The_Kansan Forum Posts (3,395)

Military Wisdom...

WISDOM - FROM THE MILITARY MANUAL


"If the enemy is in range, so are you." - Infantry Journal


"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed." - U.S. Air Force Manual


"Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never encountered automatic weapons." - General MacArthur


"You, you, and you ... Panic. The rest of you, come with me." - U.S. Marine Corp Gunnery Sgt.


"Tracers work both ways." - U.S. Army Ordnance


"Five second fuses only last three seconds." - Infantry Journal


"Any ship can be a minesweeper. Once."


"Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do." - Unknown Marine Recruit


"If you see a bomb technician running, follow him." - USAF Ammo Troop


"Though I Fly Through the Valley of Death, I Shall Fear No Evil. For I am at 40,000 Feet and Climbing."


"You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3." - Paul F. Crickmore (test pilot)


"The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire."


"If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it's probably a helicopter -- and therefore, unsafe."


"When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash."


"Even with ammunition, the USAF is just another expensive flying club."


"What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots? If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; If ATC screws up, .... The pilot dies."


"Never trade luck for skill."


The three most common expressions (or famous last words) in aviation are: "Why is it doing that?", "Where are we?" And "Oh S...!"


"Friendly fire - isn't"


"Airspeed, altitude and brains. Two are always needed to successfully complete the flight."


"Mankind has a perfect record in aviation; We've never left one up there!"


"Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a person on the ground incapable of understanding or doing anything about it."


"The Piper Cub is the safest airplane in the world; it can just barely kill you." - Attributed to Max Stanley (Northrop test pilot)


"There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime." Sign over squadron ops desk at Davis-Monthan AFB, AZ, 1970


"If something hasn't broken on your helicopter, it's about to."


"You know that your landing gear is up and locked when it takes full power to taxi to the terminal."


As the test pilot climbs out of the experimental aircraft, having torn off the wings and tail in the crash landing, the crash truck arrives,the rescuer sees a bloodied pilot and asks "What happened?". The pilot's reply: "I don't know, I just got here myself!" - Attributed to Ray Crandell (Lockheed test pilot)

RE: Pick the pocket of the person above you. . . . . . . . .

Ok, I'm a naive countryboy. What are 'J's'? Jews? Jewells? Jack knives? Johnson outboard motors? Help me out a little...

RE: Pick the pocket of the person above you. . . . . . . . .

I pick 'em up today!

RE: Pick the pocket of the person above you. . . . . . . . .

Actually, in this picture the 'skins' I'm wearing have no pockets. The skinning knife is on my belt, but since I shoot muzzleloaders almost exclusively, there are no 'cartridges' of any kind.

RE: Pick the pocket of the person above you. . . . . . . . .

An "I Barrack" bumpersticker and a Proud Grandma lapel pin.

RE: hye everyone ....

Hey Stew!

Good to see you're still kickin'! I've had the honor of meeting a couple of members. (And the privilege of marryin' one of 'em.) If you get through the Knoxville area, give us a holler and I'll buy you a cup of coffee!

In the mean time, keep on keepin' on and keep us posted.


...Don...

RE: To tip or not to tip

Once, after a terrible meal in Albuquerque, NM. (bad service - the waiter was more intent upon playing grabass with the cashier - the food was cold and undercooked and they even got the order wrong!) I left a nickel tip.

I'd always enjoyed that restaraunt, so I made a point of talking with the manager. (Something I almost never do!) While we were talking, the waiter came up and said "You can have your tip back, Sir!" I replied, "That's alright Son, you keep it... You earned it, but you might want to split it with the cook."

(I was told later, that my nickel tip and my remark did what no butt chewing had ever accomplished and that the young man was now one of the best waitstaff they'd ever had.)

RE: Social Security / POLITICIANS

God's problem now...

When the graveside service had no more than terminated,

there was a tremendous burst of thunder accompanied by a

distant lightning bolt and more rumbling thunder.

A little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said,

"Well, she's there..."

RE: Thur & Fri 2/21 & 2/22 Need your Kudos...

I can feel the psychic in me coming out: You're reading this roughly twelve hours after I originally typed it and...























