What REEEEALLY Pees You Off About Wimmin... (341)
Bodecia: Chicken.
Bodecia: I see many threads and posts regarding the traits in men that women dislike, avoid in dating/relating and make them shy to commit again to another man.
I would like to hear from the men, as to what really ticks you off about wimmin, what common traits you have all discovered on your weary dating road, past experiences that have made you gun-shy. What do you really dislike in a woman?
Do you think guys, that wimmin from certain countries are more likely to display certain traits? Do you think that the culture they have grown up in moulds their undesirable characteristics as well as their attributes?
Or do you think they are the same the world over??
Please be truthful, do not be afraid of knives in back, or strychnine in your morning coffee, for I will protect you!
I voted 'All of the above' but I do not hate women , I love 'em . It's just the potential is so great to meet a woman with any one or hell maybe all of the above traits . I have been described as gentlemanly , courageous , kind , generally a nice guy but where are the dates , oh no don't ask them for dates or anything more than friendship . Well I have gotten tired of being just friends .I would like to hear from the men, as to what really ticks you off about wimmin, what common traits you have all discovered on your weary dating road, past experiences that have made you gun-shy. What do you really dislike in a woman?
Do you think guys, that wimmin from certain countries are more likely to display certain traits? Do you think that the culture they have grown up in moulds their undesirable characteristics as well as their attributes?
Or do you think they are the same the world over??
Please be truthful, do not be afraid of knives in back, or strychnine in your morning coffee, for I will protect you!
montecito: What I've learned through life about men Jac is that the good ones, are really good and worth going through the ups and downs with.
The other thing I've learned is that men don't want to talk. They want to hear what the problem is and then give them time to figure out in their own minds how to fix it. If they have a question about it, they will ask, but they don't want to talk about it.
The last thing a man wants to hear is "we have to talk". She might only want to talk about a leak in the roof but when a man hears that, he thinks it's going to be about something serious and men don't like to talk about problems for two or three hours the way women do.
Men are just as complicated as women and I think that relationships would go smoother if we didn't try to change each other.
The other thing I've learned is that men don't want to talk. They want to hear what the problem is and then give them time to figure out in their own minds how to fix it. If they have a question about it, they will ask, but they don't want to talk about it.
The last thing a man wants to hear is "we have to talk". She might only want to talk about a leak in the roof but when a man hears that, he thinks it's going to be about something serious and men don't like to talk about problems for two or three hours the way women do.
Men are just as complicated as women and I think that relationships would go smoother if we didn't try to change each other.
I agree
men tend to process internally and tell u what they have come up with as a solution
where we tend to verbally hash things out until we arrive at a solution
I think what happens sometimes is that a man will say something as a solution and we look at that as the opening of the discussion...rather than the close (solution)
so he gets frustrated that she doesn't understand (appreciate the solution) and she feels like he's not listening (which is hard for him because to him the solution had been stated - so what is there to talk about?)
jono7: jac: i just wanted to say thank you for presenting this so well. my thoughts are in agreement with you, but you have said it much more eloquently than i think i could of.
and of course...my favourite part..is usually dessert..(grin)
"See? I've just rambled and thought out loud again. The beauty of the internet is that I get this far without you interupting me and you have to read everything before you come up with your solution."
thank you jac from jono
and of course, hello ambrose
and of course...my favourite part..is usually dessert..(grin)
"See? I've just rambled and thought out loud again. The beauty of the internet is that I get this far without you interupting me and you have to read everything before you come up with your solution."
thank you jac from jono
and of course, hello ambrose
Hey, Artist!
Bodecia: Women, according to Men/Women/Mars/Venus, chat and discuss because thats how they bond, relate, feel worthy, feel strong. Listening and being there are as much as a need in life as oxygen. Men, on the other hand, feel that this decreases their power, so they go to the good ole cave to learn how to "fix" the problem, whatever that may be. Once they have reached that point, they bring the "fixer" to the table as an offering, because this is the way they perceive the woman wants them and what their purpose is in life.
Or words similar to these...
The book is actually interesting and worth a read even if you only read it once and then throw it away.
Or words similar to these...
The book is actually interesting and worth a read even if you only read it once and then throw it away.
Yeah, I suppose I might as well read it. It seems like I've read just about everything else of popular lit on relationships...
montecito: I WANT WORLD PEACE...
As a man, I deeply resent that!
jac379: Well, it did cross my mind that perhaps couples should email each other in order to resolve relationship issues.
Heh - I tried that at some considerable length. My partner learned to utterly loathe my emails.
montecito: What I've learned through life about men Jac is that the good ones, are really good and worth going through the ups and downs with.
The other thing I've learned is that men don't want to talk. They want to hear what the problem is and then give them time to figure out in their own minds how to fix it. If they have a question about it, they will ask, but they don't want to talk about it.
