with me. I'll still be hurt for what he did to me, for the abandonment of my mother, for my stepfather molesting me. The problems don't change just because the environment does.
Here's my post again:
Again, I was in the same boat. If I may be so bold Corinne, maybe it's time to get out of that boat and get your feet on some solid ground. Time for a change of scenery, so to speak. Take a look at life through a different pair of binoculars. The ones you've been carrying are old and dirty. This is just some food for thought.......changing outlook DOES IN FACT MAKE A DIFFERENCE.
Changing outlook CAN make a difference in tomorrow!
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you have a Birthday thread lurking 
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Laura25: Good morning, Snuggs!
Wake up, DO NOT go there.
You'll so regret it - all your hard work on the path to become a healthy you.
You mentioned a few CSers myself included with no visible problems.
So you would know, I have the same problem you do. Though I am not overweight, I grew up in a family where a girl was always expected to be paper-thin. I don't have this kind of metabolism naturally, I have to struggle to keep it this way because the way I was conditioned in my childhood - the chubby girl is less of a woman. How is that for a problem?
You also mentioned SweetOwen in the same category - read her "Do you expect a woman to have a perfect body" thread.
What I am trying to say - you are right we all have things to worry about and struggle for.
I'd really hate to see you going back to your old ways.
Being a normal healthy weight did not make you happy, you say?
Think again.
What the life was like when (you've said once) you had trouble walking?
Wake up, DO NOT go there.
You'll so regret it - all your hard work on the path to become a healthy you.
You mentioned a few CSers myself included with no visible problems.
So you would know, I have the same problem you do. Though I am not overweight, I grew up in a family where a girl was always expected to be paper-thin. I don't have this kind of metabolism naturally, I have to struggle to keep it this way because the way I was conditioned in my childhood - the chubby girl is less of a woman. How is that for a problem?
You also mentioned SweetOwen in the same category - read her "Do you expect a woman to have a perfect body" thread.
What I am trying to say - you are right we all have things to worry about and struggle for.
I'd really hate to see you going back to your old ways.
Being a normal healthy weight did not make you happy, you say?
Think again.
What the life was like when (you've said once) you had trouble walking?
Wow, I'm suprised you remember back when I said I had trouble walking.
Ya see guys, overeating is not the problem. The problem is what is causing it. I'm sure you've heard...it's not what you're eating....it's what's eating you. THAT is my problem.
When I was in love with Mike, all my past problems didn't bother me a bit. I accepted it that my mother left me and that my stepfather molested me. Being in love was the focus of my life.
Not being in love now isn't the problem, nor is the problem that there's no man in my life. The problem is what the last man did to me. I know I should look at the birds singing and the grass growing but guys, he didn't just break my heart, he broke me.
So the way I comfort myself is with food. And to tell you the truth, I don't feel good after I eat junk. I feel sick and sorry that I did it but I know I'll do it again. It's a cycle.
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hopefloats: Here's my post again:
Again, I was in the same boat. If I may be so bold Corinne, maybe it's time to get out of that boat and get your feet on some solid ground. Time for a change of scenery, so to speak. Take a look at life through a different pair of binoculars. The ones you've been carrying are old and dirty. This is just some food for thought.......changing outlook DOES IN FACT MAKE A DIFFERENCE. Changing outlook CAN make a difference in tomorrow!
Again, I was in the same boat. If I may be so bold Corinne, maybe it's time to get out of that boat and get your feet on some solid ground. Time for a change of scenery, so to speak. Take a look at life through a different pair of binoculars. The ones you've been carrying are old and dirty. This is just some food for thought.......changing outlook DOES IN FACT MAKE A DIFFERENCE. Changing outlook CAN make a difference in tomorrow!
I didn't know there was a birthday thread for me. I'll check it out.
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Snuggs09: You're right about the environment. But you also know that that no matter what the environment, my problems with come with me. I'll still be hurt for what he did to me, for the abandonment of my mother, for my stepfather molesting me. The problems don't change just because the environment does.
No past problems do not go away, but you can learn to become a better person and live with them.Maybe ask yourself a question, how many more years of your life are you going to let your mother, stepfather take away for you.
You have to fight Snuggs and only you can do it.
There is help out there, don't be ashamed to reach out for it.
Admitting defeat is easy, standing up and fighting is another thing.
