Ponderisms for Seniors

I don't need anger management. I need people to stop ticking me off!

Old age is coming at a really bad time!

When I was a child I thought Nap Time was a punishment ... Now, as a grown up, it just feels like a small vacation!

The biggest lie I tell myself is ... "I don't need to write that down, I'll remember it."

Lord, grant me the strength to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the friends to post my bail when I finally snap!

I don't have gray hair. I have "wisdom highlights.” I'm very wise.

My people skills are just fine. It's my tolerance to idiots that needs work.

Teach your daughter how to shoot, because a restraining order is just a piece of paper.

If God wanted me to touch my toes, He would’ve put them on my knees.

The kids text me "plz" which is shorter than please. I text back "no" which is shorter than "yes”.

I'm going to retire and live off of my savings. Not sure what I'll do that second week.

When did it change from "We the people" to "screw the people"?

Even duct tape can't fix stupid ... But it can muffle the sound!

Why do I have to press one for English when you're just going to transfer me to someone I can't understand anyway?

Lord, Give me patience and give it to me NOW.

Of course I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice.

Oops! Did I roll my eyes out loud?

At my age "getting lucky" means walking into a room and remembering what I was wanting!
rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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Comments (10)

Jim,wave hug

applause cheering cheering I'm getting my wisdom highlights.grin
Hi Jim.
I think most apply to me.laugh
cheers thumbs up
Hi Jim rolling on the floor laughing laugh Priceless! laugh really enjoyed your blog bouquet hug
Hi Jim, it's that what did I come in here for.....that I notice is getting worse. They say the plague that builds up in the brain prior to full blown Alzheimers can start 50 years prior.....I wish we could have removable skulls so we can do a power wash every now and then...grin
rolling on the floor laughing getting old is kind of fun as you can use it as an excuse for mostly any thing.
All good but wisdom highlights is the best. rolling on the floor laughing

I'm not old, but I have been young for a very long time ...
Jeez, not sure what my friends would say if they had to post bail. laugh But they would do it. grin

Good ones Jim! wine
I know exactly what you mean?!!
Thanks everyone for your comments. Now we all need to pick the ponderism/s that applies to us and put them into practice.rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing wine
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Gentlejim

Gentlejim

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