Thanks, you really seem to be my sort of person, and I think creative people often are because we look beyond the surface and are usually more vulnerable than others. I have never lied about other men who have shown interest because it's simply not moral from where I stand. Actually that has usually made them take off but I don't care about that, that only tells me they are possessive and not into honesty. I'm really surprised about this guy (and I can talk about him since he's not on here) because he praised my honesty in the beginning. Either he was projecting or he doesn't realize how he has come across. I feel better for knowing that he hasn't been lying to me all along though.
This is for Sommer also; Truth is I am starting to feel old, I've been alone practically all my life and I'm so tired of it... I don't think most people can even believe how lonely it's been. So as Sommer said I seem desperate now, well this is what the Universe has challenged me with but there's no guarantee anything will ever change though I have tried so hard to change myself and feel deserving of something really good. Don't know... Don't understand.
What's wrong with you people? You think it's normal that a man lies to you on many occasions because he's hiding the fact that he's seeing someone else, and I think any form of intense communication is a form of dating and that deserves the SAME RESPECT as any other... I can't believe that people actually feel that it's okay to lie about these things, people who say that obviously have no moral whatsoever and are just as bad. Of course you could have many at one time since sometimes you can't help it but I for one take one at a time or am honest about anyone else who might be in the picture. A man is a handfull as it is and I certainly am not in for any f**** games but I guess that's something people seem to actually ENJOY. That's it, I'm not in it anymore. I've been all wound up for nothing one time too many and you can say whatever you want about not taking things seriously. Seeking a relationship is serious business to me and I can't change that. Goodbye and thanks unless you have something nice to say.
Dolphin isn't so bad but I rather not be any life form that exists on Earth. And I'm serious. This is the valley of the shadow of death, the most gruesome place and no pardon... What good is there about it that human haven't destroyed????
Yes, well it's the 100th time that I've seen potential going down the drain JUST when I thought I was safe... It's a shock. Yeah, this guy wasn't from here so I somehow assumed he might be a bit more serious (won't go into why) but I'm appalled at the dishonesty among people and that's why I wanted to start this thread... not only to moan and whine. Oh heck not sure why really, maybe just venting and getting ideas. You're right, I will certainly try and indulge in positive activities. Thanks for your support dear neighbour!
I suppose there's some truth in that, it's just that when people do compatibility "tests" to each other as we did and the guy is obviously excited about the results that does lead you to think he's really into it. Plus he's telling you many times that he will come and see you soon. Now that's game playing since he's seeing someone at the same time and perhaps to men it's just life but I must say I find lies like that just as real as spoken lies. Guess it depends on YOUR idea of moral.
Oh yes, obviously. If anyone would just be nice enough a guy to freaking grant me the opportunity of getting to know them IRL at least!!! That's probably my greatest frustration... just never getting anywhere, always giving in the hope of receiving only to get a "sorry but no thanks" JUST when you thought you were safe.
I'll try... But I'm freaking angry and sad that I'm stuck here and can't even go on a normal date with anyone... Everything gets so much more intense because of my situation and I did for once try and take it real easy... still no luck. I'm sure venting here is helping though, thanks to all.
Thanks Wooffy, oh I certainly hope not to come across as naive. I have been through worse. But this whole winter has been a series of rejections based on lies and deceit that probably wasn't even perceived as such by the one who rejected, well in fact I've never seen as many sordid ways as I have over the past few years. I'm totally amazed at the level at which people are at. I'm amazed that I was fooled. I'm amazed that life doesn't grant me what I deserve. I'm amazed that I haven't jumped off a bridge in despair over the decadence of mankind yet. Ok that sounds melodramatic but in my darkest moments I really wonder what the heck I'm doing here. You do go into a sort of shock when suddenly ahead of you lies only emptiness which you know you'll have to fill some way. It depends; in a few days or a few weeks you have managed to change your thoughtprocess around and you know you did a lucky escape. It was just one incident among a zillion others. But right now... I'm bloody tired. And I do question how a person can learn to trust anybody after so many bad experiences - and I'm not speaking only for myself obviuosly!
Hi there, yes well this is what I mean, lying is lying and even though your scenario was obviously much worse than mine, it's still WRONG.
My pride certainly has nothing to do with this, after enough rejection pride is the last thing on your mind. What hurts is that you put faith in someone because you know you must try once more to build up an honest and real relationship and not to put some effort into it would be pretty dumb if you weren't seriously starting to feel that there was potential there. What hurts more is that you will have to start all over... rid yourself of the hopes that were raised, clean the slate and have new faith. At my age you certainly don't trust anyone very easily but you give them some initial trust if you're serious minded. I think you have to. So you guys who are here with the attitude "done that seen that get over it because it will always be that way" are already hardened and that's precisely what I don't personally want to become. I'm here to yell and shout that people should stop LYING for Christ's sakes and at least tell the other they are interested in others at the same time.
I realize women do this too and obviously it's just as despicable.
It's true that this guy probably didn't realize that talking intensely for hours and hours before meeting up is a form of dating. Well I also agree that he's a stupid a**hole and I'm better off without him.
What I really like apart from women's sharing is when men come along and show their sympathy, that gives me personally some hope. Thanks.
I don't mean to sound so pessimistic but so many guys from other cultures contact me simply because I'm from a Nordic country, and it's very hard to tell if all they want is to live here or whether a white woman is status for them or whether they are for real. That would be hard to tell IRL, even harder online. Not saying it's impossible but most people do find that the differences are hard to deal with after the initial excitement has worn off.
