minor children involved? appropriate time to blend households? (96)
shipoker55St. Petersburg, Florida USA211 Threads 2 Polls 9,362 PostsI dunno
kitty01: Do they still have boarding schools these days?
yeah we have lots of them here
Helloo Kitty Ship Jan
I totally disagree with the.. If we are happy they are happy..
Regardless of how happy you are... doesn't mean the kids see it that way.
Just coz you are all loved up .. doesn't mean the kids feel the same way about the new person..
They may not get on.. or like them much at all. IMO
Regardless of how happy you are... doesn't mean the kids see it that way.
Just coz you are all loved up .. doesn't mean the kids feel the same way about the new person..
They may not get on.. or like them much at all. IMO
I love kids.................slowly roasted over an open pit!!!
shipoker55: I love kids.................slowly roasted over an open pit!!!
My daughter is 12 years old. Though I haven't dated all of these years, I have dated some through the years. Never anything serious. So she's really only spent much time with one man that I dated and that was this past fall. We laughed about Scott dating both of us because she was almost always included in what we did.
Other than that, it's always been a rule of mine to keep Emily away from the men I've dated. I knew none were serious relationships, so there was no need for her to be involved at all.
No "uncles" for her!
Other than that, it's always been a rule of mine to keep Emily away from the men I've dated. I knew none were serious relationships, so there was no need for her to be involved at all.
No "uncles" for her!
dcj22: My daughter is 12 years old. Though I haven't dated all of these years, I have dated some through the years. Never anything serious. So she's really only spent much time with one man that I dated and that was this past fall. We laughed about Scott dating both of us because she was almost always included in what we did.
Other than that, it's always been a rule of mine to keep Emily away from the men I've dated. I knew none were serious relationships, so there was no need for her to be involved at all.
No "uncles" for her!
Other than that, it's always been a rule of mine to keep Emily away from the men I've dated. I knew none were serious relationships, so there was no need for her to be involved at all.
No "uncles" for her!
absolutely
Claayer: yeah we have lots of them here
Hello Kitty Ship Jan
how about sending all the kids there for boarding school, then we will have sanity back.Hello Kitty Ship Jan
kitty01: how about sending all the kids there for boarding school, then we will have sanity back.
I've been on my own since my daughter was 2, her dad decided not to be a part of her life so it's always been just the two of us. I never considered dating or relationships until she was 16. Between work, her gymnastics, she was a competitive gymnast, traveling all over the country for meets, spending time with family, having her friends at the house... there was no time to consider a social life and i felt it would detract from our relationship if I were focusing half my energy on someone else.
I did feel that since her dad wasn't around that she needed good male role models... my father, brothers, and best friend filled this role admirably. The hardest thing about making the decision to raise my daughter the way I did is the void when she became independent and move on with her life. She fell in love with a wonderful Australian guy and after being together for 2 years moved to Australia. The hardest thing I ever did was put her on that plane. After years of defining myself as "Jens mom" all of a sudden I had to learn who Jacquie was.
I had traveled throughout the states prior to getting married and always had a desire to see the rest of the world, so I sold everything I owned and bought a backpack and began an amazing 3 year journey. When I called my daughter to tell her what I was doing I was worried that she would feel abandoned, or insecure because the home she grew up in would be gone. Instead she said that she had been feeling guilty having left me "on my own". She was so happy that I was going to explore and have a life that it made it OK for her to have made the decision to move.
So now we live on opposite sides of the world, but are still as close to each other as ever. I miss being able to wrap my arms around her, but knowing that she is happy and in an amazing relationship allows me to pursue my own happiness and having a mom that is happy with her life allows her to enjoy her life and the decisions she made.
I know a lot of people would question my choice to focus all of my time and energy on my daughter, but I see the end result, a happy well adjusted woman with a great job, in a loving relationship for the past 9 years (getting married march 2009
) and I know I did the right thing.
So MF I didn't vote in the poll because none of the options would be something that I would choose.