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Well everyone is sorry that you are feeling down. Don't focus on the things you think are missing in your life and dont think others that may have more humor, wit, knowledge or confidence dont also suffer from internal doubt and have problems that may even be larger than you are dealing with. Remember they have all failed or experience the down sides of life also.
Your 50th HS reunion that's great and who knows maybe someone is there waiting to see you ... At least you will know how old they are... Put on some music that lifts you up, Go get a movie that gets you laughing, call an old friend and go out to lunch with them, go to a park or playground and watch the kids running around. Don't stay alone and look at what you dont have ...Look at all the good things that have happened in your life. Enjoy the remaining year you have left because the alternative is not acceptable. Your feelings will pass soon if you get your focus onto positive thoughts. Go ahead and taste each of the junk items that you bought then throw them out. You know happiness in not a how much do I weight or how beautiful am I thing. Its a mental state of mind thing. Tell yourself good things always or as best you can and things will soon get better for you. You can also vent here on CS but I think outside is much better ... Get into the Sunshine and Smile while thinking of all your old HS friends that you will be seeing again. How many can you remember? Start remembering those old stories that you need to remind everyone about. I would even write them down so you dont forget them during all the excitement. I have never been to my reunion but I need to go ...
Your 50th HS reunion that's great and who knows maybe someone is there waiting to see you ... At least you will know how old they are... Put on some music that lifts you up, Go get a movie that gets you laughing, call an old friend and go out to lunch with them, go to a park or playground and watch the kids running around. Don't stay alone and look at what you dont have ...Look at all the good things that have happened in your life. Enjoy the remaining year you have left because the alternative is not acceptable. Your feelings will pass soon if you get your focus onto positive thoughts. Go ahead and taste each of the junk items that you bought then throw them out. You know happiness in not a how much do I weight or how beautiful am I thing. Its a mental state of mind thing. Tell yourself good things always or as best you can and things will soon get better for you. You can also vent here on CS but I think outside is much better ... Get into the Sunshine and Smile while thinking of all your old HS friends that you will be seeing again. How many can you remember? Start remembering those old stories that you need to remind everyone about. I would even write them down so you dont forget them during all the excitement. I have never been to my reunion but I need to go ...
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Good4U2: Well everyone is sorry that you are feeling down. Don't focus on the things you think are missing in your life and dont think others that may have more humor, wit, knowledge or confidence dont also suffer from internal doubt and have problems that may even be larger than you are dealing with. Remember they have all failed or experience the down sides of life also.
Your 50th HS reunion that's great and who knows maybe someone is there waiting to see you ... At least you will know how old they are... Put on some music that lifts you up, Go get a movie that gets you laughing, call an old friend and go out to lunch with them, go to a park or playground and watch the kids running around. Don't stay alone and look at what you dont have ...Look at all the good things that have happened in your life. Enjoy the remaining year you have left because the alternative is not acceptable. Your feelings will pass soon if you get your focus onto positive thoughts. Go ahead and taste each of the junk items that you bought then throw them out. You know happiness in not a how much do I weight or how beautiful am I thing. Its a mental state of mind thing. Tell yourself good things always or as best you can and things will soon get better for you. You can also vent here on CS but I think outside is much better ... Get into the Sunshine and Smile while thinking of all your old HS friends that you will be seeing again. How many can you remember? Start remembering those old stories that you need to remind everyone about. I would even write them down so you dont forget them during all the excitement. I have never been to my reunion but I need to go ...
Your 50th HS reunion that's great and who knows maybe someone is there waiting to see you ... At least you will know how old they are... Put on some music that lifts you up, Go get a movie that gets you laughing, call an old friend and go out to lunch with them, go to a park or playground and watch the kids running around. Don't stay alone and look at what you dont have ...Look at all the good things that have happened in your life. Enjoy the remaining year you have left because the alternative is not acceptable. Your feelings will pass soon if you get your focus onto positive thoughts. Go ahead and taste each of the junk items that you bought then throw them out. You know happiness in not a how much do I weight or how beautiful am I thing. Its a mental state of mind thing. Tell yourself good things always or as best you can and things will soon get better for you. You can also vent here on CS but I think outside is much better ... Get into the Sunshine and Smile while thinking of all your old HS friends that you will be seeing again. How many can you remember? Start remembering those old stories that you need to remind everyone about. I would even write them down so you dont forget them during all the excitement. I have never been to my reunion but I need to go ...
