symbolistartist Forum Posts (761)

RE: Giving out your personal phone number

He went to Dubai? So he was not British then... hm... IMO some foreign guys get very obsessive/possessive. That's what happened to me too. Wouldn't take no for an answer.

RE: Giving out your personal phone number

Trentesixquainze is what I remember from France

Anyway, petalbabe; I suppose you can but I can't, I went to the police and they said change the number. The rest is history, found on the EU forums... it was an upsetting experience.

Getting my stuff back after trusting a man online!

Well cutting a long story short; I almost relocated in 2007 to the US for a man I met online, thought it was an opportunity to start afresh. Because of him being having perpetual money trouble including a bankruptcy that was coming up, I ended up going there rather than waiting for him to come to see me as promised, with the idea that I might stay on. I wouldn't be able to go back and forth. That's because I didn't have much money either and the trips are expensive.
Well... I was STUPID!!!

The man was not mean but he was hopeless... always giving promises he couldn't keep, too set in his bachelor ways, a load of baggage he had no way of dealing with... But he got a mental/emotional grip over me because I felt sorry for him. Nonehtheless I had to leave when my tourist visa expired. After that the relationship dissipated as his promises of coming to get me etc. didn't come true. So far so good


However... trouble is a brought a lot of stuff to to the US and left it there because I honestly believed that he'd bring me back after getting a job. I've gotten some things back but recently he said no more unless I pay. I got some money, 200 € or 300 USD and sent it, had no choice because I really wish for at least some of the stuff to come back (needless to say he never followed my pleas about what I wanted first ). I haven't heard anything for over two weeks and I'm starting to worry... I know I know they are only material things... but right now I need peace of mind and want to have this over with after a year of torture (always waiting and having to be in touch with him, never being able to cut the cord...)!

So... let this be a moral story..! but also, please keep me in your thoughts so that he'll send my things rather than use up the money, yes? Thank you!!!

RE: Giving out your personal phone number

Gotta comment on this one too; I agree, men who want to talk at once well they usually have little to say
I may be a bit impatient at times too but that's when you have too many potential dates to deal with... still, there are ways and there are ways...

RE: Giving out your personal phone number

No you can't block people who harass you through the mobile; changing numbers is the only option.

RE: Giving out your personal phone number

Right, that's true though... Prepaid is a great idea, I just never got that far

RE: Giving out your personal phone number

Oh and actually there's something fishy about a lot of men who do ask for it very quickly... as stated, there is Skype.

RE: Giving out your personal phone number

Oh I meant to say I'm wary of dating online IN MY OWN COUNTRY, since people don't call from other countries and you can block them on the internet.

RE: Giving out your personal phone number

Actually one of the many reasons I'm a bit wary of dating online is just that; they can all find my number. I've never given it out to anyone I thought suspiscious but they got it anyway... one guy lied that he was a pilot though he was bum, another started sending me REALLY perverted messages but luckily stopped when I asked, a third one harassed me for two days with the most vile messages and constant phonecalls from various phones after I'd read an e-mail that screamed chauvinist pig to me and I asked to end the contact... In all of the cases I've said very little of any substance to provoke all this. Horrible, just horrible. All I can say is, only give it away if your gutfeeling is telling you it's ok.

RE: hey guys ..you had a good week?

Not quite sure in what sense...? Nah, I've come to the conclusion that the old adage about trying too hard is true, someone made a dissertation on singles over here and said that people usually find someone when least expected. It's hard to accept waiting longer when you've already waited for twenty years or more, but you can't bend destiny and sometimes there's a reason for things to be... That's how I get by anyway. Yes well if this is a warm summer, sticking around the touristy places CAN be a good idea. But I'm actually enjoying the peace and quiet now... hopefully a summer without dramas. So next Sunday I may say; it was a good week because it lacked drama!

RE: hey guys ..you had a good week?

Thanks for asking, well a mixture of many things but today I saw loads of half-naked men in the warm weather on the market, including some handsome foreigners selling stuff from their countries, so I guess that counts for good... looking at the positive side only since the not so good would be that all the nice looking ones were taken...

