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Wrinklyloveonline today!

WiZiD Zoo (Part 4)

Within a split second a thought flashed back through my mind, “if you’re not strong enough now, you never will be.” These words also seemed to rise from that different part in my brain, which considering they arose an instant after consciously forming thoughts, the difference seemed no better highlighted. Something about them felt very familiar – “if you’re not strong enough now, you never will be” – but I could not place my finger on why they felt familiar. At the time I did not even know why I would think such thoughts. They seemed so random and out of place. I was reasonably fit, physically active, and almost perfectly healthy. Still, something about them seemed personally recognizable. By the same token, it hadn’t felt like I was subconsciously answering my own question; not that it could be considered an answer. The words were more like a related statement; somewhat off the wall; more akin to a continuing (weird) conversation. I guess that here I should make some pseudo intellectual rationalizing claim along the lines of perhaps because of the weird feeling that I could have talked over the words… or even though the only explanation that made any real sense is that the words rose up from within the depths of my subconscious mind… but I’m not. The fact is I don’t exactly know why I treated the thoughts as if someone else had spoken them. I just did. I cannot even explain why I didn’t instantly reject the entire concept outright – try to convince myself of something different. After all, I had been instructed by just about every aspect of society to ridicule, fear, and reject the concept it long ago labelled mind reading. But none of that occurred to me; didn’t even cross my mind. Strange as it might sound, all I did think about was the question, “do you want to know?” The latter, “if you’re not strong enough now, you never will be,” did cross my mind for perhaps a second.
Fully comprehending myself blind to what I might discover, I thought yes, yes I want to know. Rather than feeling apprehension over my decision I suddenly felt calm and then I returned to the relaxed state I’d been experiencing just before the image appeared. Then it occurred to me that, after all, if I wasn’t strong enough now, I never would be; whatever that meant. I accept now, rightly or wrongly, that had I thought replied with no, no I do not want to know, then that might have been the end of the matter. Of course, I did say yes so I’ll never truly know for certain.
That enactment, me thought asking myself if I wanted to know, might at best sound a little unusual. I feel now that I had to formally accept responsibility for what might occur next; that no matter what happened, no matter what I ultimately learned, I would always understand that I had thought yes, I want to know and that the decision had been mine; I had acknowledged a definite choice in the matter. In hind sight it could be that subconsciously I somehow knew how long the revelation process might take and the toll it would exert upon my emotional and physical well being. Over the next five or six years, as my mind plummeted into and fought its way through a living nightmare, I would ponder the aptness of those words – if you’re not strong enough now, you never will be. Almost twenty years on I guess the true test of any decision is given the opportunity again with the knowledge of foresight would I make the same choice?
The answer is yes, yes I would.
If I had said no and pushed the image away then I would not have discovered the truth about the image and ultimately my self. A part of me would have been lost forever. In that moment of negation I would have become less. My life would definitely be different to how it is now. I would be different. Quite possibly forever different and as they say, forever is a very long time.
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namarononline today!


I Really Cant See Much Difference................................................. Between What Goes On Here....Or For That Matter............................. What Is Said Here...................It Could Be...................And Then Again?............It Just Might Not Be
It All Depends On Whether You

"Believe It Or Not"

"Being The "Ramblin Man" That I Am?"

"Im Bound To "Ramble On"...All Over The Place"

detective detective detective detective detective
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aftershoxonline today!

what do all the long distance msgs mean?

It is clear from my profile that I am not interested in Long distance anything. No chat. No skype. No anything if you are not from the Denver area.

I still get random messages from all over. Some are no doubt scammers, but others are probably clueless guys who only look at pictures. I tell them that most community colleges offer courses in remedial reading...

What is the status of online dating sites these days? Are folks out there having cyber sex and exchanging nude pics? What are guys thinking when they contact a woman half way across the country?
jarred1online today!

We judge crazy and normal all day long.

A ring through your nose is crazier for many people than one through your ear. To be married as a man with three women at the same time is crazy, but having three girlfriends as a woman is very common. Eating your own dog is crazy, but not your own pig. cannibalism is not allowed, but when a priest in the church says that he is going to drink the blood of Jesus, we find that very normal.cheers
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Onthcrestofawaveonline now!

Calling it as I see it

Sorry but I'm going to keep calling BS

The drama

The playing victim

The "look at me syndrome"

And the arse kissing

Have a good day peeps

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britishcolumbianonline now!

Has anyone heard a peep from Jazz in her new home and country?

He Jazz it is high time you let us know how things have turned out for you in your new digs.
We care and want to know okay /hug Jenny
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britishcolumbianonline now!

