(Coninuation of snow shoveler)
December 20Electricity is back on, but had another 14 inches of the dang stuff last night. More shoveling! Took all
day. The snowplow came by twice. Tried to find a neighbor kid to shovel, but they said they’re too busy playing hockey. I think they’re lying. Called the only hardware store around to see about buying a snow blower and they’re out. Might have another shipment in March. I think they’re lying. Bob says I have to shovel or the city will have it done and bill me. I think he’s lying.
December 22
Bob was right about a white Christmas because 13 more inches of the white crap fell today, and it’s so cold, it probably won’t melt till August. Took me 45 minutes to get all dressed up to go out to shovel and then I had to go to the bathroom. By the time I got undressed, made a visit to the bathroom and dressed again. I was too tired to shovel. Tried to hire Bob who has a plow on his truck for the rest of the winter, but he says he’s too busy. I think he’s is lying.
December 23
Only 2 inches of snow today. And it warmed up to 0. The wife wanted me to decorate the front of the house this morning. What is she, nuts?!! Why didn’t she tell me to do that a month ago? She says she did but I think she’s lying.
December 24
6 inches – Snow packed so hard by snowplow, I broke the shovel. Thought I was having a heart attack. If I ever catch that snowplow driver, I’ll drag him through the snow by his hair and beat him to death with my broken shovel. I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling and then he comes down the street at a 100 miles an hour and throws snow all over where I’ve just been! Tonight the wife wanted me to sing Christmas carols with her and open our presents, but I was too busy watching for the snowplow.
December 25
Merry Christmas! 20 more inches of the slop tonight – Snowed in. The idea of shoveling makes my blood boil. I hate the snow! Then the snowplow driver came by asking for a donation and I hit him over the head with my shovel. The wife says I have a bad attitude. I think she’s a fricking idiot. If I have to watch “It’s A Wonderful Life” one more time, I’m going to stuff her into the microwave.
December 26
Still snowed in. Why the hell did I ever move here? It was all HER idea. She’s really getting on my nerves.
December 27
Temperature dropped to -30 and the pipes froze; plumber came after 14 hours of waiting for him, he
only charged me $1,400 to replace all my pipes.
December 28
Warmed up to above -20. Still snowed in. She is driving me crazy!!!
December 29
10 more inches. Bob says I have to shovel the roof or it could cave in. That’s the silliest thing I ever heard. How dumb does he think I am?
December 30
Roof caved in. I beat up the snow plow driver, and now he is suing me for a million dollars, not only for the beating I gave him, but also for trying to shove the broken snow shovel up his rearend. The wife went home to her mother. Nine more inches predicted.
December 31
I set fire to what’s left of the house. No more shoveling.
January 8
Feel so good. I just love those little white pills they keep giving me. Why am I tied to the bed?
Comments (11)
It would be funny...
if it weren't all so terribly true!
TWENTY INCHES?!
I wonder if Helena is jealous
I hear you. In 2008, here in southern WI., we got 108". It snowed into May that year. I went to Florida that fall and stayed thru the next winter!
I hate snow!
It looks like we are out of the deep freeze today! Upper 30's and Wed., mid 40's!
Thank you! In Florida, the Iguanas (Florida lizards) are freezing and falling from trees and bushes!
Getting better this week!
"Former Vice President Al Gore has weighed in on the record cold and snow in the U.S. "It's bitter cold in parts of the US, but climate scientist Dr. Michael Mann explains that's exactly what we should expect from the climate crisis," Gore wrote on January 4 on Twitter.
"Gore linked to one of his organizations' articles on the brutal winter weather written by Climategate professor Michael Mann: The Climate Reality Project: A 'PERFECT STORM': EXTREME WINTER WEATHER, BITTER COLD, AND CLIMATE CHANGE
"In the Gore touted article, Mann linked the cold and "lots of snow" to "climate change."'
My stomach is sore laughing.
Does it really get that bad?:here in Capetown we drives many miles to the mountains near Ceres to see a bit of snow falling and by the time you get there it's over.
More of the wisdom of Environment-AL...
Al Gore: ‘Bitter cold’ is ‘exactly what we should expect from the climate crisis’
Former Vice President Al Gore has weighed in on the record cold and snow in the U.S. “It’s bitter cold in parts of the US, but climate scientist Dr. Michael Mann explains that’s exactly what we should expect from the climate crisis,” Gore wrote on January 4 on Twitter.
Gore linked to one of his organizations’ articles on the brutal winter weather written by Climategate professor Michael Mann: The Climate Reality Project: A ‘PERFECT STORM’: EXTREME WINTER WEATHER, BITTER COLD, AND CLIMATE CHANGE
In the Gore touted article, Mann linked the cold and “lots of snow” to “climate change.”
Gore’s Oscar-winning documentary An Inconvenient Truth did not warn of record cold and increasing snowfalls as a consequence of man-made global warming. And as recently as 2009, Gore was hyping the lack of snow as evidence for man-made global warming. Source: “Gore Reports Snow and Ice Across the World Vanishing Quickly.”
Other climate activists warned of less cold and snow as well.
Flashback 2000: ‘Snowfalls are now just a thing of the past’ – ‘Children just aren’t going to know what snow is’ – UK Independent
But as the snow piled up, the climate change claims were adjusted and cold and snow was added to the list of things caused by “global warming.” See: Warmists Wheel Out “Record Cold Due To Global Warming” Argument Again
In 2010, Gore claimed “increased heavy snowfalls are completely consistent with… man-made global warming.”
Predictions of less snow and less severe winters were hammered into the public by global warming scientists. But once that predictions failed to come true, the opposite of what they predicted instead became—what they expected.
If “climate change” is causing record cold and snow, then it would stand to reason that Gore is suggesting that if the U.S. had ratified the UN’s Kyoto Protocol treaty on “global warming” back in the 1990’s — the winter of 2018 would have been warmer?
Reality Check: But scientists are not buying the claims of Gore and Mann and others linking the record cold and snow to “global warming.”
Read more at Climate Depot
Snow is melting here now
My apologies for heisting the vid from your comment on cat's 'Global Warming' blog, string.