I did feel that since her dad wasn't around that she needed good male role models... my father, brothers, and best friend filled this role admirably. The hardest thing about making the decision to raise my daughter the way I did is the void when she became independent and move on with her life. She fell in love with a wonderful Australian guy and after being together for 2 years moved to Australia. The hardest thing I ever did was put her on that plane. After years of defining myself as "Jens mom" all of a sudden I had to learn who Jacquie was.
I had traveled throughout the states prior to getting married and always had a desire to see the rest of the world, so I sold everything I owned and bought a backpack and began an amazing 3 year journey. When I called my daughter to tell her what I was doing I was worried that she would feel abandoned, or insecure because the home she grew up in would be gone. Instead she said that she had been feeling guilty having left me "on my own". She was so happy that I was going to explore and have a life that it made it OK for her to have made the decision to move.
So now we live on opposite sides of the world, but are still as close to each other as ever. I miss being able to wrap my arms around her, but knowing that she is happy and in an amazing relationship allows me to pursue my own happiness and having a mom that is happy with her life allows her to enjoy her life and the decisions she made.
I know a lot of people would question my choice to focus all of my time and energy on my daughter, but I see the end result, a happy well adjusted woman with a great job, in a loving relationship for the past 9 years (getting married march 2009
) and I know I did the right thing.So MF I didn't vote in the poll because none of the options would be something that I would choose.
poo on you jb
it is your obligation to vote!
anyway a coupla people voted just to skew the results-
(i hope they werent being sincere-)
well i think the kansan had a very unique situation
didnt really apply to my question
but always nice to see more of each others' journey
flower and i have older kids-so we get good feedback
i just wonder, since the only women posting here
are so mature (able to self sacrifice-which is good parenting)
and sensible, welllll-
am i nuts? does this kind of thing not happen at all?
puuuhlease!
hey JAAAAN!
it is your obligation to vote!
anyway a coupla people voted just to skew the results-
(i hope they werent being sincere-)
well i think the kansan had a very unique situation
didnt really apply to my question
but always nice to see more of each others' journey
flower and i have older kids-so we get good feedback
i just wonder, since the only women posting here
are so mature (able to self sacrifice-which is good parenting)
and sensible, welllll-
am i nuts? does this kind of thing not happen at all?
puuuhlease!
hey JAAAAN!
426 views
74 posts (dunno how many members)
18 votes
ask straight out 'whats your opinion'
ya dont seem to get many
ship-i prefer braised
or a crockpot
74 posts (dunno how many members)
18 votes
ask straight out 'whats your opinion'
ya dont seem to get many
ship-i prefer braised
or a crockpot
mindfful: 426 views
74 posts (dunno how many members)
18 votes
ask straight out 'whats your opinion'
ya dont seem to get many
ship-i prefer braised
or a crockpot
74 posts (dunno how many members)
18 votes
ask straight out 'whats your opinion'
ya dont seem to get many
ship-i prefer braised
or a crockpot
I viewed but aint got no kiddies... so where shall I vote?
mindfful: poo on you jb
it is your obligation to vote!
i just wonder, since the only women posting here
are so mature (able to self sacrifice-which is good parenting)
and sensible, welllll-
am i nuts? does this kind of thing not happen at all?
puuuhlease!
it is your obligation to vote!
i just wonder, since the only women posting here
are so mature (able to self sacrifice-which is good parenting)
and sensible, welllll-
am i nuts? does this kind of thing not happen at all?
puuuhlease!
I was out last night and saw a young mother out with her 9 month old baby, in a bar. Baby was in a stroller stuck in the corner while mom was making a play for everything in the bar... somehow I don't think she'll be to worried about merging families... stuff like this makes you believe in mandatory sterilization!!!!
kitty01: how about sending all the kids there for boarding school, then we will have sanity back.
hahah
jbibiza: I've been on my own since my daughter was 2, her dad decided not to be a part of her life so it's always been just the two of us. I never considered dating or relationships until she was 16. Between work, her gymnastics, she was a competitive gymnast, traveling all over the country for meets, spending time with family, having her friends at the house... there was no time to consider a social life and i felt it would detract from our relationship if I were focusing half my energy on someone else.
