What language of love do you speak? (172)
Ambrose2007: Perhaps I'm too focused on my pole - regretfully, at the moment - to devote the time to that?
Maybe if you gift him.
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BB_snickers: Maybe if you gift him.
Now I'm kinda scared, A. I wonder if someone might be attacking my pole?
(You know, that I have to defend against, as per Col. Bogus' post?) 
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Ambrose2007: Now I'm kinda scared, A. I wonder if someone might be attacking my pole? (You know, that I have to defend against, as per Col. Bogus' post?)
I think it's probably big enough, (judging from your shoe size of course) I mean as long as brains aren't the problem.
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Ambrose2007: There are others who worship my pole? I thought at one time I knew someone who did, but now I'm not aware of anyone in that category.
Stop saying bloody "pole"!!!!!!
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pole
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BB_snickers: pole
There´s no screaming emoticon, so....
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Ambrose2007: Just saw this. Really, Lonely - a score of 1 for quality time. Seems like loneliness would follow logically from not wanting to spend time together, no?
Yes, I wondered about that too. We will have to define quality time. At the opera or at a football match. At the beach or in church. Fighting things out or having your own quiet space. Reading a book together while not saying a word edgewise. What if she is the quiet type who likes to listen but I don't like to talk?
Operator we have a problem.
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JAN_is: It depends on the country I´m working in. Though Spanish is now my second language.
Bien por usted Señora bonita!
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lifeisadream: Bien por usted Señora bonita!
Muchisimas gracias guapa.
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JAN_is: Stop saying bloody "pole"!!!!!!
Well, if we can tear ourselves from the momentous subject of my pole for a moment, I would like to speak of something seriously - namely, my own religious background and the effects it undoubtedly has had on my attitudes toward relationships.
Though I'm an atheist, and have been since thirteen (more or less), I was deeply influenced by my parents' and other family members' views toward relationships, which are doubtless connected to their religious faith and values (though the connection isn't always clear or even logically necessary in all cases).
For example, I believe in monogamy, commitment, and marriage. I certainly would like to believe, as a believer in logic and atheistic/humanistic philosophy, that these values are logically derived and rationally vindicated. I've certainly considered the possibility, however, that they may not be - or at least not in their entirety.
I've also noticed that I find some authors' attitudes toward marriage very convincing (for example, Harville Hendricks and Helen hunt) who are religious, and I've wondered about why these kinds of people tend to resonate with me when they speak of relationships (until they start blathering about god, of course!).
I think what draws me to them is their positivity about resolving relationship problems. They believe that relationships have a sacred aspect to them and should not be abandoned lightly - a belief which also resonates with me.
That attitude, I think, is reinforced by my personal temperament and psychological preferences - for example, I am highly discriminating about whom I fall in love with (only done it twice in my 58 years), and like to focus on individuals rather than groups - I don't have a lot of social energy - so polyamory is completely unappealing to me.
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Italian.
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Lonely1: Yes, I wondered about that too. We will have to define quality time. At the opera or at a football match. At the beach or in church. Fighting things out or having your own quiet space. Reading a book together while not saying a word edgewise. What if she is the quiet type who likes to listen but I don't like to talk?
Operator we have a problem.
Operator we have a problem.
Well, however you define it, it certainly involves spending time with another person. Your answers, Lonely, seem to indicate a disinclination to that. Do you believe that's an accurate statement, or did the "pole" screw up in some fundamental ways?
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thewall2: Italian.
Today, as a weight plate slipped from my fingers and grazed my foot, I thought: The language of weight-lifting must be pain...
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Ambrose2007: Today, as a weight plate slipped from my fingers and grazed my foot, I thought: The language of weight-lifting must be pain...
no pain ...no gain.
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thewall2: no pain ...no gain.
I didn't get to squat 1200 over night,,right?
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Ambrose2007: Well, however you define it, it certainly involves spending time with another person. Your answers, Lonely, seem to indicate a disinclination to that. Do you believe that's an accurate statement, or did the "pole" screw up in some fundamental ways?
