Is it acceptable to explore more than one relationship online? (92)
Gateside: When you accept someones invitation to get to know them better with the hope that your chats will develop into a relationship...does that mean other online suitors are off limits? Is it regarded as cheating to be exploring more than one potential.
When I joined CS, I had a couple of interests contact me simaltaneously. I was very keen on both of them and though I would eventually choose one,(Hypocritical I know). When I found one of them online the next day, I was very jealous and accused him of being a cheater.He compared me to his ex. The confrontation turned into a nasty argument which led to the end of the relationship within 24 hours of our introduction,it was not all my fault but nevertheless I regret the incident and wish I could take it all back.I have since discovered that people come on here for other reasons other than dating,e.g for blogs and forums. I feel stupid
When I joined CS, I had a couple of interests contact me simaltaneously. I was very keen on both of them and though I would eventually choose one,(Hypocritical I know). When I found one of them online the next day, I was very jealous and accused him of being a cheater.He compared me to his ex. The confrontation turned into a nasty argument which led to the end of the relationship within 24 hours of our introduction,it was not all my fault but nevertheless I regret the incident and wish I could take it all back.I have since discovered that people come on here for other reasons other than dating,e.g for blogs and forums. I feel stupid
Been there ,done that,too much aggro.Things can get misinterpreted on an internet dating site.Many of my friends who have linked up on here found that " their man" was interacting.
Better you both agree to hide your profiles if keen, until the relationship is sorted.
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Gateside: When you accept someones invitation to get to know them better with the hope that your chats will develop into a relationship...does that mean other online suitors are off limits? Is it regarded as cheating to be exploring more than one potential.
When I joined CS, I had a couple of interests contact me simaltaneously. I was very keen on both of them and though I would eventually choose one,(Hypocritical I know). When I found one of them online the next day, I was very jealous and accused him of being a cheater.He compared me to his ex. The confrontation turned into a nasty argument which led to the end of the relationship within 24 hours of our introduction,it was not all my fault but nevertheless I regret the incident and wish I could take it all back.I have since discovered that people come on here for other reasons other than dating,e.g for blogs and forums. I feel stupid
When I joined CS, I had a couple of interests contact me simaltaneously. I was very keen on both of them and though I would eventually choose one,(Hypocritical I know). When I found one of them online the next day, I was very jealous and accused him of being a cheater.He compared me to his ex. The confrontation turned into a nasty argument which led to the end of the relationship within 24 hours of our introduction,it was not all my fault but nevertheless I regret the incident and wish I could take it all back.I have since discovered that people come on here for other reasons other than dating,e.g for blogs and forums. I feel stupid
I'm confused by your statement.
First of all, yes, it's perfectly okay to talk to several people online - some might become friends, some might not be interested in you, or not be interesting to you after a while, some might turn out to be potential partners. Therefore communicating with several people is not hypocritical at all.
What I don't understand is why you were jealous because someone was online?? How on earth did that make him a cheater??
And how can you speak about having been in a relationship with someone, you've known for less than 24 and only online??
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invinciblemuse: And how can you speak about having been in a relationship with someone, you've known for less than 24 and only online??
Oops - less than 24 HOURS...
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invinciblemuse: I'm confused by your statement.
First of all, yes, it's perfectly okay to talk to several people online - some might become friends, some might not be interested in you, or not be interesting to you after a while, some might turn out to be potential partners. Therefore communicating with several people is not hypocritical at all.
What I don't understand is why you were jealous because someone was online?? How on earth did that make him a cheater??
And how can you speak about having been in a relationship with someone, you've known for less than 24 and only online??
First of all, yes, it's perfectly okay to talk to several people online - some might become friends, some might not be interested in you, or not be interesting to you after a while, some might turn out to be potential partners. Therefore communicating with several people is not hypocritical at all.
What I don't understand is why you were jealous because someone was online?? How on earth did that make him a cheater??
And how can you speak about having been in a relationship with someone, you've known for less than 24 and only online??
What she said ^
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Gateside: When you accept someones invitation to get to know them better with the hope that your chats will develop into a relationship...does that mean other online suitors are off limits? Is it regarded as cheating to be exploring more than one potential.
