Here is a list of Dating & Relationships Blogs ordered by Most Commented, posted by members. A Blog is a journal you may enter about your life, thoughts, interesting experiences, or lessons you've learned. Post an opinion, impart words of wisdom, or talk about something interesting in your day. Update your blog on a regular basis, or just whenever you have something to say. Creating a blog is a good way to share something of yourself with others. Reading blogs is a good way to learn more about others. Click here to post a blog.
Things I don’t understand here. Part I.
Prelude:
The other day I had an exchange here with a younger man from another country:
Him: How are you doing?
Me (thinking “what exactly do people expect as an answer to that kind of questions?”): How am I doing what?
Him: It’s hello in English. I thought that you speak English.
Me (thinking “what led to that conclusion?”): Wrong assumption.
And that innocent remark made him to give birth to a tirade:
Him (verbatim): Well your profile is written in English ??? Am I missing something ? You sound very angry ? Divorced , old alone , your children don’t live with you , you sad ugly withered Old skank, you will never find anyone , enjoy being alone all the remainder of your miserable life , you horrible little woman
Yes, I am little. Never thought that it’s something one has to be ashamed of. Anyway, if my counterpart prefers tall, overweight, perhaps obese women, why did he contact me?
Yes, I am divorced. If my counterpart prefers married women, why did he contact me?
Yes, my child is grown-up and lives on her own. If my counterpart prefers 5 generation living under the same roof, why did he contact me?
Somebody, please, can explain me what is it that I don’t understand in this situation?
The other day I had an exchange here with a younger man from another country:
Him: How are you doing?
Me (thinking “what exactly do people expect as an answer to that kind of questions?”): How am I doing what?
Him: It’s hello in English. I thought that you speak English.
Me (thinking “what led to that conclusion?”): Wrong assumption.
And that innocent remark made him to give birth to a tirade:
Him (verbatim): Well your profile is written in English ??? Am I missing something ? You sound very angry ? Divorced , old alone , your children don’t live with you , you sad ugly withered Old skank, you will never find anyone , enjoy being alone all the remainder of your miserable life , you horrible little woman
Yes, I am little. Never thought that it’s something one has to be ashamed of. Anyway, if my counterpart prefers tall, overweight, perhaps obese women, why did he contact me?
Yes, I am divorced. If my counterpart prefers married women, why did he contact me?
Yes, my child is grown-up and lives on her own. If my counterpart prefers 5 generation living under the same roof, why did he contact me?
Somebody, please, can explain me what is it that I don’t understand in this situation?
The Online Disinhibition Effect
From
It's well known that people say and do things in cyberspace that they wouldn't ordinarily say or do in the face-to-face world. They loosen up, feel more uninhibited, express themselves more openly. Researchers call this the "disinhibition effect." It's a double-edged sword. Sometimes people share very personal things about themselves. They reveal secret emotions, fears, wishes. Or they show unusual acts of kindness and generosity.
On the other hand, the disinhibition effect may not be so benign. Out spills rude language and harsh criticisms, anger, hatred, even threats. Or people explore the dark underworld of the internet, places of pornography and violence, places they would never visit in the real world.
On the benign side, the disinhibition indicates an attempt to understand and explore oneself, to work through problems and find new ways of being. And sometimes, in toxic disinhibition, it is simply a blind catharsis, an acting out of unsavory needs and wishes without any personal growth at all.
What causes this online disinhibition? What is it about cyberspace that loosens the psychological barriers that block the release of these inner feelings and needs? I expand on these ingredients that contribute to the ODE.
You Don't Know Me (dissociative anonymity)
You Can't See Me (invisibility)
See You Later (asynchronicity)
It's All in My Head (solipsistic introjection)
It's Just a Game (dissociative imagination)
We're Equals (minimizing authority)
1. You Don't Know Me (dissociative anonymity)
As the word "anonymous" indicates, you can have no name - at least not your real name. That anonymity works wonders for the disinhibition effect. When people have the opportunity to separate their actions from their real world and identity, they feel less vulnerable about opening up. Whatever they say or do can't be directly linked to the rest of their lives. They don't have to own their behavior by acknowledging it within the full context of who they "really" are. When acting out hostile feelings, the person doesn't have to take responsibility for those actions. In fact, people might even convince themselves that those behaviors "aren't me at all." In psychology this is called "dissociation."
