Pillsbury Doughboy Is Dead
The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes in the belly.He was 71.
Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin.
Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies and Captain Crunch.
The grave site was piled high with flours.
Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded.
Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes.
Despite being a little flaky at times, he still, as a crusty old man, was considered a roll model for millions.
Doughboy is survived by his wife, Play Dough; two children John Dough and Jane Dough; plus they had one in the oven.
He is also survived by his elderly father Pop Tart.
The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.
Comments (11)
Iyyov
He's made of dough
(He had to be baked though)
Oh no! poems? Here I Go!
A doughty fellow
Or is that doughy?
Not with marshmallow
But still quite showy
He won't mind, there's other dough men
They're humble fellows and not showmen
The cooking smells provide an omen
For what will come soon
From the oven
Made of flour, and yeast, it's true
(And other stuff they won't tell you)
Nonetheless, the effect is clear
Have a taste, just bite his ear!
After that,
You will see
The doughman's made
Deliciously!