When I joined CS, I had a couple of interests contact me simaltaneously. I was very keen on both of them and though I would eventually choose one,(Hypocritical I know). When I found one of them online the next day, I was very jealous and accused him of being a cheater.He compared me to his ex. The confrontation turned into a nasty argument which led to the end of the relationship within 24 hours of our introduction,it was not all my fault but nevertheless I regret the incident and wish I could take it all back.I have since discovered that people come on here for other reasons other than dating,e.g for blogs and forums. I feel stupid
I never got such an invitation ....When I joined CS, I had a couple of interests contact me simaltaneously. I was very keen on both of them and though I would eventually choose one,(Hypocritical I know). When I found one of them online the next day, I was very jealous and accused him of being a cheater.He compared me to his ex. The confrontation turned into a nasty argument which led to the end of the relationship within 24 hours of our introduction,it was not all my fault but nevertheless I regret the incident and wish I could take it all back.I have since discovered that people come on here for other reasons other than dating,e.g for blogs and forums. I feel stupid
okay... Imagine you have a bicycle .... and you go to a car salon....You want ,if there is a chance to give a test drive to every one of those cars ....
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invinciblemuse: I'm confused by your statement.
First of all, yes, it's perfectly okay to talk to several people online - some might become friends, some might not be interested in you, or not be interesting to you after a while, some might turn out to be potential partners. Therefore communicating with several people is not hypocritical at all.
What I don't understand is why you were jealous because someone was online?? How on earth did that make him a cheater??
And how can you speak about having been in a relationship with someone, you've known for less than 24 and only online??
First of all, yes, it's perfectly okay to talk to several people online - some might become friends, some might not be interested in you, or not be interesting to you after a while, some might turn out to be potential partners. Therefore communicating with several people is not hypocritical at all.
What I don't understand is why you were jealous because someone was online?? How on earth did that make him a cheater??
And how can you speak about having been in a relationship with someone, you've known for less than 24 and only online??
Yep, my thoughts exactly!
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Firstly,you must decide what you consider a "relationship".Only then can it be judges what is correct or incorrect.
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time4fun4u: Firstly,you must decide what you consider a "relationship".Only then can it be judges what is correct or incorrect.
Call me crazy, oldfashioned or whatever, but my interpretation of a possible relationship developing from initial contact online would be regular emails, phone calls, meeting each other face-to-face and then figuring out whether you're mutually attracted.
Then the relationship begins if both are interested followed by exclusivity if that's the case .. not after a brief online chat
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serene56: Call me crazy, oldfashioned or whatever, but my interpretation of a possible relationship developing from initial contact online would be regular emails, phone calls, meeting each other face-to-face and then figuring out whether you're mutually attracted.
Then the relationship begins if both are interested followed by exclusivity if that's the case .. not after a brief online chat
Then the relationship begins if both are interested followed by exclusivity if that's the case .. not after a brief online chat
You're neither crazy nor old-fashioned - you're spot on!------ This thread is Archived ------
serene56: Call me crazy, oldfashioned or whatever, but my interpretation of a possible relationship developing from initial contact online would be regular emails, phone calls, meeting each other face-to-face and then figuring out whether you're mutually attracted.
Then the relationship begins if both are interested followed by exclusivity if that's the case .. not after a brief online chat
Then the relationship begins if both are interested followed by exclusivity if that's the case .. not after a brief online chat
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serene56: Call me crazy, oldfashioned or whatever, but my interpretation of a possible relationship developing from initial contact online would be regular emails, phone calls, meeting each other face-to-face and then figuring out whether you're mutually attracted.
Then the relationship begins if both are interested followed by exclusivity if that's the case .. not after a brief online chat
Then the relationship begins if both are interested followed by exclusivity if that's the case .. not after a brief online chat
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I would hate to be the guy after 48hrs. especially if I had a pet rabbit 
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Gateside: When you accept someones invitation to get to know them better with the hope that your chats will develop into a relationship...does that mean other online suitors are off limits? Is it regarded as cheating to be exploring more than one potential.
When I joined CS, I had a couple of interests contact me simaltaneously. I was very keen on both of them and though I would eventually choose one,(Hypocritical I know). When I found one of them online the next day, I was very jealous and accused him of being a cheater.He compared me to his ex. The confrontation turned into a nasty argument which led to the end of the relationship within 24 hours of our introduction,it was not all my fault but nevertheless I regret the incident and wish I could take it all back.I have since discovered that people come on here for other reasons other than dating,e.g for blogs and forums. I feel stupid
When I joined CS, I had a couple of interests contact me simaltaneously. I was very keen on both of them and though I would eventually choose one,(Hypocritical I know). When I found one of them online the next day, I was very jealous and accused him of being a cheater.He compared me to his ex. The confrontation turned into a nasty argument which led to the end of the relationship within 24 hours of our introduction,it was not all my fault but nevertheless I regret the incident and wish I could take it all back.I have since discovered that people come on here for other reasons other than dating,e.g for blogs and forums. I feel stupid
Never mind hun,, a real lesson learnt...
The reality is: that it is fine to speak and interact with lots of people here online... Thats why its here... and most people here talk for months/years just to learn about each other.. and interact.. there usually is no more in it than that...