"Teddy Bear" is my handle, my daddy's really, he died driving his truck a month ago in blinding snow

I was on the outskirts of a little southern town
Tryin' to reach my destination before the sun went down
The old CB was blarin' away on channel 1-9!
When there came a little boy's voice on the radio line
And he said: "Breaker 1-9! Is anyone there?
ome on back, truckers and talk to Teddy Bear!"
Well, I keyed the mike and said: "You got it, Teddy Bear!"
And a little boy's voice came back on the air
"'Preciate the break, Who we got on that end?"
I told him my handle, and, then he began:
"Now, I'm not supposed to bother you fellows out there
Mom says you're busy and for me to stay off the air
But you see, I get lonely and it helps to talk
'Cause that's about all I can do, I'm crippled, and, I can't walk!"
I came back and told him to fire up that mike
And I'd talk to him, as long as he liked
"This was my dad's radio", the little boy said
"But I guess it's mine and mom's now, 'cause my daddy's dead!"
"Dad had a wreck about a month ago
He was trying to get home in a blindin' snow
Mom has to work now, to make ends meet
And I'm not much help, with my two crippled feet!"
"She says not to worry that we'll make it alright
But, I hear her crying, sometimes late at night
You know there's just one thing I want more than anything else to see
Aw, I know you guys are too busy to bother with me!"
"But, you see, my dad used to take me for rides when he was home
But, I guess that's all over now, since my daddy's gone
Not one breaker came on the old CB
As that little crippled boy talked with me
I tried hard to swallow a lump that just wouldn't stay down
As I thought about my boy back in Greenville Town
"Dad was going to take mom and me with him later on this year, Why,
l remember 'I'm saying: 'Someday this old truck will be yours, Teddy Bear!'
But, I know I'll never get to ride an 18-wheeler again
But, this old base will keep me in touch with all my trucker friends!"
"Teddy Bear's gonna back on out now and leave you alone
'Cause it's about time for mom to come home
But, you give me a shout when you're passin' through
And I'll sure be happy to come back to you!"
Well, I came back and I said: uh! "Before you go 10-10
What's your home 20, little CB friend?"
Well, he gave me his address and I didn't once hesitate
'Cause this hot load of freight was just gonna have to wait
I turned that truck around on a dime
And headed straight for Jackson Street, 229
And as I rounded the corner, oh, I got one heck of a shock
late wheelers were lined up for three city blocks!
Why, I guess every driver for miles around had caught Teddy Bear's call
And that little crippled boy was having a ball
For as fast as one driver would carry him in
Another would carry him to his truck and take off again
Well, you better believe I took my turn at riding Teddy Bear
And then I carried him back in and put him down in his chair
And buddy if I never live to see happiness again
I want you to know I saw it that day, in the face of that little man
We took up a collection for him before his mama got home
And each driver said goodbye and then they all were gone
He shook my hand with a mile-long grin
And said: "So long, trucker I'll catch ya again!"
Well, I hit the Interstate with tears in my eyes
I turned on the radio and I got another surprise
"Breaker 1-9!" Came a voice on the air
"Just one word of thanks from Mama Teddy Bear!"
"We wish each and every one, a special prayer for you
'Cause, You just made my little boy's dream come true
I'll sign off now, before, I start to cry
May God ride with you, 10-4, and goodbye."
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Marblecollectoronline now!

In the mirror

Look into the mirror. Not just at the face. Look into your own eyes. You are looking at the only person you have to put up with the rest of you life. Be honest with yourself. You can't lie to you. You will catch you every time. You can't steal from yourself. Be honest. Except who you are. Become your own best friend. You are the one who has to Deeside to love you or hate you. If you hate you. You will always hold you back. If you love you you will take better care of you. If you don't like who you are change. You alone can change you. If there are things you don't like get rid of them. Things you like improve soon them. Your happiness is up to you. You alone can help you. You can only depend on you. Like yourself. Forgive yourself. Ask God to forgive you and repent. Stop hurting yourself and start helping yourself. Look yourself in the eyes. Do nothing that you can't forgive yourself for. Take care of you nobody else will your whole life. Smile tomorrow is a new day and a new adventure. Your world will be better that way. The whole world would be a better place if everyone would do this.dancing
jarred1online today!

According to a recent study you should not snort Viagra.

........................... According to a recent study you should not snort Viagra.
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Palmfrondonline today!

what happened to theway and others?

they make a big show like peacocks spreading colorful tail feathers, only to disappear. they tread on the path of flirtation, only to disappear...what a strange world this place is.
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