Cliques, good or bad? (55)
chris27292729IOS island, South Aegean Greece93 Threads 15,811 Posts2intrigued: I have a few friends on the site like many of us do and I wouldn't consider those types of friendships as being a clique.
The clique giveth, and the clique taketh away.
Cliques are for people with low self esteem
pinkdiamond3: Cliques are for people with low self esteem
For nearly 30 years I've been meeting up with four other friends who I went to sixth form college with.
It started when we decided to go camping for a week after we finished our final exams and before we all went our separate ways to five different universities. We enjoyed our holiday and each other's company so much, ever since we try to get together for a weekend once a year, either camping, or hiring a cottage.
We're a small group and we've never invited anyone else, so we fit the definition of a clique.
Why do you think we might have low self-esteem because we have these get-togethers?
minnieme2: Have no time for them. I'd pick 2, 4, 5, 6, 8 and 10, especially 4-6.
Feel sorry for the weak ones, who're afraid to do anything on their own.
Feel sorry for the weak ones, who're afraid to do anything on their own.
I don't like them...and I'm certainly not part of one
jac_the_gripper: For nearly 30 years I've been meeting up with four other friends who I went to sixth form college with.
It started when we decided to go camping for a week after we finished our final exams and before we all went our separate ways to five different universities. We enjoyed our holiday and each other's company so much, ever since we try to get together for a weekend once a year, either camping, or hiring a cottage.
We're a small group and we've never invited anyone else, so we fit the definition of a clique.
Why do you think we might have low self-esteem because we have these get-togethers?
could i camp outside.....just in case...you know...It started when we decided to go camping for a week after we finished our final exams and before we all went our separate ways to five different universities. We enjoyed our holiday and each other's company so much, ever since we try to get together for a weekend once a year, either camping, or hiring a cottage.
We're a small group and we've never invited anyone else, so we fit the definition of a clique.
Why do you think we might have low self-esteem because we have these get-togethers?
I have never been involved in one. Always kept myself to myself and gone my own way. 
Cliques? No, thanks...I prefer "Clinique" 
yuppers same here. I voted that I stick to myself, mind my own business and try to stay friends with everybody, mostly
felixis99: yuppers same here. I voted that I stick to myself, mind my own business and try to stay friends with everybody, mostly
that was supposed to be in response to 2intrigued. Forgot the quote button
minnieme2: Not all groups are cliques. I think most people know that.
The poll is about cliques and it's just a poll. If you want to be part of a clique, that's your choice.
The poll is about cliques and it's just a poll. If you want to be part of a clique, that's your choice.
that's right. there is a difference between a group of friends and a clique. when I was in school I was friends with everyone, really. there were a few cliques. my main group of friends was not a clique in my thinking because our group was "fluid" and most of us had friends in addition to the 6 to 10 of each other...we had guys in our group and if someone brought along someone else who was not usually on outings with us, that was fine.
Where as the cliques were, as I remember, less open to others and usually one gender.
Another thing I remember about some of the cliques (like the cheerleaders for example) is that if you got one or two of them away from their clique to talk or whatever, they were pretty nice.
But most out grew the clique thing by age 15 or 16
felixis99: that's right. there is a difference between a group of friends and a clique. when I was in school I was friends with everyone, really. there were a few cliques. my main group of friends was not a clique in my thinking because our group was "fluid" and most of us had friends in addition to the 6 to 10 of each other...we had guys in our group and if someone brought along someone else who was not usually on outings with us, that was fine.
Where as the cliques were, as I remember, less open to others and usually one gender.
Another thing I remember about some of the cliques (like the cheerleaders for example) is that if you got one or two of them away from their clique to talk or whatever, they were pretty nice.
But most out grew the clique thing by age 15 or 16
Where as the cliques were, as I remember, less open to others and usually one gender.
Another thing I remember about some of the cliques (like the cheerleaders for example) is that if you got one or two of them away from their clique to talk or whatever, they were pretty nice.
But most out grew the clique thing by age 15 or 16
One or two may be ok on their own, away from the influence. They're more than likely the weak ones. They should grow out of it in their later teens but some don't ever grow out of it.