I did feel that since her dad wasn't around that she needed good male role models... my father, brothers, and best friend filled this role admirably. The hardest thing about making the decision to raise my daughter the way I did is the void when she became independent and move on with her life. She fell in love with a wonderful Australian guy and after being together for 2 years moved to Australia. The hardest thing I ever did was put her on that plane. After years of defining myself as "Jens mom" all of a sudden I had to learn who Jacquie was.
I had traveled throughout the states prior to getting married and always had a desire to see the rest of the world, so I sold everything I owned and bought a backpack and began an amazing 3 year journey. When I called my daughter to tell her what I was doing I was worried that she would feel abandoned, or insecure because the home she grew up in would be gone. Instead she said that she had been feeling guilty having left me "on my own". She was so happy that I was going to explore and have a life that it made it OK for her to have made the decision to move.
So now we live on opposite sides of the world, but are still as close to each other as ever. I miss being able to wrap my arms around her, but knowing that she is happy and in an amazing relationship allows me to pursue my own happiness and having a mom that is happy with her life allows her to enjoy her life and the decisions she made.
I know a lot of people would question my choice to focus all of my time and energy on my daughter, but I see the end result, a happy well adjusted woman with a great job, in a loving relationship for the past 9 years (getting married march 2009 ) and I know I did the right thing.
So MF I didn't vote in the poll because none of the options would be something that I would choose.
I did feel that since her dad wasn't around that she needed good male role models... my father, brothers, and best friend filled this role admirably. The hardest thing about making the decision to raise my daughter the way I did is the void when she became independent and move on with her life. She fell in love with a wonderful Australian guy and after being together for 2 years moved to Australia. The hardest thing I ever did was put her on that plane. After years of defining myself as "Jens mom" all of a sudden I had to learn who Jacquie was.
I had traveled throughout the states prior to getting married and always had a desire to see the rest of the world, so I sold everything I owned and bought a backpack and began an amazing 3 year journey. When I called my daughter to tell her what I was doing I was worried that she would feel abandoned, or insecure because the home she grew up in would be gone. Instead she said that she had been feeling guilty having left me "on my own". She was so happy that I was going to explore and have a life that it made it OK for her to have made the decision to move.
So now we live on opposite sides of the world, but are still as close to each other as ever. I miss being able to wrap my arms around her, but knowing that she is happy and in an amazing relationship allows me to pursue my own happiness and having a mom that is happy with her life allows her to enjoy her life and the decisions she made.
I know a lot of people would question my choice to focus all of my time and energy on my daughter, but I see the end result, a happy well adjusted woman with a great job, in a loving relationship for the past 9 years (getting married march 2009 ) and I know I did the right thing.
So MF I didn't vote in the poll because none of the options would be something that I would choose.
Thats lovely.. what a fantastic (selfless) mum!
jbibiza: I was out last night and saw a young mother out with her 9 month old baby, in a bar. Baby was in a stroller stuck in the corner while mom was making a play for everything in the bar... somehow I don't think she'll be to worried about merging families... stuff like this makes you believe in mandatory sterilization!!!!
yeah I see lots of that here
i was not quite that way
goodness-where are peoples mothers?
which is wrong to say because in US
more grandparents are parenting thier grandkids-
i forget but its a really high percentage
golden years snatched by a second go round w/ kiddies
that right
i bumped my own thread
goodness-where are peoples mothers?
which is wrong to say because in US
more grandparents are parenting thier grandkids-
i forget but its a really high percentage
golden years snatched by a second go round w/ kiddies
that right
i bumped my own thread
Hugz_n_Kissez: I can't really put a time frame on it...I do know not too soon though until the kids have got to know the person extremely well and are comfortable with him and with the idea of someone else moving in...They would have a say in it too....My kids are 16....
