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7 Dating Myths You Should IGNORE

7 Dating Myths You Should IGNORE

Are you ready to find a relationship? There are many myths that can lead you down the wrong path when considering who you should date. These misconceptions can keep you from choosing the right partner, or from getting into a relationship at all. Here are 7 myths that you should disregard when you are searching for Mr. or Mrs. Right.

1. It's better to be unhappy with a partner than to be alone.

Many people would rather be in a relationship than be single. They like the intimacy and happiness they get from being with a partner. They fear being alone and lonely. Although being in a relationship is great, there are also benefits to being single. The truth is that you can be just as happy on your own as you can in a relationship. And you can be just as lonely in a bad relationship. Being single and being lonely aren't the same thing at all. In fact, it's better to be alone than to be in a relationship that brings you down or makes you unhappy. When you don't have someone special in your life, fill your time with friends and hobbies or new experiences. Enjoy your freedom. Don't settle for someone that makes you less than happy, just for the sake of being in a relationship.

2. Only date someone you are attracted to.

Sometimes, people fall in love at first sight. Happily married men have been known to see their future wives for the first time and spontaneously proclaim to their bemused, dubious friends, "I'm going to marry that woman." However, equally amazing relationships arise from couples that were friends first. Give your friendships the chance to develop into something greater. Instant attraction and lasting love don't have to go hand-in-hand. Attraction can grow over time. You may discover that a love was lying there sleeping all along.

3) Men and women are from different planets.

Although there are some predictable, stereotypical differences between men and woman, all human beings experience the same emotions. Both sexes curse each other with equal outrage when they are dumped or hurt in a relationship. Women may stereotypically want marriage more than men, but marriage fulfills both sexes equally. In the end, we are all more or less the same. We are all hurt when we are betrayed, are happy when a loved one does something thoughtful, and become giddy when a crush calls us back. You don't need a decoder ring to understand the opposite sex.

4. Intimacy gets boring over time.

Physical attraction is undeniably exciting with somebody new. As the newness of the relationship wears off, some couples do let sex fall by the wayside. But other couples let the meaning of their intimacy deepen, and their mutual trust and love make it even better. Being with the same person for a long time is undeniably different than being with someone new, but you decide what that difference is. And you can always try something different to spice it up!

5. I can change him or her.

Stereotypically, it is women that set out to change men. The truth is, you can't change anybody except for yourself. You may have already tried this with your family members or your friends. Did it work? No. You can't choose your family, but you can choose your lover. Choose the one who is already what you want, because that is what you are going to get. Repeat...Choose the one who is already what you want, because that is what you are going to get. People can be works in progress, but they are in charge of the direction of their own change - and no one is going to appreciate you trying to make him or her something different.

6. My childhood was dysfunctional, so I am doomed to dysfunctional relationships.

We don't choose where we come from, but we do choose who we are today. You may have had a less than ideal relationship with your mother or father. Perhaps your parents got a divorce, or you never knew one of them at all. It is undeniable that what happened to you as a child has impacted you, but you can improve your ability to be in a relationship. Read self-help books that apply to your situation, or go see a therapist to work through your issues. It won't happen overnight, but you can heal whatever wounds are hurting you. Be forthcoming with your partner about your fears and your past. An accepting partner won't judge you for what you have been through. It may help him or her understand where you are coming from and support you in your journey.

7. Fighting is bad.

Disagreements are natural and unavoidable. How you handle and work them out with your partner is what defines your relationship. If you are having serious disagreements, use them as an opportunity to communicate better and become stronger as a couple. Seek to illuminate your point and understand where your partner is coming from. Never verbally attack your partner or call him or her names. Fighting fair builds trust with your partner. And you can agree to disagree: you have two minds, not one.

Have you spotted any myths in this list that you believe? Not one of them will get you closer to having a happy, healthy relationship. Having the right mindset is essential in the dating world today. Don't let these myths cloud your judgment, or keep you away from the person that you are supposed to be with. Ignoring these myths will let you have realistic expectations concerning your love life, and help you find a healthy and happy relationship.

Comments (2)

It is an article suggesting YOU give up on old wives tales.They are baseless and may very well stand in the way of you finding what you want.
This is more a piece about how the author thinks that people should be, in their ideal world, then how they actually are.

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