The last thing a man wants to hear is "we have to talk". She might only want to talk about a leak in the roof but when a man hears that, he thinks it's going to be about something serious and men don't like to talk about problems for two or three hours the way women do.
Men are just as complicated as women and I think that relationships would go smoother if we didn't try to change each other.
The other thing I've learned is that men don't want to talk. They want to hear what the problem is and then give them time to figure out in their own minds how to fix it. If they have a question about it, they will ask, but they don't want to talk about it.
The last thing a man wants to hear is "we have to talk". She might only want to talk about a leak in the roof but when a man hears that, he thinks it's going to be about something serious and men don't like to talk about problems for two or three hours the way women do.
Men are just as complicated as women and I think that relationships would go smoother if we didn't try to change each other.
Funny, the two men I was with, when they heard the words, "Could we talk?" both ran (sometimes screaming) from the room. Maybe it was my breath?
Ambrose2007: Funny, the two WOmen I was with, when they heard the words, "Could we talk?" both ran (sometimes screaming) from the room. Maybe it was my breath?
Jeez, I really hope that wasn't a Freudian slip...
(Maybe they ran screaming from the room because I was wearing stiletto heels and a pink tutu?) 
jac379: Maybe women are better "mind readers". Traditionally as primary carers we anticipate the growth and changes in our children, so maybe we are better at reading body language and gauging change and I'd say from my experience, in effect, communicating "telepathically" with our children.
We can come a cropper here, too. We associate a change in mood of a child with a need to do something before all hell breaks loose, so an increasingly grumpy child will need, food, sleep, or help to resolve their frustrations/problems. We then maybe try to do this with men when they need to be left alone in their caves to problem solve on their own (and maybe take it personally if our problem solving/solutions are rejected).
Being the primary carer also may impinge on the "garbage" issue that you raised. As a mother, I have always had a rhythm, an invisible structure to the way that I fit everything in that needs to be done. Maybe women want men to fit into into that rhythm and know when to do things by telepathy, but men, not being au fait with telepathic communication wait to be told, so they don't mess up the rhythm. It's maybe men's way of being thoughtful, or helpful, but is not recognised as such, especially if tardiness disrupts the rhythm anyway.
We can come a cropper here, too. We associate a change in mood of a child with a need to do something before all hell breaks loose, so an increasingly grumpy child will need, food, sleep, or help to resolve their frustrations/problems. We then maybe try to do this with men when they need to be left alone in their caves to problem solve on their own (and maybe take it personally if our problem solving/solutions are rejected).
Being the primary carer also may impinge on the "garbage" issue that you raised. As a mother, I have always had a rhythm, an invisible structure to the way that I fit everything in that needs to be done. Maybe women want men to fit into into that rhythm and know when to do things by telepathy, but men, not being au fait with telepathic communication wait to be told, so they don't mess up the rhythm. It's maybe men's way of being thoughtful, or helpful, but is not recognised as such, especially if tardiness disrupts the rhythm anyway.
Well, I wouldn't be surprised if women were better "mind-readers," because they probably are concerned with an in tune with the emotions of their mates. And perhaps, projecting that concern/nature onto their mates, they expect them to be mind-readers as well?
jac379: Ok, let me give you an example.
My sister is a successful business woman, who also owns a number of properties that she lets out. Part of her sucess, I believe, is that she's solution oriented and thinks like a Martian. I, however, am a snot-nosed single mum who scrapes a living together, my priority being my daughter and now, my granddaughter.
Some years ago, I was having problems with my daughter's father regarding access and his care of her that was really very serious.
One of my possible solutions was that I move away to inhibit the risky access and I asked her if she might have a property I could rent from her, if the need arose.
My sister regarded this as the solution, whilst for me it was more of a last resort and a safety net. She very generously put this solution into effect without me knowing, going to the lengths of actually buying a house for me to rent.
I however, had a number of other avenues that I was legally and morally obliged to follow first. I felt I had to give my daughter's father one final (out of many) chance to sort himself out, I felt it wasn't morally, or legally my choice to seperate father and child and I thought my daughter needed to go through the process of the break down of her relationship with her father and not be uprooted from her friends and life here with no choice.
As you can imagine, my sister felt rather put out that I didn't accept her solution. I felt rather put out that she expected to take control, not just of my life, but that she thought she could make decisions for my daughter's life without taking into account the impact that it may have on her.
As for complaining about men, its not so much a complaint, but a problem that maybe needs to be resolved. Also, is it an unwillingness on men's part to deal with emotional issues, or simply that they have been historically indoctrinated with the expectation that it's not the done thing and therefore haven't learned the skills?
I'm not sure that men and women are really that far apart when it comes to problem solving. Maybe there just needs to be a bit more overlap to coincide with the way our roles are also overlapping in order to attain gender equality for men and women.