I agree with you.The kids have a say in everything and should be comfortable with the new situation first.mindfful: i was not quite that waygoodness-where are peoples mothers?
which is wrong to say because in US
more grandparents are parenting thier grandkids-
i forget but its a really high percentage
golden years snatched by a second go round w/ kiddies
that right
i bumped my own thread
which is wrong to say because in US
more grandparents are parenting thier grandkids-
i forget but its a really high percentage
golden years snatched by a second go round w/ kiddies
that right
i bumped my own thread
baaad gurrrl yooooo
I alwasy feel sorry for Grandparents that end up raising children all over again.. I suppose for some they love it and it keeps'em young.. and all that...
But I always think.. if you spent all those years doing that the first time around.. now is YOUR time.
hi joe
point some are making is that its not the kids' responsibility...
but age is a big factor there i 'spose...
im just resentful of you that youre not knee deep in snow-
dont mind me
claayer what i have seen so often
sorry to say
these kids are given to the same group of people
that raised the first group of screw ups
i have seen and worked w/ grandparents
that clearly were a part of the drug use/jail etc
for their own kids and have now been
charged to care for their grandkids?
its sad and depressing.
these threads should just be combined
its all sad, almost hopeless
either its divorce or future divorce from poor planning
sad.
point some are making is that its not the kids' responsibility...
but age is a big factor there i 'spose...
im just resentful of you that youre not knee deep in snow-
dont mind me
claayer what i have seen so often
sorry to say
these kids are given to the same group of people
that raised the first group of screw ups
i have seen and worked w/ grandparents
that clearly were a part of the drug use/jail etc
for their own kids and have now been
charged to care for their grandkids?
its sad and depressing.
these threads should just be combined
its all sad, almost hopeless
either its divorce or future divorce from poor planning
sad.
joe grrrr
snow/ic
are the short terms used to imply:
no school for a week,
cabin fever,(thots of suicide and/ or homocide)
lots of canned food
and the horror of hearing "im boooored" 784 times (a day)
this is a short list of maladies caused by the conditions
commonly referred to as snow and/or ice
snow/ic
are the short terms used to imply:
no school for a week,
cabin fever,(thots of suicide and/ or homocide)
lots of canned food
and the horror of hearing "im boooored" 784 times (a day)
this is a short list of maladies caused by the conditions
commonly referred to as snow and/or ice
mindfful: joe grrrr
snow/ic
are the short terms used to imply:
no school for a week,
cabin fever,(thots of suicide and/ or homocide)
lots of canned food
and the horror of hearing "im boooored" 784 times (a day)
this is a short list of maladies caused by the conditions
commonly referred to as snow and/or ice
snow/ic
are the short terms used to imply:
no school for a week,
cabin fever,(thots of suicide and/ or homocide)
lots of canned food
and the horror of hearing "im boooored" 784 times (a day)
this is a short list of maladies caused by the conditions
commonly referred to as snow and/or ice
hahaha
mindfful: joe grrrr
snow/ic
are the short terms used to imply:
no school for a week,
cabin fever,(thots of suicide and/ or homocide)
lots of canned food
and the horror of hearing "im boooored" 784 times (a day)
this is a short list of maladies caused by the conditions
commonly referred to as snow and/or ice
LOL snow/ic
are the short terms used to imply:
no school for a week,
cabin fever,(thots of suicide and/ or homocide)
lots of canned food
and the horror of hearing "im boooored" 784 times (a day)
this is a short list of maladies caused by the conditions
commonly referred to as snow and/or ice
Guess you don't want to hear about how tan I'm getting at work lately.Sorry,couldn't help myself.Hope you are staying warm.Claayer: Thats lovely.. what a fantastic (selfless) mum!
Thanks Claire, but I really don't look at it like that... it was more about circumstances.