Sounds like you had a nice group of friends felix.
minnieme2: One or two may be ok on their own, away from the influence. They're more than likely the weak ones. They should grow out of it in their later teens but some don't ever grow out of it.
Sounds like you had a nice group of friends felix.
Sounds like you had a nice group of friends felix.
yes Minnieme, fortunately I did. Was very lucky. I grew up in a small town...we could walk home, hang out after school....
What I meant when I said if you talk to a clique member away from their clique was that they were nice. I don't think that would make them "weak"
I would think it showed strength of personality to be able to stand on ones own away from their clique, as a teen especially. But maybe I didn't understand what you mean
One day, I'd like to set up a franchise of cliques that operates like pyramid sales. So there'd be 32 or 64 cliques who joined later, paying my clique huge royalties. Then I'd get a really nice car, then I'd get all the nice birds.
felixis99: yes Minnieme, fortunately I did. Was very lucky. I grew up in a small town...we could walk home, hang out after school....
What I meant when I said if you talk to a clique member away from their clique was that they were nice. I don't think that would make them "weak"
I would think it showed strength of personality to be able to stand on ones own away from their clique, as a teen especially. But maybe I didn't understand what you mean
What I meant when I said if you talk to a clique member away from their clique was that they were nice. I don't think that would make them "weak"
I would think it showed strength of personality to be able to stand on ones own away from their clique, as a teen especially. But maybe I didn't understand what you mean
No you're fine, I just meant they could be. Not definitely. But you could say that if they're nice and have strength of character, why would they want to be in a clique at all? No accounting for some I suppose! Good luck to them.
Of course there are always going to be the person that because of there attitude is not welcome in a group and then label that group as a clique, instead of recognising that it is there attitude towards others is a problem.
I've never been part of a clique and usually I don't care that I'm always the outsider. Wouldn't waste time wondering what it is like to be in one...
Oh No now you're making me paranoid I suppose what you are saying could be true, but sometimes not we might not want to be involved in a specific group.... I have never wanted to hang out in the men's locker after practive, for example
I suppose what you are saying could be true, but sometimes not we might not want to be involved in a specific group.... I have never wanted to hang out in the men's locker after practive, for exampleminnieme2: No you're fine, I just meant they could be. Not definitely. But you could say that if they're nice and have strength of character, why would they want to be in a clique at all? No accounting for some I suppose! Good luck to them.
well when I think of cliques I think of young people mostly....teens and I think it can be a normal part of growing up for many people that they ourgrow. Adults in cliques? That I have no explanation for
felixis99: Oh No now you're making me paranoid I suppose what you are saying could be true, but sometimes not we might not want to be involved in a specific group.... I have never wanted to hang out in the men's locker after practive, for example
I bet you would have fun in a mens locker after the practice
Track16: I bet you would have fun in a mens locker after the practice
Ha ha, yeah just what I have always dreamed of ....getting slapped by wet towels with sweat flying everywhere....the odor of 4th quarter socks and foot powder, yum. No Thanks
felixis99: Ha ha, yeah just what I have always dreamed of ....getting slapped by wet towels with sweat flying everywhere....the odor of 4th quarter socks and foot powder, yum. No Thanks
I wouldn't slap you with a wet towel :)
There might be some cliques out there that aren't as bad as others, I suppose. And, can we really eliminate this trend? As long as people continue to form cliques, and/or be a part, they will exist in one way or another. In my adult life (I believe junior high and high school cliques are a different matter...) two times of dealing with this were especially irksome. For years I belonged to a social music foundation that was dominated by several cliques, which in turn, belonged to other cliques. It was a giant clique of cliques. As a whole, this group was passively-aggressive condescending and patronizing to members or guests (...but not ALL...they hand-picked favorite newbies..) and after many years of being frustrated with them, I stopped going. Another situation was being invited to participate in open mikes at a particular saloon. (Different group altogether). It became glaringly apparent that the core group was showcasing itself, and other musicians and singers were brushed off, or told to wait these ungodly periods of time (when the saloon was almost empty) to do their number or skit or whatever. It was a thinly veiled use of this establishment to promote themselves. Gee, I think I hate cliques, too.....not good karma.
Track16: I bet you would have fun in a mens locker after the practice
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