Whew, a very tricky situation. I know it is difficult for you to see him making what appears to be a big mistake, but unfortunately, as everyone else has said; he has to follow his own path and see the light himself. You have tried to tell him and show him but he doesn't want to see it, OR perhaps you don't know the full story.
Perhaps you need to take a different approach, and try to get to know her a bit better? I think rather than accusing her of being a drunk and a druggie, you should try to talk to your dad and tell him you love him and your behaviour thus far has been out of concern for him. Perhaps empathising with him and telling him you would like to understand his reasons for staying with her might help?
You then need to listen and respect his decision, even if you don't agree with it. If you find it difficult to be around her, rather be honest with your father and tell him you're going to take a step back but, in the words of the song: "all you need to do is call, and I'll be there".... Don't feel usurped by this woman. You are his daughter - that's a very different relationship and a different kind of love.
Yup that would be about right!!! The EQ vs IQ debate... But in all seriousness, intelligence needs to include a certain amount of "streetwise". It's all very well being super intelligent, but if you don't have any social skills or common sense, I'd rather do without you...
Please don't go....... don't go...ohohohoh don't go away... please don't go....... don't go...ohohohoh we're beggin you to stay.....
He shops in the shoe shops all the day long shoppin and boppin and singin his song all the little birdies on CS Street are waitin for him to go tweet tweet tweet
Figuratively NOT literally... It could take anything from a little fan to something like the 5,000+ megawatt Titan wind installation in South Dakota to get some of you guys up there flapping those wings!!!!
What a meanie! Did you lose your job? Sometimes the universe works in strange ways. I hope if you did lose your job that you found a much better one, and also a better partner!
Ha ha! Reminds me of the book BIRDIE by William Wharton, which I loved!!! I have always wanted to fly unaided.... Have a safe flight Trueheart - please don't forget to stop and refuel!!! See ya in a few weeks???
But re: the latter, is it a lie if you believe it to be true at at the time? I am lucky not to have had to deal with betrayal, which I think takes a lot of time to heal from; but have definitely had to deal with lies. I always tell myself, they were lying to protect themselves - it was not directed intentionally to hurt me, in fact ironically usually a lie is because they don't WANT to hurt you, and I let it go. The alternative is to let it eat you up like a tapeworm - ewwww would rather not let it get any bigger and longer - would rather nip it in the bud!
Hi MP, yes there is a difference! You mentioned in the original post that he has NO worldy possessions. You did not explain that he was a minister. That is a completely different scenario! I think that is extremely admirable. In my mind, I was imagining some loser kind of guy... Making a decision to devote yourself to a cause and to attempt to make a difference in this world is not being a loser. I mentioned idealists in the sense that it is all very well to SAY you would live without material possessions, but I wonder how many people actually would in the long-term? I've lived in poverty, and it is not fun.
RE: What do you see in this equation?
Whew, a very tricky situation. I know it is difficult for you to see him making what appears to be a big mistake, but unfortunately, as everyone else has said; he has to follow his own path and see the light himself. You have tried to tell him and show him but he doesn't want to see it, OR perhaps you don't know the full story.Perhaps you need to take a different approach, and try to get to know her a bit better? I think rather than accusing her of being a drunk and a druggie, you should try to talk to your dad and tell him you love him and your behaviour thus far has been out of concern for him. Perhaps empathising with him and telling him you would like to understand his reasons for staying with her might help?
You then need to listen and respect his decision, even if you don't agree with it. If you find it difficult to be around her, rather be honest with your father and tell him you're going to take a step back but, in the words of the song: "all you need to do is call, and I'll be there".... Don't feel usurped by this woman. You are his daughter - that's a very different relationship and a different kind of love.
Good luck!