2.You Can't See Me (invisibility)
In many online environments other people cannot see you. You don't have to worry about how you look or sound when you say (type) something. You don't have to worry about how others look or sound when you say something. Seeing a frown, a shaking head, a sigh, a bored expression, and many other subtle and not so subtle signs of disapproval or indifference can slam the breaks on what people are willing to express. In psychoanalysis, the analyst sits behind the patient in order remain a physically ambiguous figure, without revealing any body language or facial expression, so that the patient has free range to discuss whatever he or she wants, without feeling inhibited by how the analyst is physically reacting. In everyday relationships, people sometimes avert their eyes when discussing something personal and emotional. It's easier not to look into the other's face. Text communication offers a built-in opportunity to keep one's eyes averted.
What about the other points? May people dicuss about those here? When we understand the bias of internet on our personality then we will understand us better in the context of our actions on cyber social media. Until that all the feedbacks we get will be misinterpreted and we will develope and grow an alter ego.
It's well known that people say and do things in cyberspace that they wouldn't ordinarily say or do in the face-to-face world. They loosen up, feel more uninhibited, express themselves more openly. Researchers call this the "disinhibition effect." It's a double-edged sword. Sometimes people share very personal things about themselves. They reveal secret emotions, fears, wishes. Or they show unusual acts of kindness and generosity.
On the other hand, the disinhibition effect may not be so benign. Out spills rude language and harsh criticisms, anger, hatred, even threats. Or people explore the dark underworld of the internet, places of pornography and violence, places they would never visit in the real world.
On the benign side, the disinhibition indicates an attempt to understand and explore oneself, to work through problems and find new ways of being. And sometimes, in toxic disinhibition, it is simply a blind catharsis, an acting out of unsavory needs and wishes without any personal growth at all.
What causes this online disinhibition? What is it about cyberspace that loosens the psychological barriers that block the release of these inner feelings and needs? I expand on these ingredients that contribute to the ODE.
You Don't Know Me (dissociative anonymity)
You Can't See Me (invisibility)
See You Later (asynchronicity)
It's All in My Head (solipsistic introjection)
It's Just a Game (dissociative imagination)
We're Equals (minimizing authority)
1. You Don't Know Me (dissociative anonymity)
As the word "anonymous" indicates, you can have no name - at least not your real name. That anonymity works wonders for the disinhibition effect. When people have the opportunity to separate their actions from their real world and identity, they feel less vulnerable about opening up. Whatever they say or do can't be directly linked to the rest of their lives. They don't have to own their behavior by acknowledging it within the full context of who they "really" are. When acting out hostile feelings, the person doesn't have to take responsibility for those actions. In fact, people might even convince themselves that those behaviors "aren't me at all." In psychology this is called "dissociation."
2.You Can't See Me (invisibility)
In many online environments other people cannot see you. You don't have to worry about how you look or sound when you say (type) something. You don't have to worry about how others look or sound when you say something. Seeing a frown, a shaking head, a sigh, a bored expression, and many other subtle and not so subtle signs of disapproval or indifference can slam the breaks on what people are willing to express. In psychoanalysis, the analyst sits behind the patient in order remain a physically ambiguous figure, without revealing any body language or facial expression, so that the patient has free range to discuss whatever he or she wants, without feeling inhibited by how the analyst is physically reacting. In everyday relationships, people sometimes avert their eyes when discussing something personal and emotional. It's easier not to look into the other's face. Text communication offers a built-in opportunity to keep one's eyes averted.
What about the other points? May people dicuss about those here? When we understand the bias of internet on our personality then we will understand us better in the context of our actions on cyber social media. Until that all the feedbacks we get will be misinterpreted and we will develope and grow an alter ego.
which will you prefer
which partner will you prefer a naging partner or a lady partner
I HATE THAT MOMENT WHEN MY ANGER TURNS TO TEARS
Being sensitive is just normal.
