SMUGGLING
Old joke - I hate people who take drugs. Like Customs officials.Smuggling is bad, smuggling affects the economy of your country, it's a naughty thing to do. It has also been a UK tradition since about 2 days after the first introduction of import tax, boats whisking back and forth across the Channel by dead of night, Customs officials hurriedly created, and a very quiet war has raged ever since.
I smuggle one thing - cigs. I've been caught once, and had 5 cartons confiscated
but on the whole I was lucky and my last few trips to the Continong have been to countries in the EU, where you can bring back as much as you are likely to need to turn your lungs into kippered flappy bits of cardboard. 
Since I was in Spain in March, and in Portugal in April, it's been a while since I had to buy at UK prices. My last carton had packets of 20 cigs, from Portugal, with the price pre-stamped on them, 4.20 euros, so the carton was 42 euros. That's Portuguese law, the price is set by the government across all brands.
So I bought this morning - 68 smackers for a carton of 10 packets.
Now guess how many cigs there are in each packet. Go on. Guess.
SEVENTEEN.
So I guess I'm about to turn smuggler. That's just GREEDY, Britain. GREEDY.
Comments (32)
If our first minister Nicola Sturgeon promises to cut tax on cigs if we separate from the UK, it will be a landslide victory, she'll for sure have my vote.
If she doesn't, forget it. Yup, my vote is THAT selfish - or put it another way, I'm THAT angry. The tax we pay on cigs pretty much props up the NHS but there's talk of refusing treatment to smokers for ANY illnesses, not smoking related ones. REALLY??????????????????
Going to have a cup of coffee and a quick smoke to cool down.
Then I'll look up flights to see where I can shoot off to for a weekend away. My holidays to both Spain and Portugal are literally free because of the savings I make on cigs. Can that even be right?
Greedy, greedy, greedy, greedy, GREEDY.
Anyone in an EU country with cheap cigs, want to meet up for coffee very, very soon?
It was my impetus for quitting a couple of years back, tbh
I see it as bolstering up a flagging economy. ¡Viva España!
Us EU citizens are supposed to help each other, ya'know
I shall also stop drinking, that one's easy, not much milked from this cash cow on that front.
If I also stop driving, that will mean giving up my job and living on benefits. Hmm. Lots of writing time. Starting to sound good ...
A hero about to be cut off from the common market ...
Silver linings and all that
As it happened, every year it stuck to the original plan. Gordon Brown, and the next Chancellor, and the next, stood there looking innocent saying 'no increase on alcohol' and there were cheers in the pubs. No increase on top of the automatic increase would have been a little more honest.
Honesty and politic-speak, what was I thinking
Oh, there was an increase on cider. The government noticed people were starting to enjoy cider. ZAPPPPPPPPPPPPP.
Here we aim to help those ripped off by taxes on essential ciggys, 17 per pack for that price, The gods have gone crazy, There are some newer brands here going for €2.50 a pack of 20.
My hotel for disenchanted smokers is always open!
Oh, and bringing a starter pack of some 10 lady bunnies (defanged) and 2 bucks. With any luck they will breed like, well, rabbits, and I will be able to contribute towards our meals and even start exporting shrink wrapped rabbit steaks.
Oh, and pardner, what do you think we could do with rabbit biltong?
I'm
on FIRESMOKIN'. One cigarette, and just look at all those ideas?OB, I actually enjoy smoking, I didn't before I gave up a number of years ago, restarted 18 months ago and like it, Its still accepted here in my part of Spain and smokers are not treated like they have leprosy.
Yup they could target industrial pollution but oops that might upset big business and politicians don't like to upset big business.
Don't suppose an old pirate like you could point me in the right direction for that crew, could you?
What am I even talking about, I don't even have a pipe so don't need a rake (?) or rack or anything pipe related
Just sayin'
Why are there only 17 in your packs?
So the last time I bought here there were 19 to a pack. Then I stocked up massively on various holidays and haven't had to buy again, no idea why we have lost 2 more cigs since. The Great God Profit at a guess, though.
I believe a carton of regular cigs (and by the way if I bought Marlboro, my preferred cig, it would be £8.20 a pack, I bought the factory sweepings cigs) actually costs around 11 quid. Most of the extra 57 quid goes to the Treasury, with a wee bit to the trader.
Itchy, Nat King Cole smoked like a trooper even when his doctors said he was seriously damaging his health, just to keep his husky voice, killed him in the end so you were right to quit
Life's a gamble. My ex mum in law was fanatically healthy, watched her diet carefully all her life, did just the right amount of exercise to keep herself in top physical shape, and it paid off, I guess, she died at 91 a few weeks ago. Up to the last month she was still spry and full of energy. Unfortunately her mind folded its tent and left some years ago.
As the old joke goes, I knew a man who gave up smoking, drinking, rich foods and took up jogging. He was in fantastic shape right up to the moment he was run over by a bus.
Anyway, this blog's done, I think. I've been challenged to try a sort of CS Cluedo. (Clue in some countries) Aye, that'll be right
Still - I wish someone would. I'd love to play!