RE: Why are we alone

In the old days we just put up with an abusive partner. Now we have the age of individualism so it's obvious that we will consider what WE want first and foremost... and we're more rational about what might work or not... sometimes too much so though. There's got to be a balance. For instance, some can't even consider relocating for the sake of love. Pretty unromantic and bland isn't it? Yet most men feel that way from what I hear. Wanting the cake and eating it can be a dilemma that we need to resolve. It's not about being to picky, it's about not knowing what we TRULY need in order to grow and become more whole people and not just another half in a couple. JMO.

RE: Lying about your age - is it acceptable? How much is acceptable?

Question is, is your perfect dream being challenged Perfectdream? And did YOU tell her that you looked into her private finances? Hm? Seems to me a sure case of a karmic couple, one fitting the other. Correct me if I'm wrong.

RE: "YewEye & Venere08 Announce Their Tryst"

RE: Lying about your age - is it acceptable? How much is acceptable?

No way dude, it's always there watching every step you make!

RE: Giving up.............

Well how about looking at it like this; looking for eternal bliss usually lasts longer - for an eternity, obviously. However you can only make love AFTER you found the bliss because then it won't keep you in the net of rebirths and misery and suffering, which seems to ail you... this is not religious propaganda just food for thought....

RE: Has masculinity been overshadowed by malefemininity ?.....

Oh don't forget pms, menopause (though I heard men do get it too) and child bearing (though some men actually lactate!). But then... How would we vindicate our martyrdom???

RE: Lying about your age - is it acceptable? How much is acceptable?

Whoa, what a strange coincidence. Sounds like it was meant to be discovered, maybe a lesson for her - or you. Like that time when I had a lot of issues with my ex and wrote a couple of innocent letters to another man and the computer broke down and he found them and then got them translated mechanically so it all sounded REALLY bad... I swear I will never do anything like that every again, karma catches up with me in minutes!

RE: Has masculinity been overshadowed by malefemininity ?.....

Funny that there are 64 replies here and 4 on the EU forum. I will just copy and paste my reply here:

I think in some ways yes. However I believe it's very typical of deep transitions where everyone has to find a new place in the network of humanity. Women have emancipated, now it's also natural that they go to the other extreme before they find a place where they feel comfortable. All evolution works that way. Obviously men who have after all been in charge of all the so-called important things in life are now at a loss and need to readjust: a. understand and respect women's need for change b. explore who they really are c. find new ways of relating to women b. regain balance and belief in their manliness and find new ways of expressing it so that it's more in tune with modern equality c. dare face their own "feminine" side and integrate it in a healthy way.

Did anyone say they don't want to grow as people? Ahum... I'm sorry but I don't think we can avoid it! But hang in there, I'm sure new order always ensues out of chaos!

RE: Has masculinity been overshadowed by malefemininity ?.....

I think in some ways yes. However I believe it's very typical of deep transitions where everyone has to find a new place in the network of humanity. Women have emancipated, now it's also natural that they go to the other extreme before they find a place where they feel comfortable. All evolution works that way. Obviously men who have after all been in charge of all the so-called important things in life are now at a loss and need to readjust: a. understand and respect women's need for change b. explore who they really are c. find new ways of relating to women b. regain balance and belief in their manliness and find new ways of expressing it so that it's more in tune with modern equality c. dare face their own "feminine" side and integrate it in a healthy way.

Did anyone say they don't want to grow as people? Ahum... I'm sorry but I don't think we can avoid it! But hang in there, I'm sure new order always ensues out of chaos!

RE: who is your ideal match ?

Oh just because I expect a soul mate it doesn't mean he would have to be perfect... on the contrary I expect him to challenge me just a little bit, in a fun sort of way though. I want to learn and grow and the right person would make it into an interesting experience. The wrong person makes you feel the trouble is not worth it... so I think that it's necessary to start with certain "demands" such as "culturally minded" in my case just to narrow down the otherwise tedious task of singling out the potential ones... As a woman you get all sorts of requests and it's often hard to say no because men get offended so easily. I think I will have to take things a step further and simply ignore the ones who don't feel right even if they are sweet sending me flowers and cards... Does this clarify my quest?