You did fine!

Congrats!


...Don...

RE: BEST ADVICE YOU EVER HEARD

Never let your mother brush your hair when she's mad at your dad!

RE: Is this a new trend??

Awwww... Thanks Burt! You're still the King in my book!

Hey - I just got a little outboard for my beat up old rowboat so now, if you get a chance to make it down this summer, we'll be able to go upstream too!

RE: Is this a new trend??

Well, Ma'am, let me put it like this:

I don't know that it's new trend, per se, but this is the reason that I am still here:

I met the wonderful lady who became my wife thanks to CS. Part of our courtship involved the ability to send virtual flowers. Even though we were married in August of 2007, our courtship is an ongoing, living thing and we continue to send each other virtual flowers as well as e-cards through CS. And even when I occasionally take a break from the forums, I remain a member simply for the ability to send the aforementioned flowers to the light of my life.

Speaking of the forums: I understand that I am tolerated by most, appreciated by a few and largely ignored by the rest. Pretty much like real life! And, like real life, I've made some friends here which - due to my ineptitude with e-mail addresses and phone numbers - are easier to keep in touch with via CS. I keep coming back because even though there are threads that I don't participate in - quite a few of which I don't even read - the average I.Q. here seems to be a notch or two above the norm. And the subjects are diverse and interesting. Sometimes even downright thought provoking and inspiring.

To that end, I'll mention that I belong to other forums, but they are geared towards specific areas of interest and I find the diversity of topics here on CS quite refreshing.

So now you have an answer straight from one of those that you were wondering about.

In all honesty, it never occured to me that someone might find my presence here (being UN-single, and all) disturbing or offensive or think that my motives for remaining here were anything but honorable, but I suppose that I can concede the point.

Sure hope this helps answer your questions.


...Don...

RE: Do Remember?

100%! (One more nominee for the Old Farts Club )

Gentle Thoughts for Today...

Good morning, everyone!

Gentle Thoughts for Today...

...Birds of a feather flock together and crap on your car.

When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog
run to the end of his chain and gag himself.

A penny saved is a government oversight.

The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the
right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting
moment.

The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then
your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a
replacement.

He who hesitates is probably right.

Did you ever notice: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are 'XL.'

If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.

If you can smile when things go wrong , you have someone in mind to
blame.

The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's
really in trouble.

There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it.
For exampl e I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles
don't hurt .

Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words 'The' and 'IRS' together
it spells 'Theirs.'

Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your
age and start bragging about it.

The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.

Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know why I look this way; I've traveled a long way and a lot of the roads weren't paved.

When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of
Algebra.

You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.

One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a
nice change from being young.

Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.

First you forget names, then you forget faces. Then you forget to pull
up your zipper. It's worse when you forget to pull it down.

Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf .


Lord, Keep your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth,
AMEN.

Soooo... The phone rings a couple of times this afternoon and...

Yes Ma'am, the break has indeed been nice, but I've also been feeling kinda' useless lately and it'll be good to have an income again.

Jeff,

I kinda' felt like I got a bum deal, too, but damn! I'm really feeling vindicated right now!

Everybody!

Soooo... The phone rings a couple of times this afternoon and...

The first time, it was my next door neighbor and long lost fishing buddy from up in Kansas - Haven't talked to him since last March - and we spent 45 minutes getting caught up on things. I think I've got him talked into saving his pennies and coming down this summer to go fishing with me for a week or so.

Then we hung up so that he could get ready work and I no sooner got the cell phone back in the sheath when the darn rang again!

This time it was a guy named Jerry. He does the hiring for Darkstar Transportation and he's been wading through applications for the past week or so - They got 2 empty trucks (needing drivers) and he's gotten something on the order of 50 or 60 applications from different drivers (4 just from my old company alone!). And so one thing led to another and HE CALLED TO OFFER ME A JOB!!!!

I go down to take my pre-employment drugscreen tomorrow morning and should be back on the road by next Monday!!!

I had a run of bad luck with the accident I had two weeks ago today, but knowing that I beat out so many other drivers despite the accident, well....


I'M FEELING PRETTY DARN GOOD RIGHT NOW!

