Dear Doctor...

Dear Doctor, last week my turds started floating. The nurse at the clinic said it's because I need more iron in my diet. I told my carpenter friend who gave me a box of cut nails and said to suck on these and it will raise the iron levels in my body. I did, but I accidentally swallowed one and it's been giving me stomach cramps and now my poo doesn't float, but has a reddish brown color. Calling your office for an appointment isn't quick as they booked me 2 weeks out. In the mean time, I pulled down the shower curtain and use it on the mattress so I don't leak and stain the bed sheets. Hopefully, someone will cancel and your office will notify me if they can take me sooner. If you have any recommended medical advice you can give over the phone, please call to let me know.
Signed: Constantly Patiened, Red Rock, Arizona.
sigh
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Comments (1)

At least with regard to the floating issue and it's remedy,
the results seem to indicate that the carpenter nailed it.
However, it also seems that it was more than he could chew. grin
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chatillion

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created Feb 2019
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