But when it strikes you with pain more often we tend to
get MAD
and ask "why me" and beyond that anger ...
comes unexpected. ....like c**se. ..
All you have to do is just cry it out
need a hug now.
But when it strikes you with pain more often we tend to
get MAD
and ask "why me" and beyond that anger ...comes unexpected. ....like c**se. ..
All you have to do is just cry it out
need a hug now.
Feminism....the necessary evolution
Feminism...I have wrote many blogs about it....I would say objectively challenging women to their ways...to the best of my knowledge. It was not to form judgment, but more for bringing better understanding, for myself and for perhaps others.
Back in traditional relationships, the woman's beauty...by many...was cherished more than her being....her vag more than her brain.
....the behavior of both men and women supported those rolls.
Now...feminism....50% divorce....independence....self-defense....lesbianism....increased women work force...
etc....
What happened...is a question that comes to my mind.
Ever since becoming single, about 10 years ago, I have studied women to reduce the odds of becoming involved in a similar ending relationship again. I am a firm believer in learning from my mistakes in life and not to repeat them. I have only ever been with one woman in my life; therefore, I was by no means an expert in that department. So, how do I learn more...I wondered. Wondering no more, a friend of mine introduced me to the internet being a huge resource for learning about women. He recommended me listen to pick up artists. There were a ton of them online, giving their advice on how to pick up women.
That was all fine and dandy. I figured my problem with my previous relationship was that I didn't understand what women valued in a man, a relationship. So, I began to listen to these pick up artists...listening to all the success they were having with women and how their students are becoming masters themselves. Okay, I thought...that is fine...but, I am not looking to meet countless women, I am trying to figure out what women value in a man for a long term relationship. So, I listened and listened and listened....for about 5 years or so. Even today, the friend who turned me on to this information, still talks about pick up strategy....even 10 years later. continued below....
Back in traditional relationships, the woman's beauty...by many...was cherished more than her being....her vag more than her brain.
....the behavior of both men and women supported those rolls.
Now...feminism....50% divorce....independence....self-defense....lesbianism....increased women work force...
etc....
What happened...is a question that comes to my mind.
Ever since becoming single, about 10 years ago, I have studied women to reduce the odds of becoming involved in a similar ending relationship again. I am a firm believer in learning from my mistakes in life and not to repeat them. I have only ever been with one woman in my life; therefore, I was by no means an expert in that department. So, how do I learn more...I wondered. Wondering no more, a friend of mine introduced me to the internet being a huge resource for learning about women. He recommended me listen to pick up artists. There were a ton of them online, giving their advice on how to pick up women.
That was all fine and dandy. I figured my problem with my previous relationship was that I didn't understand what women valued in a man, a relationship. So, I began to listen to these pick up artists...listening to all the success they were having with women and how their students are becoming masters themselves. Okay, I thought...that is fine...but, I am not looking to meet countless women, I am trying to figure out what women value in a man for a long term relationship. So, I listened and listened and listened....for about 5 years or so. Even today, the friend who turned me on to this information, still talks about pick up strategy....even 10 years later. continued below....
NO PROFILE PIC FUSTRATEING WHY HIDE ?
Why Do So Many Women On Here , have no profile picture how can you get attracted to a poor drawing .
A match made in heaven!!!
During a seminar, a woman asked," How do I know if I am with the right person?" 
The speaker then noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so he said, "It depends. Is that your partner?" In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?"
Here's the answer.
Every relationship has a cycle… In the beginning; you fall in love with your partner. You anticipate their calls, want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love.
People in love sometimes say, "I was swept off my feet."Picture the expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something happened TO YOU.
Falling in love is a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few months or years of being together, the euphoria of love fades. It's a natural cycle of EVERY relationship.
Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship; you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.
At this point, you and/or your partner might start asking, "Am I with the right person?" And as you reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when relationships breakdown. 
The key to succeeding in a relationship is NOT finding the right person; it's learning to love the person you found.
People blame their partners for their unhappiness and look outside for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes.
Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your relationship. It lies within it.
I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later.
Because...........