My sister is a successful business woman, who also owns a number of properties that she lets out. Part of her sucess, I believe, is that she's solution oriented and thinks like a Martian. I, however, am a snot-nosed single mum who scrapes a living together, my priority being my daughter and now, my granddaughter.
Some years ago, I was having problems with my daughter's father regarding access and his care of her that was really very serious.
One of my possible solutions was that I move away to inhibit the risky access and I asked her if she might have a property I could rent from her, if the need arose.
My sister regarded this as the solution, whilst for me it was more of a last resort and a safety net. She very generously put this solution into effect without me knowing, going to the lengths of actually buying a house for me to rent.
I however, had a number of other avenues that I was legally and morally obliged to follow first. I felt I had to give my daughter's father one final (out of many) chance to sort himself out, I felt it wasn't morally, or legally my choice to seperate father and child and I thought my daughter needed to go through the process of the break down of her relationship with her father and not be uprooted from her friends and life here with no choice.
As you can imagine, my sister felt rather put out that I didn't accept her solution. I felt rather put out that she expected to take control, not just of my life, but that she thought she could make decisions for my daughter's life without taking into account the impact that it may have on her.
As for complaining about men, its not so much a complaint, but a problem that maybe needs to be resolved. Also, is it an unwillingness on men's part to deal with emotional issues, or simply that they have been historically indoctrinated with the expectation that it's not the done thing and therefore haven't learned the skills?
I'm not sure that men and women are really that far apart when it comes to problem solving. Maybe there just needs to be a bit more overlap to coincide with the way our roles are also overlapping in order to attain gender equality for men and women.
Hmmmm...well that sounds more like another of men's "terrible traits" - that is, impatience. Or maybe "controlling(ness)"? Or maybe one could call it "over-decisiveness" or "premature decisiveness." God, so many times I'd be shopping with my wife and I'd say: "Can't you please just make a decision what to buy? Any decision?"
That was so not her decision to make, Jac. There were many complications involved in your decision that needed to be reckoned with, I reckon.
what pisses me of about wimmins, is all the really fine ones that i want wont have nuffins to do wiff moi 
other than that nothin
other than that nothin
Ambrose2007: Hey, Artist!
LOLOLOL! i cracked up! fabulous j!!!!
thanks for this laughter i just can't seem to stop right now.
you've got another great thread going. i just think jac is saying what i would say, and saying it much better. you know me...i can color...but as soon as i develop a vocabulary, i'll join in.
but first i think i will go get one of those wigs....grin
Bodecia: I see many threads and posts regarding the traits in men that women dislike, avoid in dating/relating and make them shy to commit again to another man.
I would like to hear from the men, as to what really ticks you off about wimmin, what common traits you have all discovered on your weary dating road, past experiences that have made you gun-shy. What do you really dislike in a woman?
Do you think guys, that wimmin from certain countries are more likely to display certain traits? Do you think that the culture they have grown up in moulds their undesirable characteristics as well as their attributes?
Or do you think they are the same the world over??
Please be truthful, do not be afraid of knives in back, or strychnine in your morning coffee, for I will protect you!
I would like to hear from the men, as to what really ticks you off about wimmin, what common traits you have all discovered on your weary dating road, past experiences that have made you gun-shy. What do you really dislike in a woman?
Do you think guys, that wimmin from certain countries are more likely to display certain traits? Do you think that the culture they have grown up in moulds their undesirable characteristics as well as their attributes?
Or do you think they are the same the world over??
Please be truthful, do not be afraid of knives in back, or strychnine in your morning coffee, for I will protect you!
Ok,all guns ablazing here??? I'd be pretty peed off if i got her home & turned out to be a bloke
But!! If i was very,very,very drunk, i would probably push IT to one side & keep 
Dont quote me on that as i would be drunk remember 
Ambrose2007: Well, I wouldn't be surprised if women were better "mind-readers," because they probably are concerned with an in tune with the emotions of their mates. And perhaps, projecting that concern/nature onto their mates, they expect them to be mind-readers as well?
Expect, or assume, or simply don't understand how they can be so goddam unobservant and obtuse at times.
Ambrose2007: Hmmmm...well that sounds more like another of men's "terrible traits" - that is, impatience. Or maybe "controlling(ness)"? Or maybe one could call it "over-decisiveness" or "premature decisiveness." God, so many times I'd be shopping with my wife and I'd say: "Can't you please just make a decision what to buy? Any decision?"
That was so not her decision to make, Jac. There were many complications involved in your decision that needed to be reckoned with, I reckon.
That was so not her decision to make, Jac. There were many complications involved in your decision that needed to be reckoned with, I reckon.
