2 Funny True Stories I heard yesterday

Yesterday I was out taking nature photographs.
Locally, there are university gardens,
that has many different flowers.
Thus, a goal of mine was to get shots
of different butterfly varieties, which I did.

I also got shots of something I had never seen before.
There were 2 big locusts mating.
Indeed, I almost stepped on them accidently.
Luckily, I looked down before I stepped.

There is also a small pond which has many aquatic plants
and a lot of frogs. I was taking photos of the frogs
and the different varieties of dragonflies,
when an elderly heavyset man walked up to the pond
with either his son, or perhaps a much younger brother,
I'm not sure and didn't ask.

Regardless, we got chatting about different experiences that
we both had and shared quite a few laughs about each other's
adventures.

He told me about how a friend took him to a "snake bar" in Cambodia.
The bar had large glass jars containing
preserved snakes at the corners of the bar.

After having a few drinks, he asked the owner of the bar,
"So, where are all the snakes ?"
With that, a couple of his helpers walked out back and
brought back a burlap bag to the bar.
They emptied the contents of the bag on the floor.
9 live cobras were now on the floor of the bar.

This gentleman I spoke with, said he was looking around for a tree to climb,
but the helpers seemed to have the snakes under control.
The owner then turned to the gentleman's friend and asked,
"which one do you want ?".
The friend proceeded to point to one of the big ones.
With that, one of the helpers grabbed the snake
behind the head, sliced open the snake, cut out the
heart and put that in a glass, still beating and poured
snake blood into the glass.
His friend then drank this down and ate the beating heart.

They next turned to him and asked "which one do you want ?",
and he said, "No thanks, I'm trying to cut down."

Another funny true story he told me was,
that he was vacationing in Costa Rica a few years ago
and that he was on a tour with a guide.
He was carrying some bananas,
because he was told that monkeys were common there.

They came across an underground spring and paused
to drink some of the fresh water.
He said the water was "delicious".
As he was bent down, a monkey came running
up to him, probably because he smelled the bananas.

So, he gave the monkey one of the bananas.
The monkey took the banana and ran off.
About 3 minutes later, the monkey came back
and had something pink scrunched up in his hand.
The monkey got within 2 feet of him and threw
the contents of his hand to him.
It turned out to be a woman's panties.

He looked at the monkey and said,
"that's great, but where's the girl ?"