The key to succeeding in a Relationship is not finding the right person; it's learning to love the Person you found.
SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You have to work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it demands WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make it work. Make no mistake about it.
Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your partner), Just as there are physical laws Of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. If you know how to apply these laws, the results are predictable.
Love is therefore a "DECISION". Not just a feeling.
OMG!!! Why am I sharing relationship advice with singles????
Ok, when you find the wrong partner you can still love him/her perfectly and try making it last.
Wish everyone a blessed week!!!!!! 
The speaker then noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so he said, "It depends. Is that your partner?" In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?"
Here's the answer.
Every relationship has a cycle… In the beginning; you fall in love with your partner. You anticipate their calls, want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love.
People in love sometimes say, "I was swept off my feet."Picture the expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something happened TO YOU.
Falling in love is a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few months or years of being together, the euphoria of love fades. It's a natural cycle of EVERY relationship.
Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship; you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.
At this point, you and/or your partner might start asking, "Am I with the right person?" And as you reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when relationships breakdown.
The key to succeeding in a relationship is NOT finding the right person; it's learning to love the person you found.
People blame their partners for their unhappiness and look outside for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes.
Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your relationship. It lies within it.
I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later.
Because...........
The key to succeeding in a Relationship is not finding the right person; it's learning to love the Person you found.
SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You have to work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it demands WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make it work. Make no mistake about it.
Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your partner), Just as there are physical laws Of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. If you know how to apply these laws, the results are predictable.
Love is therefore a "DECISION". Not just a feeling.
OMG!!! Why am I sharing relationship advice with singles????
Ok, when you find the wrong partner you can still love him/her perfectly and try making it last.
Wish everyone a blessed week!!!!!!
what's the purpose of this site
Is this site suppose to be where single,lonely people suppose to meet each other,fall inlove or be friends.I doubt this its a mind playing game here some fools only view you too coward to even text you.Where's the real men on this site who has the guts to do what they suppose to do court woman,what the heck are some of you looking for you wasting my time and yours.Some do come on text you but then they fade into thin air no wonder you guys are still single you not committed enough to take on the full ride always doing things halve way.You are spineless immature boys that wants to play around are you keeping tabs to see just how much you can score get a life guys you suck big time
It's really over
So I was sitting in a Scottish pub garden last weekend, basking in the fierce Scottish sun as dogs collapsed panting and eggs fried on the sidewalk. I ordered a beer shandy and as the first icy frothing mouthful headed for those parts other drinks don't reach, the unusual taste triggered a Moment.
Picture it. I joined one of the biggest breweries in Europe in 2002, and for 10 years I was given a free case of the beer of my choice every month. It made me very popular with my neighbours, because I drink perhaps half a dozen beers a year, so I passed most of it on. In 2012 the brewery moved its accounts to another country and paid me very generously to go away - my redundancy payout was a year's salary - and I loyally continued to drink their brands when and if I drank beer.
Last weekend, I tasted a competitor's beer for the first time in 13 years. It wasn't as good. There's just something aboutAmstel um can I say the name?
Doors do close. Here's to windows
Picture it. I joined one of the biggest breweries in Europe in 2002, and for 10 years I was given a free case of the beer of my choice every month. It made me very popular with my neighbours, because I drink perhaps half a dozen beers a year, so I passed most of it on. In 2012 the brewery moved its accounts to another country and paid me very generously to go away - my redundancy payout was a year's salary - and I loyally continued to drink their brands when and if I drank beer.
Last weekend, I tasted a competitor's beer for the first time in 13 years. It wasn't as good. There's just something about
Doors do close. Here's to windows
Over
It's over now!
wish every piece of me was frozen to be free of feelings.
Didn't anticipate his touching, his presence in my life might be such hurtful when it is over.
Now i m scared of everything, especially feelings and hopes.
Should all these tears be enough to exhaust this burning heart, pain would not have reached me this deep
wish every piece of me was frozen to be free of feelings.
Didn't anticipate his touching, his presence in my life might be such hurtful when it is over.
Now i m scared of everything, especially feelings and hopes.
Should all these tears be enough to exhaust this burning heart, pain would not have reached me this deep
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