I think when a bloke offers a solution that he thinks is the solution and therefore the end of the conversation, it does come across as hierarchical.
The boss of the boardroom has made his decision, end of.
Women can be a bit touchy about what appears to be men's hierarchical rule in a relationship, y'know. Raw nerves and all that.
I think I've just moved on a bit with my own attitude, from this conversation, Ambrose.
Thank you.
jono7: LOLOLOL! i cracked up! fabulous j!!!!
thanks for this laughter i just can't seem to stop right now.
you've got another great thread going. i just think jac is saying what i would say, and saying it much better. you know me...i can color...but as soon as i develop a vocabulary, i'll join in.
thanks for this laughter i just can't seem to stop right now.
you've got another great thread going. i just think jac is saying what i would say, and saying it much better. you know me...i can color...but as soon as i develop a vocabulary, i'll join in.
Hey, what's so funny?
Well, if your vocabulary is as pretty as your paintings I'm looking forward to that!
jono7: but first i think i will go get one of those wigs....grin
You know what they say - the wig makes the man.
(Not sure exactly who said that...either William Shatner or Paul Simon?)Bodecia: Maybe I should have added another choice:
"The inability to express my true opinions for fear of never-ending reprisals"..
"The inability to express my true opinions for fear of never-ending reprisals"..
My God do I relate to that one
Bodecia: Great post. I agree, we can be over critical of ourselves and then project that on to our partners.
A little more chilling out wouldnt go amiss with many.
A little more chilling out wouldnt go amiss with many.
what a fantastic new piccy
SUNSHINEB0Y: what a fantastic new piccy
Why, thank you!
I'm shyBodecia: Great post. I agree, we can be over critical of ourselves and then project that on to our partners.
A little more chilling out wouldnt go amiss with many.
A little more chilling out wouldnt go amiss with many.
If I were any more chilled out, I'd have to put a parka on.
Damn Alberta weather.
kidatheart: If I were any more chilled out, I'd have to put a parka on.
Damn Alberta weather.
Damn Alberta weather.
Really? Its roasting hot here, and getting hotter.
kidatheart: If I were any more chilled out, I'd have to put a parka on.
Damn Alberta weather.
Damn Alberta weather.
We have the AC on upstairs and downstairs.
i just saw your poll and skipped to end to add this maybe been said already but a lot of women not all seem think men have no feelin dont hurt and dnt cry well own up guys i can say i have never cheated or lied to a woman but so many have to me and i do hurt check out best song to describe mans pain ..i wish it woud rain ps by the temptations ;listen to it
ps by the temptations ;listen to itBodecia: I see many threads and posts regarding the traits in men that women dislike, avoid in dating/relating and make them shy to commit again to another man.
I would like to hear from the men, as to what really ticks you off about wimmin, what common traits you have all discovered on your weary dating road, past experiences that have made you gun-shy. What do you really dislike in a woman?
Do you think guys, that wimmin from certain countries are more likely to display certain traits? Do you think that the culture they have grown up in moulds their undesirable characteristics as well as their attributes?
Or do you think they are the same the world over??
Please be truthful, do not be afraid of knives in back, or strychnine in your morning coffee, for I will protect you!
I would like to hear from the men, as to what really ticks you off about wimmin, what common traits you have all discovered on your weary dating road, past experiences that have made you gun-shy. What do you really dislike in a woman?
Do you think guys, that wimmin from certain countries are more likely to display certain traits? Do you think that the culture they have grown up in moulds their undesirable characteristics as well as their attributes?
Or do you think they are the same the world over??
Please be truthful, do not be afraid of knives in back, or strychnine in your morning coffee, for I will protect you!
Great thread Bodecia and a fair call too - there's always been plenty of male bashing threads here, so it's overdue.
There are some women who to be honest, make me ashamed to be female. The manipulative ones who bat their eyelashes and pretend to be victims annoy me. Women who endlessly talk about shoes and handbags also annoy me. I can often understand why men make fun of women - some women are incredibly vapid and small-minded.
Women who marry for money top the annoyance list for me. They'll sit at parties and sneer at people who don't have money, when in fact, they did nothing to earn the lifestyle they enjoy. To me, there couldn't be a more shameful way to live than sponge off of someone else intentionally.
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The other thing I've learned is that men don't want to talk. They want to hear what the problem is and then give them time to figure out in their own minds how to fix it. If they have a question about it, they will ask, but they don't want to talk about it.
The last thing a man wants to hear is "we have to talk". She might only want to talk about a leak in the roof but when a man hears that, he thinks it's going to be about something serious and men don't like to talk about problems for two or three hours the way women do.
Men are just as complicated as women and I think that relationships would go smoother if we didn't try to change each other.
and just for the record, kids, animals and men all do very well on a routine base, I've no problem at all taking out the recycleing after loading the dishwasher.