If someone contacts you with romantic intentions, thats all it is... intentions... to develop any relationship, on line or off line... it takes a huge amount of time.. cos you dont want to be getting it wrong..
I do advise you to take it all with a pinch of salt... and dont get too caught up in the moment. What you think might be your match could be just wishful thinking... Everything will happen at precisely the time it was meant to...
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Merriweather: Never mind hun,, a real lesson learnt...
The reality is: that it is fine to speak and interact with lots of people here online... Thats why its here... and most people here talk for months/years just to learn about each other.. and interact.. there usually is no more in it than that...
If someone contacts you with romantic intentions, thats all it is... intentions... to develop any relationship, on line or off line... it takes a huge amount of time.. cos you dont want to be getting it wrong.. I do advise you to take it all with a pinch of salt... and dont get too caught up in the moment. What you think might be your match could be just wishful thinking... Everything will happen at precisely the time it was meant to...
What she saidThe reality is: that it is fine to speak and interact with lots of people here online... Thats why its here... and most people here talk for months/years just to learn about each other.. and interact.. there usually is no more in it than that...
If someone contacts you with romantic intentions, thats all it is... intentions... to develop any relationship, on line or off line... it takes a huge amount of time.. cos you dont want to be getting it wrong.. I do advise you to take it all with a pinch of salt... and dont get too caught up in the moment. What you think might be your match could be just wishful thinking... Everything will happen at precisely the time it was meant to...
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drbombay: What she said
Good Evening DrB
Good to see you agreeing with me...
Cheers.
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serene56: Call me crazy, oldfashioned or whatever, but my interpretation of a possible relationship developing from initial contact online would be regular emails, phone calls, meeting each other face-to-face and then figuring out whether you're mutually attracted.
Then the relationship begins if both are interested followed by exclusivity if that's the case .. not after a brief online chat
Then the relationship begins if both are interested followed by exclusivity if that's the case .. not after a brief online chat
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I think you've had some very sound advice above and you are taking this online dating thing way too seriously.
You goal, I assume is to find you match?
So you're looking for someone with a compatible value system and expectations?
You're chance of finding someone who thinks they are in a monogamous exclusive relationship after 24 hours of online chatting, are one in several million.
You're chances of finding someone who will be able to live with that level of jealousy, are one in several million.
Now combine the odds above.
You need to address your own issues regarding jealousy and possessiveness before you have a hope in hell of finding a happy, healthy relationship.
Jac xxx
You goal, I assume is to find you match?
So you're looking for someone with a compatible value system and expectations?
You're chance of finding someone who thinks they are in a monogamous exclusive relationship after 24 hours of online chatting, are one in several million.
You're chances of finding someone who will be able to live with that level of jealousy, are one in several million.
Now combine the odds above.
You need to address your own issues regarding jealousy and possessiveness before you have a hope in hell of finding a happy, healthy relationship.
Jac xxx
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drbombay: I would hate to be the guy after 48hrs. especially if I had a pet rabbit
you don't fancy Rabbit stew??------ This thread is Archived ------
Call me stupid,gullable or whatever...that is why I thought I'd put it out there for the experts advice cause its something I have been battling with. Where I come from...in real life anyway,its not acceptable to date more than one person, its considered imoral, even if its not physical dating cause emotions get involved and people's hopes are built up and feelings get hurt when the other party decides they like you less.
People are not like shoes u get to try on number of pairs at one time and then chose one.
The fact that a person makes contact in the first place means to me, they already genuinely like what they see but still need to see more interms of your personality, traits and character, if that works both ways, then you can move on. I find one's judgement in multiple dating gets blurred as one tends to not be fully present with either date.You feel like you are a center of attention with all these options.So and most of the time one ends up with nothing. That is just my opinion based on my brief experience on here and in real life.
People are not like shoes u get to try on number of pairs at one time and then chose one.
The fact that a person makes contact in the first place means to me, they already genuinely like what they see but still need to see more interms of your personality, traits and character, if that works both ways, then you can move on. I find one's judgement in multiple dating gets blurred as one tends to not be fully present with either date.You feel like you are a center of attention with all these options.So and most of the time one ends up with nothing. That is just my opinion based on my brief experience on here and in real life.
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When I joined CS, I had a couple of interests contact me simaltaneously. I was very keen on both of them and though I would eventually choose one,(Hypocritical I know). When I found one of them online the next day, I was very jealous and accused him of being a cheater.He compared me to his ex. The confrontation turned into a nasty argument which led to the end of the relationship within 24 hours of our introduction,it was not all my fault but nevertheless I regret the incident and wish I could take it all back.I have since discovered that people come on here for other reasons other than dating,e.g for blogs and forums. I feel stupid