RE: New from Indiana

Wellll... There are those of us here who have been chased by men with nets, if that answers your question?

RE: Mention a name... :) ...

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ 1234567890 !@#$%^&*()_+-={}|[]\:";'<>?,./~`

There! Now I know I've covered everyone!

RE: Euphemisms for certain phrases or words

Ok, now for a few actual ones:

The often grassy strip in the middle of a highway.
U.S.A.: Median
UK: The reservation.

Reservation.
U.S.A: Land blocks established by the government for the purpose re-locating/controlling American Indians.
UK: The often grassy strip in the middle of a highway.

Truck used for freight transportation.
U.S.A: Semi, big truck, Tractor trailer.
UK: Lorry

Lorry
U.S.A.: Girl's name (multiple spellings) popular in the 20th century.
UK: Tractor trailer, semi, big truck.

RE: Distance.

I now live 1100 miles from where I did this time last year and I'm really, truly at home for the first time in my life.

2 hours is nothing! You waste more time than that each week with frivolous activities.

Or look at it like this: The time I've spent being blissfully happy in the last year has already exceeded my drive time (moving included!) by considerably more than a hundred percent!

So, if it's "return on investment" that you're concerned about, then ask yourself this: "What's two hours compared to what may be the rest of my life?"

RE: Home

Congrats you two! Kinda' neat when it happens, ain't it?

RE: energy drinks

Most energy drinks contain high amounts of caffein and sugar and aren't really all that good for you. Caffein affects different people in different ways and that may be why you didn't feel anything.

There is a product on the market called 5 Hour Energy which does work and contains all natural ingredients and vitamins. I've never really felt an energy boost, but I suppose that's because it's kind've a sustained release type of product. I do know that their claims of "no crash" afterwords are true, as I've used it for quite some time as a dietary supplement as well as to help maintain my alertness level in the afternoon when I'd be napping if I were at home.

RE: Eat it at your own risk.

Hey Leo! How's it going?

I've been in survival situations where I've eaten things that would make a buzzard puke. And I've been with a vegetarian survival expert who "grazed" his way across a mountain meadow with no more food preparation than to wipe the dirt off on an incredibly filthy pair of blue jeans.

If I had a place to store it, I'd gladly take a fair portion of the beef off their hands, as it's also been reported that there have been no known illnesses related to the aforementioned hamburger...

RE: Mention a name... :) ...

Awwww... Thank you. Kind words indeed!



Without detracting from my already too short list, I'd like to briefly elucidate about three here who really stand out to me, personally.

Dave - For laughing at me and for making me laugh, even when neither of us was being funny.

Pamela - For unwittingly providing the catalyst that led to the rest of my life.

Jackson - For all of the obvious reasons and most of the selfish ones. And as much as we both love J.T., I still think - from my point of view - Don Williams said it best:

In the Shelter of Your Eyes

In the shelter of your eyes,
I have fin'ly found my song.
'Took so long to realize
I just can't make it on my own.

Words are only what they say
But this feelin' isn't wrong.
I'm so glad I found my way;
It's good to be where I belong.

And I'm gonna' stay right here 'cause I'm
In rythm with your mind
Tune out the world and rest my head
'Neath the shelter of your eyes...

...Words are only what they say...
But this feelin' isn't wrong.
I'm so glad I found my way;
It's good to be where I belong!

And I'm gonna' stay right here 'cause I'm
In rythm with your mind -
Tune out the world and rest my head
'Neath the shelter of your eyes...

RE: True love?

And then some!

RE: What three words your friend would use to describe you???

He's

My

Friend

(Those are the only words that are really needed.)

RE: meaning of life

I saw the movie and I've been on a cattle drive. One is more fun than the other, but only if you enjoy hard work, horses and campfire coffee...

And Jack Palance was right.

RE: Rude not to reply to messages?

I don't know that it's rude to not respond - Some people here get literally hundreds of messages each week. Seems like responding to each and every one would take waaaay too much time.

Having said that, I will admit that I, personally, try to respond to each message I get - Even if it's only to tell a scammer that they've been reported to the moderators. Fortunately, even before I met my wife here, a loaded mailbox wasn't something I really had to worry about too much...