Well, Ambrose, I can see you are the romantic type, like me, so I can see why certain things don't compute. Real life is not always the way we want it to be. Some say 'anything for a quiet life".
And just to prove that men and women are from....whatever, here is a link that will prove that men is destined to only spend very little time with the female of the species. Game on!
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thewall2: no pain ...no gain.
The side of my foot has gained some size, so I guess that proves your point.
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Ambrose2007: The side of my foot has gained some size, so I guess that proves your point.
Gotta be careful in the gym man....safety first.
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Ambrose2007: Well, if we can tear ourselves from the momentous subject of my pole for a moment, I would like to speak of something seriously - namely, my own religious background and the effects it undoubtedly has had on my attitudes toward relationships.
Though I'm an atheist, and have been since thirteen (more or less), I was deeply influenced by my parents' and other family members' views toward relationships, which are doubtless connected to their religious faith and values (though the connection isn't always clear or even logically necessary in all cases).
For example, I believe in monogamy, commitment, and marriage. I certainly would like to believe, as a believer in logic and atheistic/humanistic philosophy, that these values are logically derived and rationally vindicated. I've certainly considered the possibility, however, that they may not be - or at least not in their entirety.
Though I'm an atheist, and have been since thirteen (more or less), I was deeply influenced by my parents' and other family members' views toward relationships, which are doubtless connected to their religious faith and values (though the connection isn't always clear or even logically necessary in all cases).
For example, I believe in monogamy, commitment, and marriage. I certainly would like to believe, as a believer in logic and atheistic/humanistic philosophy, that these values are logically derived and rationally vindicated. I've certainly considered the possibility, however, that they may not be - or at least not in their entirety.
Are you talking about christian values J.?
When you state that you're influenced by your parents who's views are doubtlessly connected with religions faith and values, how then can such a follow up statement be logical, much less rationally vindicated?
Those values are derived from a book/books, (proffered as 'the word'). This is not logic but instruction. Logic would be found in the results of 'is this working for me?" or even better, is it working for more people than not?
The word, has very specific, not generalized, instructions as to the optimum function of relationships between man and woman. People themselves have deviated from this. There is no gender pandering in 'the word', that stuff comes from people wanting to leave those values, maybe expand on them; but still the results show no logic in doing so, unless divorce, pain, suffering and bitterness are the objective.
In response to:
I've also noticed that I find some authors' attitudes toward marriage very convincing (for example, Harville Hendricks and Helen hunt) who are religious, and I've wondered about why these kinds of people tend to resonate with me when they speak of relationships (until they start blathering about god, of course!).
I think what draws me to them is their positivity about resolving relationship problems. They believe that relationships have a sacred aspect to them and should not be abandoned lightly - a belief which also resonates with me.
That attitude, I think, is reinforced by my personal temperament and psychological preferences - for example, I am highly discriminating about whom I fall in love with (only done it twice in my 58 years), and like to focus on individuals rather than groups - I don't have a lot of social energy - so polyamory is completely unappealing to me.
I've also noticed that I find some authors' attitudes toward marriage very convincing (for example, Harville Hendricks and Helen hunt) who are religious, and I've wondered about why these kinds of people tend to resonate with me when they speak of relationships (until they start blathering about god, of course!).
I think what draws me to them is their positivity about resolving relationship problems. They believe that relationships have a sacred aspect to them and should not be abandoned lightly - a belief which also resonates with me.
That attitude, I think, is reinforced by my personal temperament and psychological preferences - for example, I am highly discriminating about whom I fall in love with (only done it twice in my 58 years), and like to focus on individuals rather than groups - I don't have a lot of social energy - so polyamory is completely unappealing to me.
I had a whole bunch of Buddha like things to say about all that but he told me I'd just be blathering to you. ------ This thread is Archived ------
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Perhaps I'm too focused on my pole - regretfully, at the moment - to devote the time to that?