The Inverse Vampire

It's been raining here a lot recently.
In fact, this is the rainiest spring & summer in New Jersey (USA)
that I remember.
This week alone I was rained out of playing softball;
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and even though it was sunny today,
the game was cancelled because there are puddles of water in the infield.

With all the natural watering of my lawn, it's been actively growing quite a bit more than usual.
So, I decided to capitalize on there being sunshine and venture out to mow the lawn.

The minute I step outside, my good neighbor across the street is in his yard and yells to me
"hey, how you doing Jim ?"

"Great ! How are you ?"

"I'm doing good too, but my wife has been worried about you, since we haven't seen you
out & about all week. She wanted me to go across the street and knock on your door to make
sure you were OK."

We both chuckled a bit at that, as he's laid back, but while she is very sweet, she can also be intense at time.
I said, "It's just with all the rain, I don't have as much reason to go outside.
I haven't been able to play softball nor take nature photos."

About 2 minutes later his wife comes outside and waves and yells "hey Jim where you been ?"

So, I yell back, that "I'm an inverse vampire".
With that, they're both staring at me with WTF? looks on their faces.

So, I wait a couple of seconds and say....
"Well you know that vampires bite women's necks and suck their blood.
Plus, you never see them when the sun shines.
Well, I'm kind of the opposite. I don't suck anyone's blood. You only see me when the sun shines.
And I don't bite women's necks, unless they're kinky and into that sort of thing. laugh

Yeah, that conversation really happened this morning. cheers

Comments (8)

They probably thought that the rain had some strange effect on you. laugh

By the way, it's raining so heavily here at the moment that it feels like November. sigh

May it result in an abundance of flowers to brighten your vistas. bouquet
We get rain every day... the weeds are up to my knees.
I once spent a couple of weeks in Hollywood Florida during the summer a long time ago to help a friend.
I remember the heat was unbearable. I felt like I was walking into an oven, when I opened the front door
to go outside.
However, it seemed to rain midday which was least until it stopped raining.
Then, the heat returned and with it worse humidity. Thankfully, that was the last time I was in
southern Florida during the summer.
Be glad you are not anywhere in FL in the summer, it is just as you remembered from your dhildhood
That's an unusual response from a Florida resident. I most frequently get;

"Oh you get used to the heat and we have air conditioning."

It's funny. But, among the first words from car ads in Florida contain nothing about the engine,
nor the transmission, it's usually; "blows cold air" laugh
I try to stay acclimated for the Heat. It's 94 outside and 74 in the office. Two extremes.
Whenever I eat in a restaurant in Florida one almost needs a sweater it's such a severe change. laugh

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