Thanks, that's very sweet of you... I do appreciate some support to get this off my mind so I won't lie down and die... the idea of starting all over again is just heavy yet I know I must. I sure hope the real one is out there. But won't find him here in this dark forest and don't know right now what I could do to advance the issue...
Far enough to have done "compatibility tests" to each other about most things and also found that the tests on the other site matched, especially the intimate one. No we didn't really discuss anything too private whatever that could be (well I can think of a few things on my own that I don't disclose until the guy really is there for me), obviously he was holding back. If you ask me I think he already had his pants down with the other woman, isn't that how some women get a good grip of a guy? I'm really surprised though because despite some reticence he seemed really excited about our compatibility and said many times that he'd come and see me very soon - DEFINITELY. But... when a guy starts to fuss about his passport that's déjá vu for me and the alarm goes off. And right I was.
Thank you for the sympathy, really. The other day someone asked me if I have a chip on my shoulder regarding men. Every time I meet someone new I try and clear out any such bitterness that might still be lurking at the back of my mind. And every time I get crushed by some stupid and really vile thing like LYING - again. And sad thing is, I'm not the only one.
It's my style to put a lot of effort into getting to know someone who really seems to be compatible and trustworthy, they are not many since I'm not the average girl. That is, until something rang a bell and sure enough the next day I got rejected. Whether you've met or not I think it's decent to tell the other that someone else is in the picture too. You make investments where you think it will pay off, otherwise you might as well become a mannequin or dolly or whatever you call them. From reading these forums I certainly get the picture but I really didn't expect someone who was supposedly spiritual minded to lie upfront. And then expect friendship! Too many seem to want the cake and eat it, now how are we ever going to be able to trust anyone if this is the name of the game????
Turns out that the man I was putting all my energy into (online) and with whom it seemed I was really compatible has been double dating and now decided to go for the other woman. Well, if someone lies like this he certainly isn't someone I'd care to have in my life. I find it extremely immoral to do this sort of thing and have myself been honest about the presence of this guy to anybody who has contacted me during this time. Do men really think this is alright??? I'm still standing today but tomorrow I will probably not feel very well. Please don't make any jokes about this, I couldn't handle it.
Turns out that the man I was putting all my energy into and with whom it seemed I was really compatible has been double dating and now decided to go for the other woman. Well, if someone lies like this he certainly isn't someone I'd care to have in my life. I find it extremely immoral to do this sort of thing and have myself been honest about the presence of this guy to anybody who has contacted me during this time. Do men really think this is alright??? I'm still standing today but tomorrow I will probably not feel very well. Please don't make any jokes about this, I couldn't handle it.
Personally I don't talk about God much because to me it's narrowing down something very vast into an entity of sorts, but it doesn't mean that I'm an atheist.
Well there are tons of books out there, if you're interested enough you can make your own mind quite easily. What i resent are people who take someone's word for something and then go out with it as a form of gospel that they really have no good arguments for at all... plus I don't really appreciate people trying to convert others, which I certainly hope nobody thinks I'm trying to do. Merely expressing a few puny opinions...
Now here's a contradictory statement. You seem to say you don't believe in it yet you're willing to admit that mediums can see other people's past lives???? Anyway, it's up to each and everyone to do research and make up their own minds. But what I feel personally is, that those who think we're at the very top of our evolution and that science is 100% reliable are simply not open to the mystery of life... and the infinite possibilities that life presents...
Seems to me he picked this day to go sightseeing but what he saw must have erased all memory... Well lucky sod is all I can say. Or he's checking whether we are loyal enough to stick around to hear what he is bursting to tell us... Are we? Naaah, let's go do some sightseeing instead. Better value for time and money
Yes that's a point. Sure Christians believe that we go back to being dust only and then suddenly reappear on the day of judgment... hm if you ask me the Asian version seems a little more logical... there's more to life than only matter... Seems a bit strange to me to think that that's all there is.
Asians seem to believe that you can be an animal in one life and then suddenly a human in another. Even the Dalai Lama seems to think so. I was always opposed to this idea since it wouldn't really take evolution into account but look more like a random game of dice. On the other hand, if time is an illusion it's possible that the path isn't chronological but follows some other form of logic.
LOL that was funny! But I mean come on, how unfair life would be to give more happiness to one person and less to another... that is if we can conceive of life as being greater and more intelligent than our puny selves... Certainly by coming back the essence of an individual (some call it soul though I'd say it's not a fixed entity as many religions seem to feel) can truly develop. Why else would some people be so wise and others obviously in their baby shoes?
Oh yes, I agree. There's got to be a good reason for everything. We'd be both overwhelmed and too attached to the past... most of the time. Though some people report remembering this and that.
symbolistartist Forum Posts (761)
Double Dating
Thanks, you really seem to be my sort of person, and I think creative people often are because we look beyond the surface and are usually more vulnerable than others. I have never lied about other men who have shown interest because it's simply not moral from where I stand. Actually that has usually made them take off but I don't care about that, that only tells me they are possessive and not into honesty. I'm really surprised about this guy (and I can talk about him since he's not on here) because he praised my honesty in the beginning. Either he was projecting or he doesn't realize how he has come across. I feel better for knowing that he hasn't been lying to me all along though.