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..after that blog about wanking and photos..our little pilot has gone awol.

Come on you old dog..I got this treatment years ago..man up and get back in here with your soft top mercedes and steel toe cap CAT boots.

Just coz you're a lousy wanker, take it on the chin and move on geezer.

Remember over the last few months I ve commented on how much I hate drivers who text when they re driving. Well on sunday a early 20s indian fellow blew thru a yield sign and hit the rear portion of my car, ,and spun the car around. He then approached me, then noticed alot of damage to his car, then ran back to his car and drove off. The police are looking for him and his damaged car.
I m thankful I wasn t hurt, and my car can be repaired, but the thought of it could have been my neighbors kids crossing the street there ,that quiet sunday morning scared me. Courtesy on the road don t exist anymore,
And some of my friends wonder why I go shopping in the early early morning hrs,
, Maybe I m not as crazy as some people think,

Whilst driving along the motorway the other day, I felt the vehicle was steering ever so slightly to the left. Whenst I was checking the relative positioning of my testicles I noticed the one on the left was sitting slightly lower than the right. By positioning a cigarette packet under the left testicle hence raising it, I noticed the vehicle started tracking in a straight line again, which was lucky considering I was towing a car trailer at the time. And it saved me valuable money on a wheel realignment.

That they are putting dog food into the meat pies, the baker reckons he's been doing it for years. And he also reckons he never washes his hands after backing one out, because nobody has complained so far.

I'm not sure how many thousands of religions all over the world but I couldn't care less which one does a friend belong to. When I look at a person I don't think/wonder which religion he/she belongs to. The respect that they give me is more than enough for me, f*ck the rest

I'm born Christian, family go to church every Sunday, I used to read the BIble during mass every Sunday. I spent many years in a convent school and nuns assigned me as a catechist to little children during my younger years. I married a Muslim man, I have a son who follows Islam and have friends who are not believers so obviously it's not something that make a difference to the relationship I have with people.

I'm bored and occasionally attend my friends' Bible study, more of a social thing for me than religious. I know they're praying for a miracle to convert me, it's not gonna happen but it feels good to be with kind hearted-people lifting their hearts to God and asking for blessings and guidance for themselves and others.

I received messages from other members here asking what religion do I really belong to Some friends even asked if I really attended the Bible study the other night, of course I did I didn't make it up so I can have an excuse to be late on my date

Just because I post some naughty blogs here, doesn't mean I don't believe/respect others' or my own religion ( whatever it is )

Have a blessed Tuesday everyone

The other night I was in bed with my girlfriend. We talked for a while, then it was getting late so we decided to go to sleep. But then she said something unusual- Goodnight sugar plum... Well, I was surprised to say the least because a sugar plum is a squishy piece of fruit that some people dont like. In fact, some insects lay their eggs on them, and the larvae then bore their way into the flesh. And probably pupate as well.

In short, she was calling me a shitty piece of fruit nobody wants thats full of maggots and diseases. Well I thought thats just lovely isn't it, after I bought you all that KFC and said nice things about her cottage cheese thighs. I didnt want to cause a fuss or get into an argument, but at the same time if I said nothing she'd keep saying it every night. So I said- look, why dont you go and pleasure a truck driver you filthy skank.

Anyway, I dont know why she went to bed at all actually. I thought we were going to sleep, but apparently women prefer crying and throwing things to sleeping these days. Go figure.

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OK, people, I'm trying to lighten up the mood here. Didn't want to post a blog or talk about this topic but would be interesting to know what's your take on this

Met a nice guy online, you exchanged nice messages, he's in another country, you met up few days later...coffee date turned into a very fun dinner date. There was instant attraction, you both connected...had a little bit of holding hands and some goodnight kisses and difficulty parting ways. He went to another country the next day, sent you lots of messages...said you're the one he's looking for and wants to have a happy ever after with you. He started talking about having kids and family and a happy life together. Promises to keep you safe and happy, wants to have a blissful life with you and children..., will do everything you ask him to and coming back in few days to see you again and talk about lots of possibilities and happy future. Ain't it he crazy? The whole thing sounds like a big joke...but the guy seems serious...mid- 40s, have a great job, very attractive, he's got it all ...a perfect catch.

Would you take him seriously?

and this one is called Dickie

What's going to happen, if you're at the supermarket and you see salami is selling two-for-one so you get two. You've already got four grapefruits in the trolley. As the trolley goes over a bump, the salamis bounce around and settle in a crossed position. Which we all know what that means. And so hastily you try to cover up things with some zucchinis, which unfortunately sends out a message to a different crowd. And so, in exasperation, you try to cover the whole thing up behind a French loaf of bread. Please help, I'm so confused right now.