Ya see, I don't have any friends in real life. In high school I was shy and introverted. The man that did me wrong was from high school. I'm pretty sure he won't be at the reunion. I've had friends but they always bale out on me. I don't demand anything or have expectations but I do get close to people especially when they are in need of help. It seems to be that people want a friend when they want them, when they need them, and don't allow themself to be available to others. My idea of a friend is someone will call me at 3:00 a.m. for help and I will be there for them. Friends......not in my life.
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put on your coat and go for a walk,i lost my husband 4 years ao, 2 years LATER my son a lorry driver drove on to a site and a 2 year old child ran in front of the lorry,killing her,it wasnt his fault but he have to live with it,we all have to live with it,he have 2 little boys of his own.HAPPY BIRTHDAY LIFE IS HARD.BREDA
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Snuggs09: Wow, I'm suprised you remember back when I said I had trouble walking.
Ya see guys, overeating is not the problem. The problem is what is causing it. I'm sure you've heard...it's not what you're eating....it's what's eating you. THAT is my problem.
When I was in love with Mike, all my past problems didn't bother me a bit. I accepted it that my mother left me and that my stepfather molested me. Being in love was the focus of my life.
Not being in love now isn't the problem, nor is the problem that there's no man in my life. The problem is what the last man did to me. I know I should look at the birds singing and the grass growing but guys, he didn't just break my heart, he broke me.
So the way I comfort myself is with food. And to tell you the truth, I don't feel good after I eat junk. I feel sick and sorry that I did it but I know I'll do it again. It's a cycle.
Ya see guys, overeating is not the problem. The problem is what is causing it. I'm sure you've heard...it's not what you're eating....it's what's eating you. THAT is my problem.
When I was in love with Mike, all my past problems didn't bother me a bit. I accepted it that my mother left me and that my stepfather molested me. Being in love was the focus of my life.
Not being in love now isn't the problem, nor is the problem that there's no man in my life. The problem is what the last man did to me. I know I should look at the birds singing and the grass growing but guys, he didn't just break my heart, he broke me.
So the way I comfort myself is with food. And to tell you the truth, I don't feel good after I eat junk. I feel sick and sorry that I did it but I know I'll do it again. It's a cycle.
I understand 'the-problem-is-what-is-causing-it' part, Snuggs.
But do you have a plan?
You have to...
You surely understand that you can't go back "there" all the way.
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sxc666: No past problems do not go away, but you can learn to become a better person and live with them.
Maybe ask yourself a question, how many more years of your life are you going to let your mother, stepfather take away for you.
You have to fight Snuggs and only you can do it.
There is help out there, don't be ashamed to reach out for it.
Admitting defeat is easy, standing up and fighting is another thing.
Maybe ask yourself a question, how many more years of your life are you going to let your mother, stepfather take away for you.
You have to fight Snuggs and only you can do it.
There is help out there, don't be ashamed to reach out for it.
Admitting defeat is easy, standing up and fighting is another thing.
I very seldom talk about it, but I figure in this instance it is waranted. every day is a fight for me, too much stress puts me in the hospital, I live every day wondering if I have cancer, I am dislexic. relating to jeepers post earlier, a couple of weeks ago I lost 10 lbs. I am 135 and 6' tall so I dont have much to give up. this took a geat deal of my energy. as I said earlier I spent a good deal of time not being good enough, in the shadow of my "perfict" brother. I have a condition that I live with every day, it dictates were I go and how I live, but as I said, I still have good in me to give others. eveyone has good you just have to see it.
I know that in comparison, these things seem small to the things you have had to deal with. when I was younger I almost died, lived with an iliostmy for three years, thought I had 6 years to live, and was told so. what I am getting at is this, we all have the power to overcome our past, accept it and move forward fresh. I chose to forgive, accept, and grow from my experiences. to learn what could be. and promised not to make the same mistakes.
Slim
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Learn to like and believe in yourself.
Can't change jobs. I'm too old to think about starting over. I 67 years old. I need to work 7 more years to accomplish my financial goal. Plus with the economy so bad I wouldn't think about leaving. But it's not easy working for someone who is arrogant and condescending.