I sit between two circles On a bench cast in iron Pitted with age and memories Beneath my feet lie Paths of crazy paving Trying to mock All that is order in life A grassed outer circle Sits sheltered by trees Each of differing hues Rooted to life Fighting for space In a genetic battle Where light Is their only master Small insects travel Hither and thither Searching for existence But never sure Where it may lie But seeming to understand That it is here somewhere
The small inner circle Is ringed in iron spears Sharp and erect Like a guard of honour Flowers form a barricade To the inner sanctum Grateful for the wisps Of life giving spray Repaying their dues With an abundance of colour A small fountain Cascades back into itself With that soft caress Only water can exude Mesmerising my thoughts Spreading its gentle fall Over my very being Until I seem to reach A state of pure peace It is only here For that moment in time That life Stalls
shadow1950taunton, Somerset, England UKMay 26, 2015
how delightful Rob and what a paradise you make it sound. Zen springs to mind. As always a superb pen hugs
GadfIyLake District, Cumbria, England UKMay 26, 2015
Rob
I love the descriptive prose you use to bring this scene to life - it not only draws the reader in, but makes (this reader, at least) wish he was there enjoying such an idyll.
Regards
Bill
beautifulyouNew York, USAMay 26, 2015
rob, another beauty!
i love your wonderful weaving -the back and forth- between outer movement and still life, and then how you came to pure peace!
ty for sharing this with us. it's exquisitely written
Until I seem to reach A state of pure peace It is only here For that moment in time That life Stalls
Rob, a very intriguing thoughts evoked on life. Your description of humanity finding that beacon that leads to survival is most described in a very elusive way.
The last lines, a glimpse of reality well expressed. Acceptance. .no more no less.
chisommikelsonengland, Kent, England UKMay 29, 2015
HELLOW TRUROROB, "Beneath my feet lie Paths of crazy paving Trying to mock ......where light is their only master" PLEASE CAN YOU MAKE CLEARER THE SENSE YOU CONNOTE IN THOSE LINES? CHISOMMIKELSON
Hi Chissom, I tried to mail you personally but was blocked so I am posting my answer to your questions here. This writer sees poetry as writing outside the norm but keeping within most boundaries of reality. We humans see order in life as neat and tidy and obeying laws, things in order like straight lines or level, therefore crazy paving to us doesnt seem to obey these laws, so because we can like it and appreciate its own kind of beauty is it seen as trying to mock all that is in order in life.
Trees must have an awareness that to survive they must have light, without it they die, therefore it is a battle to reach it before others and try to keep it by being the highest, so within reason it must be a genetic battle that they have to win. I hope this explains what I meant, I feel we cannot have boundaries to what we think, but they must make some sort of sense. Have a good day. Rob
socrates44San Fernando, Trinidad and TobagoJun 2, 2015
Rob
A true masterpiece! This is exquisite free verse. The line layout is great, with pauses that create a sense of metre and highlight the vivid imagery painted and the message conveyed. The writing style is very compact and clear. An excellent tapestry depicting Nature in action!
Hello Rob, Your style is quite unique, and tells of emotion expressed in its own individual style, your talent shines through in this site where talent is common place. pHIL;
BludylaskyPaynesville, Victoria AustraliaOct 25, 2015
Hi rob :) Fantastic imagery, excellent word choice, beautifully crafted and thought provoking. Sitting on benches cast in iron can become painful after a while, remember to stretch your legs occasionally. ;) Elle x
Rob, my friend......such a description of being at peace ..all woven together as it truly is in life! You brought us a celebration of the best part of a day in "The Park". Salut! Avias
Comments (65)
I love the descriptive prose you use to bring this scene to life - it not only draws the reader in, but makes (this reader, at least) wish he was there enjoying such an idyll.
Regards
Bill
another beauty!
i love your wonderful weaving -the back and
forth- between outer movement and still life,
and then how you came to pure peace!
ty for sharing this with us.
it's exquisitely written
A state of pure peace
It is only here
For that moment in time
That life
Stalls
Rob, a very intriguing thoughts evoked on life. Your description of humanity finding that beacon that leads to survival is most described in a very elusive way.
The last lines, a glimpse of reality well expressed. Acceptance. .no more no less.
Inspiring Rob.
Take care.
Rob
"Beneath my feet lie
Paths of crazy paving
Trying to mock
......where light is
their only master"
PLEASE CAN YOU MAKE CLEARER THE SENSE YOU CONNOTE IN THOSE LINES?
CHISOMMIKELSON
I tried to mail you personally but was blocked so I am posting my answer to your questions here.
This writer sees poetry as writing outside the norm but keeping within most boundaries of reality.
We humans see order in life as neat and tidy and obeying laws, things in order like straight lines or level, therefore crazy paving to us doesnt seem to obey these laws, so because we can like it and appreciate its own kind of beauty is it seen as trying to mock all that is in order in life.
Trees must have an awareness that to survive they must have light, without it they die, therefore it is a battle to reach it before others and try to keep it by being the highest, so within reason it must be a genetic battle that they have to win.
I hope this explains what I meant, I feel we cannot have boundaries to what we think, but they must make some sort of sense.
Have a good day.
Rob
A true masterpiece!
This is exquisite free verse.
The line layout is great, with pauses that create a sense of metre and highlight the vivid imagery painted and the message conveyed.
The writing style is very compact and clear.
An excellent tapestry depicting Nature in action!
Great Job!
Rob
Rob
Rob
your beauty to us Rob
Thank you
Rob
pHIL;
Rob
Rob
Rob
from life's simple things is very evident
in this fine write Rob.
Really enjoyed the read......Mick.
Rob
Rob
Rob
Rob
Rob
Rob
Fantastic imagery, excellent word choice, beautifully crafted and thought provoking.
Sitting on benches cast in iron can become painful after a while, remember to stretch your legs occasionally. ;)
Elle x
Rob
Rob
Rob
Rob
El Parque es una pieza de tu estilo y muy bello.SM