Had Jen's dad chosen to be a part of her life then I would have had time available to date and socialize, it just happened that wasn't the case. I was blessed in having a daughter that I genuinely like, we all love our kids, but that doesn't mean we necessarily like them. So I really enjoyed time spent with her and her friends...there was always on or two of her friends that spent the night 3 or 4 nights a week and with it being a house of "girls" we had lots of beauty nights... manicures and face masks and lots of silliness. I loved my time spent as a mom... the difficult thing was letting go and having to face a life that didn't have her in it everyday!
jbibiza: Thanks Claire, but I really don't look at it like that... it was more about circumstances.
Had Jen's dad chosen to be a part of her life then I would have had time available to date and socialize, it just happened that wasn't the case. I was blessed in having a daughter that I genuinely like, we all love our kids, but that doesn't mean we necessarily like them. So I really enjoyed time spent with her and her friends...there was always on or two of her friends that spent the night 3 or 4 nights a week and with it being a house of "girls" we had lots of beauty nights... manicures and face masks and lots of silliness. I loved my time spent as a mom... the difficult thing was letting go and having to face a life that didn't have her in it everyday!
Had Jen's dad chosen to be a part of her life then I would have had time available to date and socialize, it just happened that wasn't the case. I was blessed in having a daughter that I genuinely like, we all love our kids, but that doesn't mean we necessarily like them. So I really enjoyed time spent with her and her friends...there was always on or two of her friends that spent the night 3 or 4 nights a week and with it being a house of "girls" we had lots of beauty nights... manicures and face masks and lots of silliness. I loved my time spent as a mom... the difficult thing was letting go and having to face a life that didn't have her in it everyday!
omygosh this is my story exactly
and i cry sometimes to think what it will feel like when its over
but im glad too, as you said
that my focus was home
mine is well adjusted
healthier than me
she cracks me up
i am astonished at the healthy choices she makes for herself
but i am sure i will adjust
i look forward to it
mindfful: omygosh this is my story exactly
and i cry sometimes to think what it will feel like when its over
but im glad too, as you said
that my focus was home
mine is well adjusted
healthier than me
she cracks me up
i am astonished at the healthy choices she makes for herself
but i am sure i will adjust
i look forward to it
and i cry sometimes to think what it will feel like when its over
but im glad too, as you said
that my focus was home
mine is well adjusted
healthier than me
she cracks me up
i am astonished at the healthy choices she makes for herself
but i am sure i will adjust
i look forward to it
You should have seen the mess I was when she first told me she was moving to Austrialia... I hid it from her, but the nights of tears and fears...
What would I have in life without her?
You do adjust... and find another life and happiness,
especially when you know they are happy and have a good life.
Like you, my daughter is so much smarter then I ever was...
and has made such good choices in her life...
I look at her and think... how the hell did she come from me?????
You make me write like you
jbibiza: You should have seen the mess I was when she first told me she was moving to Austrialia... I hid it from her, but the nights of tears and fears...
What would I have in life without her?
You do adjust... and find another life and happiness,
especially when you know they are happy and have a good life.
Like you, my daughter is so much smarter then I ever was...
and has made such good choices in her life...
I look at her and think... how the hell did she come from me?????
You make me write like you
What would I have in life without her?
You do adjust... and find another life and happiness,
especially when you know they are happy and have a good life.
Like you, my daughter is so much smarter then I ever was...
and has made such good choices in her life...
I look at her and think... how the hell did she come from me?????
You make me write like you
teehee
women been similar places
chipped and molded into similar spaces
its all good
follow me to the dark side sweetie
we have cookies
the cookies are 6 ft tall and have names
like biff and hans and jared
mindfful: teehee
women been similar places
chipped and molded into similar spaces
its all good
follow me to the dark side sweetie
we have cookies
the cookies are 6 ft tall and have names
like biff and hans and jared
women been similar places
chipped and molded into similar spaces
its all good
follow me to the dark side sweetie
we have cookies
the cookies are 6 ft tall and have names
like biff and hans and jared
I like cookies...
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