RE: Honestly???

Hi there Leaving soon? Finland I mean?
Well, it's a long story, I'll try and make it short. My mother tongue is Swedish so I don't really relate to Finnish culture very well. My temper, my mentality, my habits... it's all much closer to Swedish or European. Finnish in the negative sense to me equals stark, minimalist, gloomy, non-chivalresque, small and maybe a bit narrow-minded... on the plus side is the honesty and a certain zeal to keep up reasonably high standards in comparison to other countries (the old lack of self-esteem is at work here). For me though, I don't find Finnish men attractive. However the worst thing is that though I speak Finnish I would absolutely HATE having to speak it on a regular basis. It's a fun language in a way but torturous and tiring to speak correctly. And since I'm verbally very expressive... well it's tough. I did manage with my ex's son who spoke Finnish but it was quite the everyday challenge to remember words and be able to be funny. I've tried a short relationship with a Finn - thank you no more!

Now I would LOVE to hear your opinions!!! These things fascinate me... If they are sensitive to light you can alert me and I'll write you a pm in order to get around my age restrictions!

RE: Lying about your age - is it acceptable? How much is acceptable?

Yeah when I'm tired I may feel that people who debate wildly are arguing, so I just wanted to make sure it didn't come to that because I have no intention of attacking you for your viewpoints...

RE: Lying about your age - is it acceptable? How much is acceptable?

Young men will have to start lying about being older if they still want to get into my pants as I've changed my age range, But I think soon enough after some rest my radar will be up again, all clean and receptive to any deceit

RE: Lying about your age - is it acceptable? How much is acceptable?

Just because I don't want to feel that I'm arguing with you dear Sommer and in the end it feels like splitting hair, and I'm really really tired today... (tired from worrying/stressing about men so I have vowed to stop and take care of myself for a while and also tired from having had to fix half of my bike yesterday... arrgh) so I think I've stated my points and am willing to leave it at that

RE: an sos to the world ..

I'm not sure what you're doing out there? No one told me! And I'm not sure I get the story either... however one thing is clear, men are good for SOMETHING, and geez was I wondering where that man was when I really needed him!!! I'm an emancipated women, probably just like you, however why should we have to take care of all those things that men do so much better... Sigh, makes me miss my ex! he was so handy. I'm pretty handy, resourceful and smart myself but I'm getting older and more tired, and my health issues aren't getting better on the physical level... But I bite my tongue and feel like a fool for swearing for three hours so everyone could hear it and try and carry my cross with dignity despite it all...

RE: Lying about your age - is it acceptable? How much is acceptable?

Don't know, it was getting confusing. But I suppose I agree with that. I don't really like assumptions and I suppose that's close to what you're saying. However a lie is a lie no matter who and what, surely. But never mind, I'm not really in tune with all this right now.

RE: an sos to the world ..

I made a fool of myself yesterday because I couldn't find the bike key, well thank goodness I found out yesterday and not today when I'm in a hurry, but in the end I had to put the trolley on the other bike but had to unscrew some tight bolts and also change the tire from the other bike... all this with frail female force or lack of it and sensitive muscles, so I was swearing and howling and scaring the neighbourhood. Why do I always have to do such things on my own? So I was really pissed off from being alone with this sort of problem plus wondering how they can open the lock on the other bike... I woke up with anxiety this morning only because of all that. And yes I smashed some bike parts while I was at it... Don't know if it helps to hear but life can be infuriating at times for whatever reason... however I'd stop drinking and smoking and do qigong or something else instead, it's amazing how much more effective it is!

RE: I'm having the impression that this site ............10x...

Yeah maybe in a positive light we're learning to share more openly... But it has to be under control... somehow... now I better stop...

... I must because it's bedtime

RE: Does it make a sense..

Yeah why reply if no one is reading and responding. Lots of threads like this though. More of an issue if people are past 30 I think, most likely you no longer want to play around while most people in their 20s do.